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“Yes” means “no”: The language of VCs

jacobbartlett.substack.com

21–30 of 217 posts

Re: “Yes” means “no”: The language of VCs

#21

Rubrik for early stage: 1. No product: -> went to stanford or harvard -> funded (no questions asked) -> held director level at faang -> funded -> everyone else -> probably not funded 2. Have product: -> not prestigious -> need real ARR with good growth -> prestigious -> need a product -> everyone else -> not funded

It's the whole fairground saying, right?

(I'm definitely in the middle-class bucket)

Re: “Yes” means “no”: The language of VCs

#22

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yeah i was more so thinking of first time founders. Second time founder is a different thing, though I dont think early employees ("founding engineers") get much respect.

“Founding ____” is not “founder”. It’s just a fancy way of saying “employee”. This is always been the case.

Never said it was, its a scam title. Only time it holds relevance is again if the founder already had a success. Then the chances of the equity being worth something are higher

Re: “Yes” means “no”: The language of VCs

#23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yeah i was more so thinking of first time founders. Second time founder is a different thing, though I dont think early employees ("founding engineers") get much respect.

“Founding ____” is not “founder”. It’s just a fancy way of saying “employee”. This is always been the case.

Seems sort of clearly misleading at any rate.

Re: “Yes” means “no”: The language of VCs

#24

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is almost accurate. I would add one more thing: -> Have previous success (as founder or as employee) in same space -> funded

Yeah i was more so thinking of first time founders. Second time founder is a different thing, though I dont think early employees ("founding engineers") get much respect.

They do - they just have to have had larger successes.

"Founding X" doesn't count for shit.

Being part of a team that built a hugely successful product teaches you a lot - it teaches you about the counterintuitive dynamics of superlinear growth. That is a very important mindset to bring to the table if you want to create a successful VC-funded startup.

Re: “Yes” means “no”: The language of VCs

#25
post #6

"Everyone wants investment from venture capitalists." Am I the only one not living in this bubble. I cofounded a boostrap business. Having cash to hire and not have to work two jobs would sure be nice, but if I am raising it would not be to be on Forbes list, it would be to build an actual business. The vanity of those people sometimes.

I really hope you read the second sentence and understood I was trying to be a little satirical here

I did, I enjoyed reading that, from ire to wry smile, in a sentence.

Re: “Yes” means “no”: The language of VCs

#26
I've never understood the cult around tech VCs, the ratio of self-regard to actual value delivered to the world (or even their own firms) has always seemed staggeringly out of scale with reality. And that's even true in a world that seems to have no shortage of unearned self-regard.

I guess if you play the game you can get your hands on a lottery ticket with pretty good odds. But seriously fuck these people and their egos.

I'm pretty sure if you build really solid tech or a growing company they'll come chase you, so I am really hard pressed to figure out why people should pay all that much attention to who they are and what they think at all.

Re: “Yes” means “no”: The language of VCs

#27
post #18

"Everyone wants investment from venture capitalists". I have a bootstrapped side project, Tunnelmole, turning a small profit and growing at a slow and steady rate on its own. I'm the engineer so I only really pay hosting costs, which are covered by the revenue, although in the early days I had to cover this. While venture capital is an option, if it continues to grow, it's entirely possible the venture capitalists ma…

I work at a VC firm. If the business can finance itself, you absolutely don’t need VC cash. Ultimately, that’s the goal - build a profitable business.

The only reason I'd consider it, is to accelerate the current growth, beyond what I can drive myself.

But it depends how my own efforts go, there's still a long way to go before my current methods become ineffective.

Re: “Yes” means “no”: The language of VCs

#28
post #26

I've never understood the cult around tech VCs, the ratio of self-regard to actual value delivered to the world (or even their own firms) has always seemed staggeringly out of scale with reality. And that's even true in a world that seems to have no shortage of unearned self-regard. I guess if you play the game you can get your hands on a lottery ticket with pretty good odds. But seriously fuck these people and their…

In terms of prestige finance, I suppose they probably deliver more value than private equity.

In terms of everything else...

Re: “Yes” means “no”: The language of VCs

#29

Rubrik for early stage: 1. No product: -> went to stanford or harvard -> funded (no questions asked) -> held director level at faang -> funded -> everyone else -> probably not funded 2. Have product: -> not prestigious -> need real ARR with good growth -> prestigious -> need a product -> everyone else -> not funded

This is almost accurate. I would add one more thing: -> Have previous success (as founder or as employee) in same space -> funded

No, definitely not as employee. Maybe founder. Failing as (a funded) founder is ok too.

Re: “Yes” means “no”: The language of VCs

#30
Maybe it's my business major background and my skepticism of all these tech companies that have no reasonable business model to make $'s, but unless there is an obvious need for investment like buying a large amount of real estate or machinery, why would you need VC money to build an app after you've already spent several months doing it?

It should run on it's own and not need investor money. You shouldn't be focused on getting VC's, you should focus on developing an app that actually turns a profit.

It's not that difficult. Anyways, I found your story really interesting. Good story :)

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