141–150 of 619 posts
Diamonds are worthless, but reject them at your own peril. When my friend proposed to his girlfriend of 3 years, because the ring didn’t have a diamond she said no.
Sounds like your friend dodged a bullet there.
(I proposed to my now-wife without a ring. After she said yes, we went shopping for one).
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Do you, uh... want to explain? It's definitely a cringy, antiquated phrase, but it doesn't seem harmful. People with wives should tie their own happiness to their wife's, shouldn't they?
> People with wives should tie their own happiness to their wife's, shouldn't they? I think it's more that the expectation that husbands exist to serve their wives is harmful. Be honest, do you really think a phrase meaning "keeping your husband happy and satisfied would make your life better" is not harmful?
No, why would it be harmful? The whole point of loving someone is caring about them and wanting them to be happy.
These threads are always great for men posting about how their wives love the imitation stones “just as much” and “I didn’t foolishly spend money.” As always, if it worked for your marriage, it worked, but many of us can sniff out a fake from across the room. And it will always look tacky and cheap and she will be wearing it, in theory, the rest of her life. I have visited exactly one jeweler in my life that set man…
Nobody can tell a lab grown diamond vs real by eye. They are the same. With the right lab equipment you might be able to tell the difference through some fluorescence or other very hard to perceive property. Honestly, what gives away lab grown diamonds is probably the lack of inclusions which mean they are "too" perfect.
With the right lab equipment, you can read the brand mark DeBeers puts on their mined diamonds, if nothing else.
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And make sure you appraise her of it - shenanigans like buying something else and passing it off as a diamond could result in her being absolutely embarrassed in front of her friends, which should not be a position you want to put her in.
From what I hear, moissanite (and man-made diamonds) are pretty much indistinguishable from natural diamonds. How would someone's friends figure out that it's not a natural diamond? I would think the only way the wife would know is if she asked about the diamond's papers, if she was going to get an insurance policy for it or something.
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Wedding bands have some utility though as if you get a gold one, you’re always carrying a small amount of gold to barter with.
I feel like if you're in a situation where you're reduced to bartering with someone with your gold wedding ring, chances are reasonably high that you're also in a situation where you don't get a say in whether they take your gold wedding ring.
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And make sure you appraise her of it - shenanigans like buying something else and passing it off as a diamond could result in her being absolutely embarrassed in front of her friends, which should not be a position you want to put her in.
Not everyone wants to spend $20,000 on a rock so that their spouse isn’t “embarrassed in front of her friends.”
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Do you, uh... want to explain? It's definitely a cringy, antiquated phrase, but it doesn't seem harmful. People with wives should tie their own happiness to their wife's, shouldn't they?
> People with wives should tie their own happiness to their wife's, shouldn't they? I think it's more that the expectation that husbands exist to serve their wives is harmful. Be honest, do you really think a phrase meaning "keeping your husband happy and satisfied would make your life better" is not harmful?
We have no precedent for this in modern times. Instead, diamond coöpted the dowry’s role in assuring a bride’s family stability in a world that diminished women.
> do you really think a phrase meaning "keeping your husband happy and satisfied would make your life better" is not harmful?
No. Making my friends, colleagues, co-workers and life partner happy makes me happy. If it doesn’t, they shouldn’t be in my life, or I need to adjust my relationship to civilisation.
With complete honesty, the best money I have spent has been experiences with close friends.
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Sure, but calling them your spouse then not giving a crap about their feelings is not fair. You were free to marry someone else, who thinks more in line the way you do.
You are making unjustified assumptions. I am a person who doesn't wish to spend $20,000 on a rock so that my wife won't be embarrassed in front of her friends. And that is why I chose to marry a woman who thinks that spending $20,000 on a rock is a silly thing to do.
I would like to take this moment to thank https://diamondssuck.com/ for preventing me from buying my wife a diamond, and getting her a much prettier moissanite instead. It's been on hn's front page several times.
Guys, buying diamonds, can complain all day about what a rip off it is (it is). But if you apprise your fiancé of the alternatives / opp costs (moissanite, man made, second hand, etc) and she still wants a new diamond, just get her a new diamond. It will make her happy for years. My wife had her heart set on a pink diamond, so that’s what I got her. I made it clear though that if I got this, she is not getting a new…