Have people not heard of depreciation, maintenance, restocking?
Oh. Oh waitaminute I see the angle here. Mining company shares to goldbugs, substandard shovels and rations to 49ers, stakes in stablecoin exchanges to the common techbro, and now, at last, "ISO-Certified Vend Automation Accreditation Training" where you can get all the tools you need to STRIKE IT BIG. Then you can rope in more people with the scam, and they can rope in more people yadda yadda yadda
Another goddamn grift . . did we really need another? . . in search of the last dregs of pocket change lost in the American cushions. Looking for actual returns that aren't sacked with fees and conditions, everyone wondering, with an ever-growing suspicion, that all the new clever retirement "vehicles"[1] they've been dumping money in their entire lives will grow mysteriously inaccessible, in a suspiciously timely fashion, until they are all dead.
Shit. Put up a vending machine that dispenses Quietus pills, then you might get some business.
Forgive my cynicism, please. It's not a luxury I can afford at the moment.
[1] Which not-so-coincidentally inflate the market valuation of the same industries employing them. Jesus Christ, did anyone think for twenty seconds about the follow-on effects of that? Whelp. Too late now.