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Couples with joint checking accounts are happier

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Re: Couples with joint checking accounts are happier

#11

Post by paulryanrogers »

dugmartin wrote: post #5

I don't understand couples that keep separate finances. When you get married its "we" and not "me". It seems like keeping one foot out the door. Note: I've been married for 23 years with everything tracked in joint accounts the entire time but we do have a small "fun money" monthly budget item for each of us that is a black box.

It can make inheritance simpler in some cases. And if the other person develops into an asshole (not that anyone plans to) then it can also be simpler when it comes time to part ways.

Re: Couples with joint checking accounts are happier

#12

Post by dryanau »

itsmemattchung wrote: post #2

Wife and I have been together for 8+ years and finances is still the #1 area we struggle with (more than sex, more than children), an area we are actively working on improving. When we first had our hiccups, someone suggested we divide our finances as such: - A shared account (shared expenses) - An account (for my eyes only; buy whatever - no questions asked) - An account (for her eyes only; buy whatever - no questio…

May I ask what specifically some of the issues have been? I know it's digging into a personal area so feel free to ignore this, but I'm curious what kind of issues can arise.

Re: Couples with joint checking accounts are happier

#14

Post by hooverd »

I can see the abstract but can't access the article. PDF?

Anyways, my wife and I have been happy with contributing to a joint account for expenses but keeping our checking accounts separate.

Also couples with joint social media are notably not happier according to my very unscientific observations.

Re: Couples with joint checking accounts are happier

#15

Post by jrm4 »

Seems obvious.

Though, I think a lot of people here think the takeaway is "if you're in a relationship and you do separate now, you'll be happier if you put them together" and NO NO NO that's not it at all.

It's "if y'all were already the type to put them together, you're probably happier than the types who didn't."

Re: Couples with joint checking accounts are happier

#16

Post by pseudosavant »

gabereiser wrote: post #4

All of my personal experience with this points to the opposite. Both my parents kept separate bank accounts and had one joint one for bills. I decided to follow the articles advice and simplify to just one and it was the worst divorce my attorney had ever seen. YMMV. Also, if you entangle your personal finances, I wouldn’t say “staying together” is what your doing, it’s more you are now trapped into supporting the ot…

Joint accounts, yes. Only joint accounts, no way. Your parents were right. I wish I had done it that way.

Re: Couples with joint checking accounts are happier

#17

Post by mlinhares »

pilgrim0 wrote: post #13

Or maybe it is happy couples that have joint accounts, uh?

That seems very much to be the case given the comments here, all the comments that think joint accounts are bad seem to be people that ended up being divorced so the marriage itself wasn't going well.

I can see how a bad relationship is going to get worse with mixed finances.

Re: Couples with joint checking accounts are happier

#18

Post by smabie »

dugmartin wrote: post #5

I don't understand couples that keep separate finances. When you get married its "we" and not "me". It seems like keeping one foot out the door. Note: I've been married for 23 years with everything tracked in joint accounts the entire time but we do have a small "fun money" monthly budget item for each of us that is a black box.

What if one person has significantly more money than the other person? Prenups exist for a reason

Re: Couples with joint checking accounts are happier

#19

Post by beachy »

For people who will not get divorced this is a good idea (as long as each has some slush money).

For people who will get divorced this is a bad idea.

For people who might go either way, if you come into the relationship with similar amounts of wealth and no kids, then this is a good idea as everything you make going forward is a result of your partnership, no longer just you yourself.

For people who might go either way and who come into a relationship with a wide disparity in wealth or existing kids it is more complex.

Re: Couples with joint checking accounts are happier

#20

Post by Scubabear68 »

I think this strongly depends on the couple.

My wife and I have had separate checking accounts for 20 years, and a shared savings account, and a second shared checking account we use strictly for transferring money back and forth (we can’t use savings for that due to stupid banking rules).

We also have split the hills according to our relative incomes. I make a lot more so I have the mortgage and a few big ticket items, she has several of the other bills plus her own car payment.

We make joint decisions on big things like vacations, or more recently, private school for our kids.

I know other couples do it completely differently. Some have totally shared accounts. I know husbands on a strict allowance.

Do what works for you.

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