I don't know if ending another human's life leaves any possibility of redemption for a person, but reading this I still empathize with the sense of loss and powerlessness that emanate from this letter.
I suspect many are aware of this but for those uninformed: Reiser committed premeditated murder of his (ex?)wife Nina around 2006 and hid her body so well they could not find her. He made his children think either that their mother abandoned them. He had thought without a body he could not be charged and convicted. I believe he waited until it was apparent he would lose the trial and then plead down so that they coul…
Humans are amazing at compartmentalizing things like this away, even while they are happening.
It is impossible to know from this single datapoint if he is remorseful or not, but it is not at all outside of the realm of possibility.
As a child I merely punched my brother and I tried to kill myself afterwards because of the guilt. In the moment I could not have been more prescient about what I was about to do and what I was doing. I recalled how I had observed him fighting others, how he threw punches, how he swung his arm based on how angry he was, and I planned an arc that took advantage of his habits and clocked him. Knocked him out in one punch.
The instant he hit the floor I felt remorse like I had never felt before. Who the hell am I to take an action like that?!
Anyway, how someone feels while doing something like that does not necessarily reflect how they feel at any other time in their lives. It also may reflect how they are at all times, or anywhere in between.
There is no foolproof way to know.