51–60 of 446 posts
It made me think that there must be a kind of cycle in human societies, where certain social values (like the ones mentioned in the article) are able to become popular for a short period of time (which can be over a century long) but ultimately have no ability to sustain themselves and then are outcompeted. The amount of “defectors” isn’t enough to sustain the population.
Given how difficult it seems for any genuinely universal cultural movement to take off in the dating space, it seems to me like a similar thing will happen over the course of the 21st and 22nd centuries.
This is a known issue but the down stream effect won’t be felt for a while. Let’s be clear we’re talking about general behavioral trend, not trying to police an individual, which is the crux of contention for these topics. Many women still hold on to the idea of finding a partner that is wealthier and more educated. This is due to the past (over)reliance of their partners for stability. But this is no longer true. Th…
I'm not sure this is absolutely true - at least for Germany. Here the figures show, that women and men, ceteris paribus, earn pretty much the same (+-3%). Until... children come into the mix. The lack of child care and societies view on parental leave (for men at least) means, that generally speaking the woman stays home to take care of the child and later on moves on to a part time position thus earning less and having to rely on the partners income again.
To speak frankly, what are women doing with all this supposed surplus of education? I don't exactly see turning tides in terms of women beginning to dominate markets or leadership positions because they're starting businesses and startups and taking over boards and middle management positions. Anecdotally, I've seen these single women, they're all waiting until they're past their 20s to find a partner and they expect…
> they're all waiting until they're past their 20s to find a partner and they expect them all to be complete people by the time they meet them. I'm in my 30s and never married. I fully expect someone to come as a full person with an education and career. I am beyond glad that I didn't get married to my high school sweet heart or someone I dated in my early 20s when I was still a kid. I am nothing like I was when I wa…
My parents talked about how when they were married 'they were just kids' even though they married in their mid 20s.
I wonder if this trend of marriages happening more into the late 20s to early 30s has a large source from the difficulty of obtaining financial stability, and additionally if it is part of the causes of the US low fertility rate.
Would we still wait to mid/late 20s to get serious if all else were equal but the financial stability to buy a house etc. were there as easily as it was for previous generations?
Towards the end, the article posits that the reason men fail to attain higher levels of education is video games. I would be curious to see how the effect of video games stacks up against the effect of the significant support industry established for helping girls succeed in STEM while comparable support for boys is nonexistent.
https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2021/11/08/whats-beh...
> Men are more likely than women to point to factors that have more to do with personal choice. Roughly a third (34%) of men without a bachelor’s degree say a major reason they didn’t complete college is that they just didn’t want to. Only one-in-four women say the same. Non-college-educated men are also more likely than their female counterparts to say a major reason they don’t have a four-year degree is that they didn’t need more education for the job or career they wanted (26% of men say this vs. 20% of women).
> Women (44%) are more likely than men (39%) to say not being able to afford college is a major reason they don’t have a bachelor’s degree. Men and women are about equally likely to say needing to work to help support their family was a major impediment.
> In some instances, the gender gaps in the reasons for not completing college are more pronounced among White adults than among Black or Hispanic adults. About four-in-ten White men who didn’t complete four years of college (39%) say a major reason for this is that they just didn’t want to. This compares with 27% of White women without a degree. Views on this don’t differ significantly by gender for Black or Hispanic adults.
https://www.stlouisfed.org/on-the-economy/2022/mar/why-women...
> In this blog post, we argue against these explanations, showing it is unlikely that the gender gap in college attendance reflects some sort of failure on the part of educators or college admissions officers. A more likely explanation is that the labor markets reward women with relatively higher financial returns to college enrollment.
What I find interesting and I am curious if these conversations can happen anymore. I no longer discuss anything related to gender, relationships, or personal life dynamics with anyone outside of my bubble. I would enjoy the conversation, learning about another's ideas and understanding although despite assurances of maturity and openness conversation ends due to their inflammatory pronouncements. I do not believe id…
To speak frankly, what are women doing with all this supposed surplus of education? I don't exactly see turning tides in terms of women beginning to dominate markets or leadership positions because they're starting businesses and startups and taking over boards and middle management positions. Anecdotally, I've seen these single women, they're all waiting until they're past their 20s to find a partner and they expect…
> they're all waiting until they're past their 20s to find a partner and they expect them all to be complete people by the time they meet them. I'm in my 30s and never married. I fully expect someone to come as a full person with an education and career. I am beyond glad that I didn't get married to my high school sweet heart or someone I dated in my early 20s when I was still a kid. I am nothing like I was when I wa…
My point is that people are deluding themselves into this idea that you need to be a finished person before finding a partner.
You will grow together and effect one another. And if you're a committed partner, you'll build each other up.
If you think hard times are a limit for you personally and divorce is always an option in regular everyday struggles, you're going to face some real hard realities one day when you realize options that you had are no longer available while life passes you by.
This is a known issue but the down stream effect won’t be felt for a while. Let’s be clear we’re talking about general behavioral trend, not trying to police an individual, which is the crux of contention for these topics. Many women still hold on to the idea of finding a partner that is wealthier and more educated. This is due to the past (over)reliance of their partners for stability. But this is no longer true. Th…
I read a book awhile ago called Shall the Religious Inherit the Earth? , which basically argues that cultures which strongly promote traditional values, having children, etc. will evolutionarily outcompete groups that don’t. It made me think that there must be a kind of cycle in human societies, where certain social values (like the ones mentioned in the article) are able to become popular for a short period of time…
?????
Dating culture is substantially different than a decade ago.
I mean the research is nice, but I don't think that just a degree is going to up your chances. As someone who is using these apps constantly, I don't have any hope of finding a long term partner on there. I am on pretty much every app, except Tinder (Bumble, Hinge, okcupid, pof and even muzmatch (im south asian)). I have a bachelors, and I make good money. I've been told that I am a decent looking guy and I have quit…
It’s also about the illusion of choice and “settling” for worse. When you know there are attractive Harvard lawyers, why would you bother with some state school government worker? Now there’s no guarantee these women can actually land the first group but why not try?
As rational actors maximizing their utility, that’s the right move. The real question is what utility entails for that individual. But the default norm is by school and job prestige alongside physical looks.