“Thus, a good man, though a slave, is free; but a wicked man, though a king, is a slave. For he serves, not one man alone, but what is worse, as many masters as he has vices.”
- St Augustine
Self-control signals and affords power
41–50 of 137 posts
Re: Self-control signals and affords power
#42Correlates with the relatively high number of executives I know who do not drink alcohol.
Re: Self-control signals and affords power
#43Earlier quoted context omitted.
> ...making excuses when you read this article for why the power hierarchy is against you, or that there is bias in the results > ...this post triggered you Definitely the language choices of an unbiased perspective from someone who doesn't have an axe to grind
Are these words really that verboten now?
No, but a person's choice of even our non-verboten words will still cause others to make certain assumptions about them.
Re: Self-control signals and affords power
#44This conclusion is a bit tautological: another way to frame "self-control" is "power over yourself" or "ability to influence your own actions". Of course people who have power over N=1 people are more likely to be perceived as "powerful" than people who have no self-control i.e. N=0, because they are.
In other words, self-control doesn't just "lead to" power, it is power.
Re: Self-control signals and affords power
#45"Across all experiments, individuals with high self-control were seen as more powerful, and as better suited for powerful roles, than individuals with low self-control." Part of me sees this research as "doing everything by the book" and consequently failing to capture important insights. For instance, every economic model of humans assumes that we're "rational agents", yet we know that people with poor impulse contr…
Trump and Elon Musk have incredible self control. They have selective outlets, yes. But they also both drive themselves constantly, invariably in the face of resistance. They're both self control addicts whose entire lives are built around the question "How much resistance can I overcome?"
Re: Self-control signals and affords power
#46Wonder if companies setting "Stretch" goals, and having people fail, is actually a form of control. Get results, but also keeps employees down. People may be less inclined to ask for raise if they miss goals, even if the results were 'good'.
There's a coaching philosophy that says to never praise unconditionally; rather every piece of praise should be followed with a criticism.
I suppose this is theoretically a good practice, but only if you're already operating in a high-trust environment. If you're not, it starts to feel like you're never good enough, because absolutely every victory, no matter how big or small, is followed up with "but it could be better...". Which is, again technically accurate, but part of the finesse of being a good people-manager is understanding that humans are not robots who can simply process and accept criticism without any emotional hangups.
Re: Self-control signals and affords power
#47Correlates with the relatively high number of executives I know who do not drink alcohol.
Unexpected comment! Can you provide details? I have not noticed a correlation, and about a half of the successful executives I see drink heavily and frequently, and nearly all drink a little (except me).
Re: Self-control signals and affords power
#48Earlier quoted context omitted.
> less prone to get "bullied" by other managers into doing work for them and you can stand up more for your team This is the real key. Management is about controlling others and not letting others control you without compensation. > I would personally trust others who have self-control more than those who don't for time-sensitive and critical tasks because I can rely on them to regulate their emotions and give honest…
>I was heavily indoctrinated in the language of self-control, responsibility, and accountability, and these made me easy to exploit. My own "red pill" moment involved understanding these as tools of power rather than facts of the world, thereby freeing myself to better represent my own interests. Can you give some clearer examples? I am curious how this is done in those circles.
I grew up in central Pennsylvania farm country. This is a conservative area that has voted republican in every presidential election since Lincoln. The area is also rich in both Amish and Mennonite families. When a whole area is so packed with conservative ideas and individual it has a strong effect on what is "common sense". Common sense is not generally universal it is culturally based.
The best example I can think of is that 85% of the kids in my High School had the same haircut and rarely left the area. Suddenly mTV arrived on cable and the kids and hairstyles went wild. I know of parents calling the cable company to get mTV removed from the home(unsuccessfully).
It is simply a cultural standard.
Re: Self-control signals and affords power
#49This is something I've noticed in myself and I'm glad there's research to back this, although this is an open secret to those who do master self-control. I've spent the last three to four years working on self-control and discipline after I hit rock bottom in my life and realized I had no self-agency. For me, having greater self-control led me to ensure I can focus on providing value where it matters in my life, and…
> Not every thought needs to be acted on, especially if the thoughts come from external sources.
I've heard it said (I believe by Hormozi on Williamson's podcast) that at a certain level, success becomes mostly about saying no to increasingly great opportunities.
I can confirm this is relevant near the bottom too, at least if you have a high level of openness (personality dimension) and are presented with inspiration on a regular basis.
The 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration quote comes to mind.
The principle of sacrifice comes to mind. It seems to be a choice between sacrificing many small things, or a few great things.
Re: Self-control signals and affords power
#50A controversial take from this is that, aside from the health benefits, you will also accrue personal and professional benefits from not being fat. I remember interviewing when I was chubbier post-COVID thinking that the only evidence the interviewer has of my self-control and drive is that I have none. Best case scenario, you are interviewing a temporarily embarrassed skinny person. Noble prize winner James Watson,…
> …you will also accrue personal and professional benefits from not being fat.
As an overweight person, I don't think it's controversial. You'll also accrue personal and professional benefits from being a tall man and/or good-looking.
However, "fat people have no self-control" is still fatphobia and ignores the interplay of genetic, metabolic, physiological, cultural, socio-economic, and environmental factors that contribute to obesity. There are countless fat people who are incredibly smart and hard-working, and have exquisite discipline in most areas of their life.