Losing my son

I’m really feeling sorry for both the author and his family. Can’t imagine what they must be going through.

When I was 10 my oldest sibling went through a coma and after coming out of it some time later she did some things that my parents were not happy about. My family was going through some things and me being the youngest was completely neglected. I was shoved in a room and my family being well off all the problems were tried to be solved by money. Then just as things were getting a little better for me between 11-12 I was molested a few times. I was too scared to talk to anyone. My parents were not bothered much. 19 years later today I have PTSD and I struggle with anxiety depression panic. In my entire life I had no one to talk to and no one loved me. I was unable to make any connections in life. I do therapy which helps a little. I fell in love with someone 12 years ago which was the only time I felt something in life but she never liked me and till this day I hope for a miracle. There was a time few years ago I was unable to leave my room without panic attacks as that was the only place I felt safe. Somehow I was able to work my way into a graduate degree in computer science from a top school and a job. However I still spent the last 3 days crying alone. I deal with it every single day every single hour of my life. Life gets better some days and worse some days.

Anyway my point is that your children and your spouse need you the most right now. This is a turning point for everyone in the family. Hold them close. Talk to them. They may show they are strong and handling it well but they need you more than you might think. Some things cannot be undone. Some things cannot be changed. But many are in control today and a lot will be decided about the future at this time. So please just hold them close and tell them you love them. I will pray for you and your family.

Death can have so many meanings when I read this. I worry I'll forget what they smelled like, what they sounded like. What songs they would've been singing. What what what. The 'veil of tears' is perfectly apt. It both blinds me from the blessing I personally have to be living yet I'm I'm unaware of how short sighted I am. That beyond this veil so much of what I love is beyond the awareness of my own being. I hope he and his family finds respite.

That is devastating. Beyond words. As a parent had stop reading because I could imagine that happening to my son. Eventually I went back and continued.

I hope they eventually find some comfort and some peace…

Life and its trappings are very precious. I once got slammed on here by some woke assholes for saying most people nowadays live better than John D. Rockefeller.

It’s like Sam Harris says, there are so many people who on their best day would choose to be you on your worst.

Value what you have

I was reading this article and only at the end did it click that the author is a close childhood friend of mine, but we have since fallen out of touch. Love you, Lars, BT.