Anxious brains redirect emotion regulation • Hacker News Board

Re: Anxious brains redirect emotion regulation

#31

Post by HKH2 » Mon, Aug 21, 2023, 6:19 AM UTC

jh00ker wrote: post #16

xyzelement wrote: post #9

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Spot on. This hit me a few weeks ago when I was considering a long workout class ln Peloton. I was hesitant to hit the start button because it was late, I was tired, etc. Then I realized that it was genuinely harder to hit play than to actually do the class. Literally I've done thousands of workouts and have never regretted one, yet every time there's this negotiation to not do it. I am connecting that to your "reali…

This book by David Burns [1] taught me that ACTION comes first, AND THEN motivation arrives. If you lay there and wait to be motivated, it will never happen. Specifically: 1. Action 2. Results 3. Motivation 4. Repeat! Anti-pattern: 1. Motivation 2. Action 3. Results 4. Does not work When I notice myself using self-talk like "ugh, I just don't feel like it" I thing of A-R-M and it helps. 1: https://amzn.to/3shnZlg

> This book by David Burns [1] taught me that ACTION comes first, AND THEN motivation arrives.

Existence precedes essence?

Re: Anxious brains redirect emotion regulation

#32

Post by Tistron » Mon, Aug 21, 2023, 6:25 AM UTC

The language of this is challenging for me to read and understand. Is there any clarity on whether high anxiety leads to this different routing, or whether there has been some event in the past leading to this routing which then leads to high anxiety? And is there any indication whether exposure to feared situations will lessen anxiety after this difference in routing is in place?

Re: Anxious brains redirect emotion regulation

#33

Post by m463 » Mon, Aug 21, 2023, 6:32 AM UTC

jh00ker wrote: post #16

xyzelement wrote: post #9

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Spot on. This hit me a few weeks ago when I was considering a long workout class ln Peloton. I was hesitant to hit the start button because it was late, I was tired, etc. Then I realized that it was genuinely harder to hit play than to actually do the class. Literally I've done thousands of workouts and have never regretted one, yet every time there's this negotiation to not do it. I am connecting that to your "reali…

This book by David Burns [1] taught me that ACTION comes first, AND THEN motivation arrives. If you lay there and wait to be motivated, it will never happen. Specifically: 1. Action 2. Results 3. Motivation 4. Repeat! Anti-pattern: 1. Motivation 2. Action 3. Results 4. Does not work When I notice myself using self-talk like "ugh, I just don't feel like it" I thing of A-R-M and it helps. 1: https://amzn.to/3shnZlg

I'm assuming the above affiliate link is the book Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy by Dr. David Burns

https://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-New-Mood-Therapy/dp/0380...

Re: Anxious brains redirect emotion regulation

#34

Post by jjallen » Mon, Aug 21, 2023, 6:49 AM UTC

impulser_ wrote: post #13

So from my understanding. Anxious people are so anxious that they overload the part of the brain that typical deals with anxiety so the brain routes it to another part of the brain to deal with it and that part of the brain isn't what you want dealing with it so it cause problems. So the key is too limit overloading the part of the brain that deals with anxiety, which probably means doing things you are fearing to do…

What if there are things we are fearing to do but shouldn’t be doing also?

Re: Anxious brains redirect emotion regulation

#35

Post by lionkor » Mon, Aug 21, 2023, 6:52 AM UTC

jjallen wrote: post #34

impulser_ wrote: post #13

So from my understanding. Anxious people are so anxious that they overload the part of the brain that typical deals with anxiety so the brain routes it to another part of the brain to deal with it and that part of the brain isn't what you want dealing with it so it cause problems. So the key is too limit overloading the part of the brain that deals with anxiety, which probably means doing things you are fearing to do…

What if there are things we are fearing to do but shouldn’t be doing also?

Then usually you shouldnt have a need to do them, and if you feel like you do, that might be the problem to address.

Re: Anxious brains redirect emotion regulation

#36

Post by mindwok » Mon, Aug 21, 2023, 6:55 AM UTC

NayamAmarshe wrote: post #27

mindwok wrote: post #25

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As an anxious person with people-pleasing tendencies, something I've been trying to focus on is reframing the situation and removing fear entirely. For me, fundamentally the fear of social interactions comes from the fear I'm going to do something wrong, that person will react badly, and I'll feel bad about myself. I've realised this entire calculus is broken, because you feel good or bad based on people's reactions…

> Instead, I'm trying to focus on feeling good or bad based on my intentions, and seeing people's reactions as merely a feedback loop to better align my actions with my intentions. This is the way. People might disagree, but I've noticed that our intentions really do influence the outcomes because our intentions affect the way we approach problems (Kinda like Wave function collapse). My world is a mere reflection of…

Yes, I completely agree. Instead of being upset with outcomes (like how people react to me in interactions), there's three things I've been trying to instead focus on: Am I at peace with my core values? Do my intentions align with those values? And finally, do my actions align with those intentions. If something bad has happened, and those three questions are a 'yes', then you have no reason to feel bad because you've been completely true to yourself and this occurence is something outside your control. If it's a 'no', then you probably need to do some reflection and figure out where in that chain something is going wrong.

Re: Anxious brains redirect emotion regulation

#37

Post by dag11 » Mon, Aug 21, 2023, 7:07 AM UTC

throwing_away wrote: post #26

abarkasxa wrote: post #19

have agoraphobia pretty bad. I've spent so much time trying to work on exposure, but then I'll have a huge panic attack, I don't have access to my frontal cortex to reason through it, during this time I'm feeling the immensity of the universe, I feel electricity running through my body, at the end of it all when I get somewhere "safe" I'm not able to think straight or sleep well for months. So yeah the impulse to avo…

> Agoraphobia involves fearing and avoiding places or situations that might cause panic and feelings of being trapped, helpless or embarrassed. You may fear an actual or upcoming situation. For example, you may fear using public transportation, being in open or enclosed spaces, standing in line, or being in a crowd. Wait, do I have agoraphobia now? I thought we were still supposed to be avoiding indoor spaces and cro…

I wouldn't say avoiding others during a pandemic is agoraphobia, it's a rational response. But after a society has largely resumed dense public activities, it's only possibly a phobia if you've formed a personal preference to partake based on your own risk/reward tolerance yet find yourself anxious to do so.

Re: Anxious brains redirect emotion regulation

#38

Post by prawn » Mon, Aug 21, 2023, 7:12 AM UTC

NayamAmarshe wrote: post #5

It's always fear, isn't it? We're afraid to approach people, afraid to ask for help, afraid that someone might react in the worst possible way or something really bad might happen. But obviously, it never happens the way we imagine. Reality is 100% of the time, different from our imagination and yet, many of us still fail to remember that. Every good opportunity that I ever got, was from me coming out of my comfort z…

Always comes back to uncertainty. The things we avoid have somewhat unpredictable outcomes. Fear of calling someone: who will answer, will they resent the interruption. Fear of submitting work: is it what they wanted, is it good enough. Avoiding starting a creative job for a client: am I taking the right tack, am I wasting my time?

Re: Anxious brains redirect emotion regulation

#39

Post by xboxnolifes » Mon, Aug 21, 2023, 7:19 AM UTC

impulser_ wrote: post #13

So from my understanding. Anxious people are so anxious that they overload the part of the brain that typical deals with anxiety so the brain routes it to another part of the brain to deal with it and that part of the brain isn't what you want dealing with it so it cause problems. So the key is too limit overloading the part of the brain that deals with anxiety, which probably means doing things you are fearing to do…

> So the key is too limit overloading the part of the brain that deals with anxiety, which probably means doing things you are fearing to do so that you no longer fear doing it.

Which is pretty much the go-to advise for a lot of people with anxiety as far as I'm aware.

Re: Anxious brains redirect emotion regulation

#40

Post by sergioisidoro » Mon, Aug 21, 2023, 7:19 AM UTC

I wonder if this shift of processing areas is behind the the "detachment" or "depersonalisation" (feeling like you're in autopilot, or not being you) that seems to be a common response to high anxiety.