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Losing two jobs in one year

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Re: Losing two jobs in one year

#31

Post by mcbutterbunz »

SR2Z wrote: post #17
vunderba wrote: post #7

If you only take one thing from this article, let it be this line: My work is only part of my identity. I'd argue that unless you're literally curing cancer, it should be the least important part of your identity. I've never let work be more than the tiniest facet of my existence that provides the resources necessary to well... not die. I understand this isn't the easiest thing for most people - tribalism and pack id…

IMO it's OK for work to be a big part of your identity. People should strive to achieve things professionally; it's a very human thing to master a craft for a living. But, to be fair, work != your specific company. It's stupid to tie your identity to the people hiring you.

I also might argue that the degree to which it is your identity will change through your life. Certainly in my 20s I had less of an idea of who I was so my value to society was rooted in how much I was paid or my perceived importance. I’ve seen as I age that my work has become less a part of my identity, but definitely greater than zero. I’ll check back in a decade and give an update :)

Re: Losing two jobs in one year

#32

Post by RangerScience »

toomuchtodo wrote: post #13
thierrydamiba wrote: post #10

Earlier quoted context omitted.

How do you balance this mindset with the cold hard reality that one needs to make money? I’m currently unemployed and I am lucky to have a generous runway, but that runway will run out eventually. The idea that nothing matters outside of family, friends, etc is tempting but I have made sacrifices in relationships with others and myself to be a more employable candidate. For example I’m taking LLM classes on Sunday mo…

You do the work for the money, but you don't invest yourself in the work: you care about the people who love you back at home. In the end, the work (caveat edge cases) will be meaningless. You're converting time into fiat you need to pay for life. You can always make more money, time is non renewable. "Today is your last day." "Meh, whatevs, going home to my family." https://waitbutwhy.com/2014/05/life-weeks.html htt…

Friend of mine went to Egypt, was floored by the pyramids (and more), so now I’m thinking along the lines of:

It won’t matter, so get drunk with your friends and stack some rocks.

Re: Losing two jobs in one year

#33

Post by crooked-v »

bruce511 wrote: post #14
crooked-v wrote: post #4

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Unfortunately, the US has a huge number of people who would rather have insurance-run for-profit death panels than government-run non-profit death panels.

I'm not downvoting you, because I assume uour comment was in good faith. The phrase "death panels" though is unfortunate. Nobody has death panels, nobody wants death panels, no health system anywhere private or public has death panels. It's just a scary phrase used in a political context. Ultimately all health systems make choices at every level of care. Triage is a thing. Organ recipient lists are a thing. Hospital…

> The phrase "death panels" though is unfortunate.

The phrase "death panels" is intentionally sarcastic mockery of the kind of people who unironically repeat Republican lies, by way of pointing out how even if the lie was true, it would be less harmful than the current state of affairs. I would have thought that was pretty obvious, but I guess not.

Re: Losing two jobs in one year

#34

Post by phlipski »

eru wrote: post #20
vunderba wrote: post #7

If you only take one thing from this article, let it be this line: My work is only part of my identity. I'd argue that unless you're literally curing cancer, it should be the least important part of your identity. I've never let work be more than the tiniest facet of my existence that provides the resources necessary to well... not die. I understand this isn't the easiest thing for most people - tribalism and pack id…

> I'd argue that unless you're literally curing cancer, it should be the least important part of your identity. You are probably going too far. You are spending a reasonable fraction of your waking life at your career. So you can make it a reasonable fraction of your identity.

YOU (in the non-personal sense) may make your job an important part of your identity. But I would ask you to ask yourself the following questions - "What do your close friends do for a living? Does what they do for a living matter to YOU? Does what they do for a living in any way affect your relationship?"

I ask this as a thought experiment because I personally believe that we THINK people care about our jobs more than they really do. True friendship should (and does) transcend "jobs".

Maybe I'm an outlier - but I believe most folks just want to have a good time with their friends - specific careers be damned!

Re: Losing two jobs in one year

#35

Post by Fire-Dragon-DoL »

vunderba wrote: post #7

If you only take one thing from this article, let it be this line: My work is only part of my identity. I'd argue that unless you're literally curing cancer, it should be the least important part of your identity. I've never let work be more than the tiniest facet of my existence that provides the resources necessary to well... not die. I understand this isn't the easiest thing for most people - tribalism and pack id…

I hear this argument and I should point out that it can hurt people saying something like that. I understand where you are coming from and I disagree strongly with your statement.

Around age 12 I discovered software development and became my greatest passion. It helped me escape MMORPG addiction and being happy (have a family, buy a home, pursue my hobbies).

If I lost my job I would be sad, no doubt, but I would still be me, a passionate software developer. If you told me I wouldn't be able to write code anymore because of some illness, I would be in a very bad spot, way worse than if I lost my job.

My profession is part of my identity in a strong way, my job is business (although I do love the place I work at).

Re: Losing two jobs in one year

#36

Post by mathattack »

It was a revelation the first time I learned how disposable I was.

The flip side to “work isn’t your identity” is I find that I do my best work when I’m fully engaged and care deeply about my coworkers.

Re: Losing two jobs in one year

#37

Post by begueradj »

vunderba wrote: post #7

If you only take one thing from this article, let it be this line: My work is only part of my identity. I'd argue that unless you're literally curing cancer, it should be the least important part of your identity. I've never let work be more than the tiniest facet of my existence that provides the resources necessary to well... not die. I understand this isn't the easiest thing for most people - tribalism and pack id…

There is what we call: "Occupational identity": https://link.springer.com/chapter/10.1007/978-1-4419-7988-9_...

Re: Losing two jobs in one year

#38

Post by aquarkortwo »

toomuchtodo wrote: post #13
thierrydamiba wrote: post #10

Earlier quoted context omitted.

How do you balance this mindset with the cold hard reality that one needs to make money? I’m currently unemployed and I am lucky to have a generous runway, but that runway will run out eventually. The idea that nothing matters outside of family, friends, etc is tempting but I have made sacrifices in relationships with others and myself to be a more employable candidate. For example I’m taking LLM classes on Sunday mo…

You do the work for the money, but you don't invest yourself in the work: you care about the people who love you back at home. In the end, the work (caveat edge cases) will be meaningless. You're converting time into fiat you need to pay for life. You can always make more money, time is non renewable. "Today is your last day." "Meh, whatevs, going home to my family." https://waitbutwhy.com/2014/05/life-weeks.html htt…

My approach as well. Yep, agreed: we are just blips in the cosmic timeline.

The links are wonderful, thank you.

I appreciated the part about caregiver burnout:

"They are the shadow soldiers in the battle, where all the attention and support goes to the patient."

Re: Losing two jobs in one year

#39

Post by p1esk »

phlipski wrote: post #34
eru wrote: post #20

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I'd argue that unless you're literally curing cancer, it should be the least important part of your identity. You are probably going too far. You are spending a reasonable fraction of your waking life at your career. So you can make it a reasonable fraction of your identity.

YOU (in the non-personal sense) may make your job an important part of your identity. But I would ask you to ask yourself the following questions - "What do your close friends do for a living? Does what they do for a living matter to YOU? Does what they do for a living in any way affect your relationship?" I ask this as a thought experiment because I personally believe that we THINK people care about our jobs more th…

I might not care about what my friends do for a living (I do though), but I definitely care a lot about what I do for a living.

Re: Losing two jobs in one year

#40

Post by aquarkortwo »

RangerScience wrote: post #32
toomuchtodo wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You do the work for the money, but you don't invest yourself in the work: you care about the people who love you back at home. In the end, the work (caveat edge cases) will be meaningless. You're converting time into fiat you need to pay for life. You can always make more money, time is non renewable. "Today is your last day." "Meh, whatevs, going home to my family." https://waitbutwhy.com/2014/05/life-weeks.html htt…

Friend of mine went to Egypt, was floored by the pyramids (and more), so now I’m thinking along the lines of: It won’t matter, so get drunk with your friends and stack some rocks.

>it won't matter, so get drunk with your friends and stack some rocks.

Good to take a balanced approach, but my thoughts too a lot of the time. I am most likely going to go to Patagonia in the next few weeks/months, a dream of mine, and then go home and see grandparents while they are still around.

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