Hi,
Please read this book -
https://www.abebooks.com/9780312929725/Miracles-Happen-Inspi...
and after please contakt Briege McKenna
Losing my son
411–420 of 434 posts
Re: Losing my son
#412Hi,
Please read this book -
https://www.abebooks.com/9780312929725/Miracles-Happen-Inspi...
and after please contakt Briege McKenna
Re: Losing my son
#413I will make some personal comments to Lars privately, but let me say this, publicly: I read between 10 and 100 articles or posts linked from HN every single day, and I have for years. As you can see for yourselves, I almost never comment. At this late stage in my life and career, it just seems fruitless to add my lone voice to the world of mostly-vapid, interconnected noise. But Lar’s three poignant and vulnerable es…
Write more, please.
> I almost never comment. At this late stage in my life and career, it just seems fruitless to add my lone voice to the world of mostly-vapid, interconnected noise.
Late stage implies you’re older, and thus have seen a lot. You might get comments from people you’d rather not hear from, but your writing itself reaches people like me, who want to learn from your perspective.
Re: Losing my son
#414Earlier quoted context omitted.
There is no medicine here. Some problems don't have a solution. Some aren't even amenable to compromise. Sometimes compromise is even worse. It sucks but it's the truth.
No. The truth is that there is medicine you can take, you just don't want to because it tastes bad. It's okay if you want to trick yourself into hurting yourself, but don't act like it's not an option. This problem may not always have a solution, but there are ways to minimise the problem and they're achievable by every single person.
well the covid vaccine is the medicine for covid?
not sure if it was effective at even stopping infection.
Re: Losing my son
#415I lost my 3 1/2 year old daughter to sudden illness about 10 months ago. Be gentle to yourself and your family. There will be times where you aren’t actively feeling the grief, but they pull you into theirs or vice versa. There will be times where your love and grief for your lost child will make it easy to forget to cherish the loved ones in front of you. As you figure out how to live life from here– may you find a…
I’m sorry for your loss and thank you for sharing that
Re: Losing my son
#416I have to say I'm really humbled to suddenly see this on the front page. Today was a particularly hard day; I won't go into details but taking care of a permanently disabled invalid involves a lot of ups and downs and some fairly messy manual labor to keep them comfortable and in good shape. I love you all. Hug your kids if you have em. EDIT: The above blog post here was one of three things I wrote in the immediate a…
I'm sorry to say i know your pain.
No words will make this easier, it just dulls over time.
I understand the motivation for stability and applaud you for that. My experiences were similar.
Re: Losing my son
#417I’m sorry for your situation. Having gone myself as a 5 year old sibling through something like this I wish to stress this: Don’t let your other children become chronically mentally ill, send them to the psychotherapist and counselor and do that for years. You can’t imagine the amount of suffering they will have untreated. This is not something that you can just outlive and your children are dependent on you supporti…
So weird that I started reading C. S. Lewis’ “a grief observed” yesterday and today this popped up on hn. Your comment and OP’s thread made me go from a lurker to registering an account. I was 2.5 years old when my brother was born with complications, brain damage being one of them. Could breathe by himself, but fed through a tube and couldn’t move. 3 months later he died. Not sure what the total impact from this eve…
Hi,
thanks for your comment. Your story touched me immediately in my heart.
I can recommend you this book on your quest to get more insights and ideas for healing:
"Healing Developmental Trauma: How Early Trauma Affects Self-Regulation, Self-Image, and the Capacity for Relationship" from Laurence Heller, PhD
Re: Losing my son
#418Being a father of two (oldest 3,5 years old) this kind of thread works as a friendly reminder of thankfulness. It suddenly opens up that deep void as thinking of your own death or the edge of the universe might do. I will hug my family and appreciate life and current happiness, knowing it can all end anytime. Thanks for the reminder and love to you all .
Re: Losing my son
#419Earlier quoted context omitted.
Dang flagged and commented on this thread stating that my discussion on helping the poster was a "personal attack" on them. Wow. Now I know why there is so much resentment towards beneficial growth outwards from trauma.... dang is insane.
How many people have to reply and tell you you're completely and totally wrong about this before you'll at least take a step back and consider that you've missed something important? Serious question. I'm genuinely wondering if there's a number.
Wow you sound upset. I am not wrong even slightly, no matter how many upset people reply to my comments.
Now I know why you're enabling the other person at least.
Re: Losing my son
#420Earlier quoted context omitted.
You do have a choice. Everything we do is sourced by choices. It's weird that you think helping people is not advice. I never said stop thinking about it. I said think about it, pass it through your pipeline of thought and then acknowledge it and leave it.
It's the "and leave it" part everyone is disagreeing with you about. Major trauma changes you. There is no "leaving it." There is only relearning how to be the way you are now in the world so you can move forward.
Yes. Everyone is capable of leaving it.
Major trauma changes you. That's why you need to leave it rather than absorbing it in your day to day life.
>There is only relearning how to be the way you are now in the world so you can move forward.
That's called leaving it LOL what.