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Life lessons from the death bed

isonomiaquarterly.com

11–20 of 196 posts

Re: Life lessons from the death bed

#11

woe to the ones who live their life in fear

You need to balance risk and reward. Getting to the end and telling everyone to take more risks just because you personally have nothing to lose, or the risk worked out for you, is just lotto winners telling everyone to buy lotto tickets.

Re: Life lessons from the death bed

#12
People are different and so it makes sense that they'll handle death differently. Loneliness is a big problem. But I am surprised how often people fall for an anti-materialist view, yeah money's not everything, but I think its a privileged view to have. Its easy to say money is not important once you've made alot of it. I think its helpful to have some, but obv. spending all your time in its pursuit is a waste.

Re: Life lessons from the death bed

#13
As I grow older, I realize that I what is important is to have a “good taste in your mouth” after any interaction, I will not say anything like “see only the positives” etc. but for sure don’t only see the negatives. At the end of the day, try to figure out what works for you before your death bed

Re: Life lessons from the death bed

#14
Touching stuff...

It could be middle age tainting my perspective... but sometimes I feel this sort of... not visceral, but very close and undeniable... experience with death is easier for people who are young.

Death isn't real for most people at 17, no matter how much they have seen, many see the death of a grandparent, or two, or perhaps even four, before reaching 17, but most still enter their late teens, feeling invincible and like death is a whole lifetime away... because on a sort of undeniable personal narrative level is is... it is a lifetime away... and things that feel a lifetime away are much easier to think about than things that feel like they get closer every year. In middle age you know your to some statistical average "about half way there"... and that's a very different place from which to begin having this kind of life experience.

Re: Life lessons from the death bed

#18

People are different and so it makes sense that they'll handle death differently. Loneliness is a big problem. But I am surprised how often people fall for an anti-materialist view, yeah money's not everything, but I think its a privileged view to have. Its easy to say money is not important once you've made alot of it. I think its helpful to have some, but obv. spending all your time in its pursuit is a waste.

there is a very large amount of forgetting and memory rewriting for most people who make it that far. for most of us who survive until that old age our life will be more of an idealised narrative that factual - so yes, not very useful for others earlier in their journey

Re: Life lessons from the death bed

#19
post #4

Nice vignettes but I don't really believe it. Not knocking those getting value out of them, but they don't work for me.

The best changes I’ve made in my life are 1. Completely removing alcohol. 2. Removing highly processed foods and refined sugars. 3. Accepting myself for who I am, faults and all. I can’t change certain things about myself, so I just need to accept that and focus on the things I can change. Maybe I can’t change them today or tomorrow, but I can always work towards future change.

And the most important for me of all - gratitude. I’m finding that if I apply gratitude to thoughts and actions throughout the day, very little if anything can shake me now. It feels like a superhuman power. Motorist cuts me up… meh.. at least I’m not in a hurry like that guy. Grumpy because I had a bad night sleep… I’m thankful I had a warm bed and roof over my head and warm shower to jump in. Injured myself running… at least I have legs to run. The effect of the above on my life has been profound. My happiness levels are through the roof and I’m achieving and doing things I never thought possible as I’m not allowing negative emotions and thoughts any space in my life.

Not saying this will work for anyone else, but it does for me.

Re: Life lessons from the death bed

#20

Why would I optimize my entire life for a few minutes at the end of it. That makes no sense at all.

That's not the point at all. The dying people described here were just more honest in their last moments. The lady who couldn't have one friend among her family because of her wealth, the old bitter man who couldn't process losing his wife - they suffered for decades. Possibly because of their own decisions. They did not have some bad last minutes, they had some bad last decades, and then minutes of reckoning.
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