Sports. I live in a gated community. Saw some people playing Cricket. I was hesitant to ask if I could join because I hadn’t played the sports in 15 years but decided to try. Everyone was very welcoming and now I play every weekend and have made good friends. We handed a WhatsApp group where we discuss cricket matches. It’s fun.
Ask HN: Where have you found community outside of work?
421–430 of 585 posts
Re: Ask HN: Where have you found community outside of work?
#422Earlier quoted context omitted.
Yup. I joined a climbing gym. Hanging out with a lot of people both older and younger than you is refreshing. Not much shared misery though when it comes to climbing, always had a blast.
100% climbing. I think that - unlike many gyms and other fitness communities - it's very welcoming to non-conformistist and people who don't look like typical gym junkies. It's hard to have an ego when just about everyone gets outclimbed by 12yo girls, and the best climber in the world looks like someone who got fired from a big tech company because he looked too geeky: http://www.alpinist.com/doc/web16f/newswire-ond…
> I think that - unlike many gyms and other fitness communities - it's very welcoming to non-conformistist and people who don't look like typical gym junkies.
In my experience you see this quite a bit in BJJ as well. I wouldn't say it's nearly as diverse as climbing, but it's definitely not all young athletic men. My son's classes were about 4:1 boys vs girls, and the adult classes had fewer women. But I got to experience being choked out by a 70 year old man and a 16 year old wizard on the mats. There were all sorts of fitness ranges, but typically those improved rather quickly for the folks who stuck with it. We only had a couple guys who I'd put in the religiously works out strength category. Those guys are legit scary when you know they have the same skills as the skinny 70 year old who just put you through your paces and can also just physically twist you into a pretzel on top of it just through raw strength. All were super friendly and inviting to new folks though.
Re: Ask HN: Where have you found community outside of work?
#423Scuba diving - many divers are engineers of some sort and being under water for couple of hours really clears your mind for a good talk. There's also a ton of subjects to talk about as there's just so much happening under water - flora, fauna, technique etc.
Re: Ask HN: Where have you found community outside of work?
#424My neighborhood. When we moved in we sat out front every evening, and made small talk with every single person who walked by. Some were caught off guard, some kinda just waved and moved on, but most stopped to talk. What's interesting is that people who had lived in that neighborhood nearly 20 years together had never talked, and met for the first time as both stopped to chat at nearly the same time. Then we started…
I host two events. In fall, I’m the pancake breakfast guy and then in spring I’m the crawfish boil guy. I just put flyers on people’s doors before each event. I just think it’s fun and missed the sense of neighborhood community I had as a kid, had my “be the change you want” moment. My kid on the other hand gets a kick out of having everyone know his name and being a hyper local celebrity lol.
My kid would love you for the pancakes, and my wife for the crawfish boil.
Any tips/recipes for the boil? Assuming it's that cajun buttery stuff - I have to drive an hour to get some, and would love to be able to make it as good at home.
Re: Ask HN: Where have you found community outside of work?
#425A fitness community. This could be either a BJJ (Brazilian Jiu Jitsu) place or even a CrossFit gym. I've done both and while I'm not here to promote CrossFit, I am here to say that a group fitness class is awesome for meeting other people and finding a community of people that do something similar as you, but have absolutely nothing to do with your work. I workout with Police officers, Lawyers, Doctors, Dentists, Sta…
Yup. I joined a climbing gym. Hanging out with a lot of people both older and younger than you is refreshing. Not much shared misery though when it comes to climbing, always had a blast.
Also came here to say climbing (specifically bouldering). I moved to a smaller city in the south last fall and within a month had a handful of new friends through the gym. Pretty soon got in with the crew of folks who worked there, started climbing outside with some of them and eventually ended up working part time at the gym as a side thing.
That being said, I think there's something about the community at this particular gym that is special. I climbed for years at gyms in Chicago and never had anything close to the level of community I found in a couple months down here. I'm sure my attitude / situation had something to do with it, as I went in this time with the intention to make friends and had a lot of free time to be able to spend at the gym; but the gym / community makes a huge difference. Look for smaller / community focused gyms if you can or try out a few different gyms to see if you click with any particular group of people. Try to go to events the gyms put on and be a familiar face.
Re: Ask HN: Where have you found community outside of work?
#426A fitness community. This could be either a BJJ (Brazilian Jiu Jitsu) place or even a CrossFit gym. I've done both and while I'm not here to promote CrossFit, I am here to say that a group fitness class is awesome for meeting other people and finding a community of people that do something similar as you, but have absolutely nothing to do with your work. I workout with Police officers, Lawyers, Doctors, Dentists, Sta…
> There's something about "shared misery" that brings people together and builds a comrade. That turns into a community where you start to hang out with them out of the gym/etc. Agreed; my outside work community IS my martial arts community. There are the brief moments while waiting that you end up chatting with your partners. Eventually you learn what they do, if they have kids, etc. and since you see them weekly yo…
My experience with the hierarchy stuff was a lot worse in "traditional" martial arts versus something like BJJ. You've got a lot of "fake" black belts in TKD in part because it's mostly forms work and not really tested. Some sparing matches go hard, but that's rarely the case as you don't really want to be kicking with full force with your sparing partner. So the skill vs skill tests are much more limited.
In BJJ, you're typically going to be rolling with full effort. You're going to be put in a real choke hold and you're really going to go to sleep if you don't tap. We don't slam the joint locks the way you might see in a tournament setting with money on the line, but a slow and safe arm bar will work as well if you've actually got control of the limb. So for me the ranking in BJJ feels more aligned to actual ability to me than my experience with TKD did because you're getting a real test of your skills every class. The sorting feels more natural and everyone can clearly see the differences in skill play out daily.
You respect your classmates and seniors more because of your experiences rolling with them and less because it's demanded by the belt system and and built in by tradition.
Re: Ask HN: Where have you found community outside of work?
#427Earlier quoted context omitted.
That's right, we choose not to accept blood transfusions. But, "literally expect you to just die if you experience any sort of trauma." is outright wrong. We strongly value life! We spend a lot of time and resources to understand transfusion alternatives, of which there are many, and we each individually make the decisions as to what types of treatment we will accept. If you want to find out what we actually believe:…
Would JW like to outlaw transfusions? Like, do many of them believe it should be illegal, like many catholics believe birth control should be illegal?
No, we don't impose our beliefs on others, and we stay out of all politics. We respect everyone's right to choose for themselves.
Re: Ask HN: Where have you found community outside of work?
#428To find meaning in connection you have to open up and the avenues are at every point. From local walks to sports, to neighbourhoods, to hobbies. This place is community, we share ideas and exchange our views, we have the ability to express and that's how we connect.
Re: Ask HN: Where have you found community outside of work?
#429Earlier quoted context omitted.
That's right, we choose not to accept blood transfusions. But, "literally expect you to just die if you experience any sort of trauma." is outright wrong. We strongly value life! We spend a lot of time and resources to understand transfusion alternatives, of which there are many, and we each individually make the decisions as to what types of treatment we will accept. If you want to find out what we actually believe:…
Let me ask you a direct question, and I hope you'll respond directly. Lets say all of those "transfusion alternatives" demonstrably fail, and someone has two choices left: Transfuse or Die; you might phrase that as "Transfuse or Pray", but either way... ...What then? When all other options are exhausted, the prayers aren't working, and your last chance to live involves transfusions, are they permissible?
They aren't. That's where a strong future hope comes in, and the desire to follow God's laws over all else.
That doesn't make it easy, but if one truly believes something, shouldn't they be be willing to make sacrifices for it? People don't think twice about giving their life for their country, so why would somebody be any less convicted?
Re: Ask HN: Where have you found community outside of work?
#430The church is like a second family for me. I made so many great friends there! Of course it will not be for everyone, but if you are open to it you can try.
I’m not religious at all, rather agnostic, but my wife is a nonpracticing Christian. (Although I find a good sermon/pastor to be motivating, thought provoking, and just full of basic life lessons that happen to he documented in an old book).
I’m fine with the concept of the right church because of the community effects especially as a parent and wanting my kid to have as many positive role models as possible in his life; peers/adults/seniors. So after many years of being with my wife, we decided to start when my kid was 4. We actually wanted to start earlier but it’s a hard habit to just introduce, then 2020 happened, etc so here we are. It’s been quite a positive adjustment. It’s easy to see the cult and abuse headlines and write it off, but when done right I still think it’s incredibly powerful and religion as a whole is just a framework for peaceful civilization and coexistence with communities.