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Fairness and kindness are not weaknesses

gerrymcgovern.com

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Re: Fairness and kindness are not weaknesses

#3

Post by glcihgnwe »

No, but it's dangerous to grant it to people who don't reciprocate. One of the diversity officers at my company was recently discovered to have been embezzling money from the company, cloaking oneself in noble moral intentions and telling a satisfying moral story is just that: speech. We need to see folks demonstrate good faith before inviting them into a system of trade for mutual benefit.

Re: Fairness and kindness are not weaknesses

#4

Post by tombert »

I got my iPhone stolen from me a few months ago in a sort of mugging.

I say "sort of", because it wasn't really violent, I wasn't injured, but rather two teenagers (I'd say roughly 17-18) came up to me, one asked if he could call his mom, I tell him that I'll call her on speaker phone, I unlock my phone, then his friend grabs my phone, the first guy shoves me, and they run away. I didn't chase after them because I had no idea if they had a knife or anything. [1]

That really sucked, I liked that phone, but the part that sucked worse was everyone felt compelled to give me a long victim-blamey lecture about how you can't trust anyone and that I shouldn't have unlocked my phone, and that they would never fall for anything like that. Usually I just rolled my eyes with this, but eventually one person wouldn't relent, constantly explaining that in NYC this is something you gotta know, despite the fact that I have lived in NYC longer than this person.

Eventually I responded back with "you know, I appreciate the lecture, but having empathy isn't a weakness you fucking moron. If I was stuck in Manhattan without a phone I would want someone to help me. I guess I just thought it was right to pay it forward. I'm sorry that you don't feel that way".

For some reason, that guy hasn't talked to me since.

[1] Before I get a bunch of suggestions, I did report the phone as stolen on the FindMy app, and I filed a police report with the IMEI.

Re: Fairness and kindness are not weaknesses

#5

Post by rainonmoon »

tombert wrote: post #4

I got my iPhone stolen from me a few months ago in a sort of mugging. I say "sort of", because it wasn't really violent, I wasn't injured, but rather two teenagers (I'd say roughly 17-18) came up to me, one asked if he could call his mom, I tell him that I'll call her on speaker phone, I unlock my phone, then his friend grabs my phone, the first guy shoves me, and they run away. I didn't chase after them because I ha…

Yeah those people can go screw (respectfully, I mean; I'm sure some are your friends.) Sorry that happened to you, but for what it's worth, this internet stranger would've done exactly the same thing, and I think your reasoning is sound.

Re: Fairness and kindness are not weaknesses

#6

Post by davorak »

glcihgnwe wrote: post #3

No, but it's dangerous to grant it to people who don't reciprocate. One of the diversity officers at my company was recently discovered to have been embezzling money from the company, cloaking oneself in noble moral intentions and telling a satisfying moral story is just that: speech. We need to see folks demonstrate good faith before inviting them into a system of trade for mutual benefit.

> We need to see folks demonstrate good faith before inviting them into a system of trade for mutual benefit.

Starting form zero a society where everyone follows this to the letter can not get started since there is no record of actions yet for people to judge people by.

Experimentally extending trust/opportunities in perhaps a limited fashion is one way to get the ball rolling on this

Re: Fairness and kindness are not weaknesses

#7

Post by tombert »

rainonmoon wrote: post #5
tombert wrote: post #4

I got my iPhone stolen from me a few months ago in a sort of mugging. I say "sort of", because it wasn't really violent, I wasn't injured, but rather two teenagers (I'd say roughly 17-18) came up to me, one asked if he could call his mom, I tell him that I'll call her on speaker phone, I unlock my phone, then his friend grabs my phone, the first guy shoves me, and they run away. I didn't chase after them because I ha…

Yeah those people can go screw (respectfully, I mean; I'm sure some are your friends.) Sorry that happened to you, but for what it's worth, this internet stranger would've done exactly the same thing, and I think your reasoning is sound.

I mean, I don't think that they meant anything by it. I just think it's easy for them to be in positions of judgement when nothing like that has happened to them.

I probably shouldn't have called the guy a fucking moron, I was just frustrated because everyone was giving me the same lecture.

Re: Fairness and kindness are not weaknesses

#9

Post by blablablerg »

tombert wrote: post #4

I got my iPhone stolen from me a few months ago in a sort of mugging. I say "sort of", because it wasn't really violent, I wasn't injured, but rather two teenagers (I'd say roughly 17-18) came up to me, one asked if he could call his mom, I tell him that I'll call her on speaker phone, I unlock my phone, then his friend grabs my phone, the first guy shoves me, and they run away. I didn't chase after them because I ha…

(Too much) empathy can definitely be a weakness. It is situational however, in a safe and peaceful environment it is beneficial and helpful, in less fortunate environments it can make you a target.
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