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Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

awesomekling.github.io

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Re: Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

#171

Post by haswell »

tiffanyg wrote: post #150
wccrawford wrote: post #4

Life is about taking risk. We make daily decisions that involve big and small risk constantly. Choosing to enjoy life today instead of waiting for tomorrow for that enjoyment isn't a failure , it's a choice. It comes with risk and tradeoffs. Everyone thinks there's a magical line that everyone else should take that straddles that line between enjoyment today and tomorrow. That lines doesn't exist, and isn't even the…

There's a hack that solves "the problem" in general: "non-judgment". We get so inculcated with comparing, contrasting, thinking about "better", "not as good as", "worse" ... it's THE recipe for all manner of negative psychological states, emotions, etc. There are basic biological drives, of course, but both implicitly and explicitly we are taught minute-by-minute, starting from not long after birth, to JUDGE EVERYTHI…

Everything you wrote here resonates pretty deeply. And as a child of fundamental religion, these judgements were not just social, but existential.

My path to something better has been Sam Harris’ Waking Up app, as well as exploring the Dzogchen analytical framework for exploring the ways we constantly engage in this labeling/judging was mind bending and eye opening (a guy named James Low does a talk titled “Everything as it is” that unlocked some things in my brain).

I feel the same way about this - it’s a gift. Nearing 40 and experiencing relief from lifelong struggles with painful patterns of thought for the first time. These are ideas worth exploring, and are all solidly grounded in rational thought, which was something I mistakenly thought I’d have to leave behind to explore this kind of contemplative path.

Re: Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

#172

Post by aeyes »

xorvoid wrote: post #102

I’m continually struck by how brave Andreas is for talking about his addiction problems out in public. In most every interview he leads with it when he could just easily say a vague: “I found myself with a lot of free time”. Addiction can come with a LOT of shame baggage. To embrace vulnerability over it is quite substantial. Thank you Andreas for being a positive example for the world! Keep up the great work!

It can be a psychological trick you are playing on yourself by just putting it out there in public. Lots of people now know about it so you don't want to let them down by misstepping again.

In a way it's a form of holding yourself accountable.

I'm not sure how rehab works but I guess the first thing you need to do is to admit that you have a problem. And then you need to find ways to prevent yourself from giving in.

Re: Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

#173

Post by tobr »

SanderNL wrote: post #117

I found it interesting to learn about the etymology of the word "character". It comes to us from Latin which took it from the Greek (χᾰρᾰκτήρ) which comes from kharasso (χαράσσω) - I scratch or engrave . Our character can be thought of as the result of a long process of engraving or scratching. I tend to see it as a solid metal shield full of scratches from long battles. The resulting grooves tend towards virtue or v…

Funny that you bring this up. Just the other day I looked uo the etymology of “character” vs “caricature”. Surprisingly, considering the close similarity both in meaning and sound, they are completely unrelated. You already described “character”; “caricature” apparently comes from Italian for “load” or “exaggerate”, and is related to English “charge”.

Re: Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

#174

Post by taeric »

unmole wrote: post #158
taeric wrote: post #74

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Indeed, walking punches way over expectations for keeping weight off. You have to do a good hour of a walk, but an hour walking is probably better than a rushed workout of similar time.

> but an hour walking is probably better than a rushed workout of similar time. How so?

I honestly don't know how/why. https://www.nbcnews.com/better/health/why-walking-most-under... is one of the first search results in "benefits of walking vs gym" and there is no shortage there.

It could be as simple as you are less likely to indulge in a treat after a walk?

Re: Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

#175

Post by erikpukinskis »

ilrwbwrkhv wrote: post #132
xorvoid wrote: post #102

I’m continually struck by how brave Andreas is for talking about his addiction problems out in public. In most every interview he leads with it when he could just easily say a vague: “I found myself with a lot of free time”. Addiction can come with a LOT of shame baggage. To embrace vulnerability over it is quite substantial. Thank you Andreas for being a positive example for the world! Keep up the great work!

I think if more people were vulnerable, the world would be a kinder place. I also wish more CEOs were vulnerable. They are forced to "show strength" and "not complain" especially if they are a billionaire. But it would really show how much their lives are a mixed bag and we all face challenges and try to figure it out.

> They are forced to "show strength" and "not complain"

I wonder about this. Sometimes I think that is the job of a CEO: to put on a good face and keep and maintain “The Plan Is Gonna Work” vibes.

Every CEO I’ve worked under—no matter how compassionate they were on a personal level—has had a policy of absolutely crushing voices of dissent. Maybe not immediately, but within a couple quarters. At least when the dissent was regarding things that the CEO felt were not something they could address on the current roadmap.

I’ve come to appreciate that this attitude may be necessary… that companies (with headcounts in the 50-500 range at least) cannot afford to have some of their people pulling in a different direction than their roadmap. And that people who will do that must be excised.

But your comment makes me wonder… is that the only way? I think maybe a company like Valve lets their employees pull in different directions, and also then just allows them to be starved of resources. Which maybe is effectively the same? Or maybe is an innovation on the standard CEO model?

Re: Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

#176

Post by crdrost »

300bps wrote: post #80
wccrawford wrote: post #4

Life is about taking risk. We make daily decisions that involve big and small risk constantly. Choosing to enjoy life today instead of waiting for tomorrow for that enjoyment isn't a failure , it's a choice. It comes with risk and tradeoffs. Everyone thinks there's a magical line that everyone else should take that straddles that line between enjoyment today and tomorrow. That lines doesn't exist, and isn't even the…

OP's take on this resonated with me deeply. Throughout my life I've held the belief that, "I generally choose the right path." That's helped me in five decades of life to never be overweight, never smoke cigarettes, never do an illicit drug, etc. Your take on this topic does not come across as helpful or beneficial to me: First, in the moment, be conscious of what the risks are, and if they are worth it. If they aren…

That's awesome!

I don't really know anything about physiology or nutrition, but when you learn physics you do have to learn about the difference between simple linear systems and complex feedback networks, and then you see the Metabolic Pathways chart[1] and that proves that we are the latter, a complex feedback network.

One lesson about complex systems is that you don't change them by finding something “wrong” and “fixing it”, in the traditional sense. The problem is that there was a feedback loop keeping it that way and whatever you did just enabled that feedback loop to work harder at fighting your change. The weight-loss interpretation of this would be the failure of fad diets, I guess?

What you do instead is that you find a way to pin the output out of its range and then work backwards, or disconnect an input or so. “I need to live a life without sweets,” sounds like it was your disconnected input.

A second lesson about the complex system is that for the one thing to change, everything must change. All of the feedback loops that kept the system in state 1 need to reconfigure and reorganize themselves to accept state 2. Which means there's a period of breakage, one could even call “mourning,” where the system has not yet managed to reconfigure itself and limps along trying to get the new thing going. You just wanted a cleaner house, but in order to get it done it turned out to not require haphazard two hours cleaning sessions, no. Instead you needed to start waking up at 7 AM to have the time to empty the dishwasher before you go to work so that your spouse, who will forget about the dishwasher if it is not left open and inviting, can put the kids’ dishes in it, this causes a chain reaction where the kitchen countertops are not covered with dirty dishes so that becomes the natural room for the kids to draw in when they come home from school, which leads to them choosing to do their own homework, which leads to them having time at the end of the day to clean up, which allows everybody to go to bed early in a clean house... which is the ONLY reason you can, night owl though you are, get up at 7AM to empty the damn dishwasher. Everything had to reorganize to accomplish the goal and that took chaos and difficulty.

1. https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Human_Metabolism_-_P...

Re: Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

#177

Post by nwienert »

I think the new generation of weight-loss drugs are going to be a revolution because they give you power over bad habits, wholesale.

ICYMI: https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2023/05/ozempic-a...

Anecdotally, they really work. It’s not just your food cravings that are mostly stopped in their tracks. But in some miraculous fashion it seems all your “bad” cravings are squashed, while your good ones (side projects, chores, work) stay intact. The only good one I can see slightly down is sex, but as well with that it does also feel like you have a lot more control in that area.

I think we’ll eventually see them as first line prescriptions for all types of addicts. It’s part of the reason I sort of want to throw some money into their stock, but then again it’s hard to know how that all turns out as multiple manufacturers have these drugs and there are many more analogues in the pipelines.

But I find it so interesting, as it really upsets my notion of morality. Yes, resisting your temptations without drugs seems like the obvious better world. But our modern world is simply overflowing with temptation. Fast food, advertisements, sugar in everything, caffeine in everything, drugs everywhere. It was far easier to be ascetic when there just wasn’t that much around. But suddenly on one of these drugs you feel… powerful, in a way. Like you’ve gained a superpower. It’s a really weird experience, and I don’t hate it.

Re: Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

#178

Post by EugeneOZ »

akprasad wrote: post #119
SanderNL wrote: post #117

I found it interesting to learn about the etymology of the word "character". It comes to us from Latin which took it from the Greek (χᾰρᾰκτήρ) which comes from kharasso (χαράσσω) - I scratch or engrave . Our character can be thought of as the result of a long process of engraving or scratching. I tend to see it as a solid metal shield full of scratches from long battles. The resulting grooves tend towards virtue or v…

For a similar idea from another culture, see the ancient definitions of karma : Now as a man is like this or like that, according as he acts and according as he behaves, so will he be; a man of good acts will become good, a man of bad acts, bad; he becomes pure by pure deeds, bad by bad deeds; And here they say that a person consists of desires, and as is his desire, so is his will; and as is his will, so is his deed…

oligarchs who were killing, stealing, raping and betraying their whole lives, now are laughing on this joke so hard, on their super-yachts.

Re: Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

#179

Post by Zetice »

zackmorris wrote: post #159

IMHO there's a level of understanding beyond this, which might be called grace. I identify as a lifelong failure, but I no longer place blame on specifics like addiction or body weight or relationship issues. The truth of my existence is that the world is really messed up, but also beautiful despite the dysfunction. And I'm grateful for the adversity which woke me out of the fantasies which distracted me throughout s…

This ideology takes a good idea and pushes it too far. There isn’t a lot of value in seriously considering oneself as a “failure”, and rarely is it actually true.

Perspective to recognize the lack of any such way to measure outcomes so booleanly is probably more valuable than choosing to adopt failure as your default state.

Re: Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

#180

Post by johnnyworker »

SanderNL wrote: post #117

I found it interesting to learn about the etymology of the word "character". It comes to us from Latin which took it from the Greek (χᾰρᾰκτήρ) which comes from kharasso (χαράσσω) - I scratch or engrave . Our character can be thought of as the result of a long process of engraving or scratching. I tend to see it as a solid metal shield full of scratches from long battles. The resulting grooves tend towards virtue or v…

> I know of no more encouraging fact than the ability of a man to elevate his life by conscious endeavor. It is something to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so make a few objects beautiful. It is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look. This morally we can do.

-- Henry David Thoreau

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