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The Wait Until 8th pledge

waituntil8th.org

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Re: The Wait Until 8th pledge

#91

Post by elzbardico »

tempestn wrote: post #69
lynx23 wrote: post #62

Ah, so you need to "bind together" to be able to make decisions these days? How is this going to go down with your kids? At first, you say no? If they ask enough, you explain "you know, there is this church of parents which has decided that no kid is supposed to get a smartphone that early. Sorry kids, we can not do anything about it, it is the curch of parents decision" OK, so you can only hope your kid is rather du…

The point is that it would suck to be the one kid in grade 6 or 7 that doesn't have a phone. If parents collaborate on waiting until a healthy age - ideally if it becomes a societal norm - then kids don't need to feel left out.

Pretty soon, we, responsible parents who actually set up parental controls correctly, pay attention to what our kids are doing and have actual, consistent, and transparent limits will be shamed for giving our kids access to tech by a bunch of neo-hippie Luddite Karens.

Re: The Wait Until 8th pledge

#92

Post by scrollaway »

r2vcap wrote: post #73

Giving a smartphone to a child is creating a lot of problems. In Korea, many parents play YouTube videos to their whining children, and many wonder if this is contributing to the rise in ADHD in children. Parents and the government must make a decision before a bigger social problem arises.

If everyone has ADHD, is it really a disorder anymore?

I say this because I have ADHD. Diagnosed very late, because it never bothered me… I just used it to my advantage all my life and I never understood how people can spend years in the same place with the same job. That, to me, sounds like the real sickness.

I learned more about it since and of course there’s a spectrum to it, but still.

ADHD is no doubt the #1 factor why I’m able to have the career I have, the life I have. And I’m very happy there.

Re: The Wait Until 8th pledge

#93

Post by scrollaway »

wwilim wrote: post #86
tripdout wrote: post #48

Hard disagree. My first phone was an iPod Touch in Grade 4, and by Grade 5 I had already jailbroken it with one of my friends. By Grade 6, I built my own computer, got a phone with data, and by Grade 7 was running Linux on my desktop computer, which I used in Grade 8 to compile an Android ROM from source. I'm now an intern for an Android app development company. If I didn't get a phone until Grade 8, not only would I…

Aren't you a bit of an outlier though?

Let’s make more outliers instead of ignoring them and turning them into casualties.

Re: The Wait Until 8th pledge

#94

Post by xeyownt »

elzbardico wrote: post #72

This is the easy way out of the problem, but I am afraid, not the correct one. My kid has had his own tablet since 6, his own PC since 8, and his own cellular since 9. So far he hasn't turned into a domestic terrorist, and neither is he selling heroin for crypto on the dark web. Also, he has specific times when he can use his devices аnd limits on how much time. All modern OSes have some sort of parental controls bui…

100% agree. Whatever you decide, supervision and guidance is the best you can do to your kids. I guess it's easier to remove the plug and pretend kids are safe when disconnected.

Re: The Wait Until 8th pledge

#95

Post by hammyhavoc »

bobsmooth wrote: post #85
sillysaurusx wrote: post #56

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I was watching gore videos when I was 13. I bet lots of others were too. I turned out ok. Survivorship bias isn’t a great way to make an argument, but I’m skeptical of the view that the internet is so much worse now. There isn’t even a liveleak anymore. A family friend was groomed at 9yo. She was pressured into sending nude pics of herself to a 15yo. That kind of thing seems like the real danger for unsuspecting kids…

>I turned out ok. You sure? I was also a young child on the internet and I think it made me an antisocial shut in that wasn't able to relate to his peers.

Have you been screened for autism et al? I used to believe this until I found out I was autistic, which went unnoticed as a kid due to being very wordy, and instead only had my ADHD diagnosed.

Re: The Wait Until 8th pledge

#96

Post by annie_muss »

I sincerely hope this works.

I am a full blown screen addict. Screens and devices have basically been my life since I was very young. It's too late for me but I hope interventions and support while people are young will give them the skills and abilities to manage computer and device usage effectively when they grow older.

Re: The Wait Until 8th pledge

#97

Post by DoreenMichele »

Playing outdoors, spending time with friends, reading books and hanging out with family is happening a lot less to make room for hours of snap chatting, instagramming, and catching up on You Tube.

I'm pretty sure cause and effect run the other way. The world has changed in a lot of ways and the internet gives people a constructive outlet to fill the void.

Average number of children per household has dropped steadily over several generations. This means not only fewer siblings but fewer aunts, uncles and cousins. There are knock on effects from there that help make it less safe to play outdoors in a lot of places, family less available, etc.

Re: The Wait Until 8th pledge

#98

Post by larusso »

flangola7 wrote: post #70
gls2ro wrote: post #40

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Kids brain and adult brain are different. The same goes for body - this is why some medicine cannot be taken by kids. As an example (I am not a doctor) the neocortex is not fully developed until maybe 20s. Thus what works for you as an adult is not 100% sure to be working for children.

I'm not talking about adult brains. I was on YouTube and Reddit as a child too, why would I think it would effect them more as a kid and not me? I remember watching Rebecca Black's Friday in middle school on my Samsung Galaxy and shitposting the video on unrelated subreddits until mods banned me. Yeah it was stupid but I don't think it's the end of the world.

Too be fair. As a parent you can only screw up. Either like me trying to control the flow of stupid information or by not giving the kids any control.

My decision come from my own experience with my own media usage. I think back in the days there was a natural stop. Like cartoons only aired in the afternoon or on Saturday. There been time slices when one where able to enjoy a specific medium. Hell even stuff like porn came in limited doses for normal people. But today? My kids could watch cartoons for the nexts month without a pause.

I saw this in myself at around 2018 when scrolling threw Facebook at traffic lights etc. I thought to myself what the hell are you doing? So I deleted the app from my phone and 6 month later the whole account.

Re: The Wait Until 8th pledge

#99

Post by hammyhavoc »

tripdout wrote: post #48

Hard disagree. My first phone was an iPod Touch in Grade 4, and by Grade 5 I had already jailbroken it with one of my friends. By Grade 6, I built my own computer, got a phone with data, and by Grade 7 was running Linux on my desktop computer, which I used in Grade 8 to compile an Android ROM from source. I'm now an intern for an Android app development company. If I didn't get a phone until Grade 8, not only would I…

Not to discredit anything you said, but people get internships with zero prior experience because they're frequently incentivized to offer them. Your comment isn't making much of a compelling argument other than an n+1 anecdote.

Re: The Wait Until 8th pledge

#100

Post by gnicholas »

jeffrallen wrote: post #53

We always told our kid, "you'll get a phone when you need a phone", which was a message that was supposed to communicate that the phone was connected to increased freedom and increased responsibility. Then we found at 12 that the actual need was social integration, because he was being excluded from some social life without a phone at 12. So he got a phone. The curse of Metcalf's law...

That's the point of attempts to coordinate group behavior, like this site. The goal is to avoid having your kid be the only one without a smartphone, by tacitly communicating with enough other parents who have a similar goal in mind.
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