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The American Dream convinces people loneliness is normal

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Re: The American Dream convinces people loneliness is normal

#91

Post by shrimp_emoji »

la64710 wrote: post #40
elzbardico wrote: post #12

While I am not a fan of American Exceptionalism, I think this article is more informed by the usual European prejudiced tropes about America than by reality, at least in the parallels between the traditions of rugged individualism from the Old West and the present epidemics of loneliness. The old Cowboy was based on self-reliance, he was not a loner because he couldn't connect with people, but because his adventures…

All the American exceptionalism and associated lone hero image was fine and dandy till the west was winning in the global stage.The urban culture got imposed on every other country of the world and in this model of development it was expected people to go as far as needed from their homes and roots in search of prosperity. It was in a way encouraged for decades and at least two to four generations of these countries…

Nah. Gravity is a real drag. The asteroid belts have it all for almost zero g's, almost like someone already dug it out of the ground and threw it into space. And robots can just tug those around to your nearest habitat/spaceport/planet.

Re: The American Dream convinces people loneliness is normal

#92

Post by mlcrypto »

christophilus wrote: post #27
munk-a wrote: post #5

The modern version of the American dream is an extremely toxic ideology. It promotes such an extreme version of individualism that it's threatening to tear apart all the social safety nets still existent in the US while also glorifying excessive wealth hoarding. It is absolutely bonkers that we've gotten to the point where cheating on your taxes can be viewed as a virtue.

The US got its start at least partially due to a tax revolt, so that last bit isn’t terribly surprising.

But people forget we're getting taxed more now than the colonies did

Re: The American Dream convinces people loneliness is normal

#93

Post by latency-guy2 »

eternalban wrote: post #46

Actual source: https://apnews.com/article/loneliness-lonely-alone-surgeon-g... Actual author: https://www.google.com/search?q=TED+ANTHONY - This is a strange article. It reads like propaganda designed to demoralize and denigrate. "“Thus not only does democracy make every man forget his ancestors, but it ... throws him back forever upon himself alone, and threatens in the end to confine him entirely within the solitud…

I don't think the AP has gone fascist, I think they've gone leftist. This author appears to hate this fictional America they've invented in their mind, something lots of leftists do because they can't stand capitalism having a longevity beyond what their desired system of economic governance could ever achieve. So now it's the next best thing to take it down anyway they can, or steal the resources of America in the hopes of establishing their ideal world.

It's fascinating to study these people exert so much combined effort for complete failure. By now you'd expect some of these foolish people to give it up, but they keep writing fan fiction in the hopes of getting enough people to listen to them that they'll "revolt" as they claim.

Re: The American Dream convinces people loneliness is normal

#94

Post by t-3 »

flatline wrote: post #48
valianteffort wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Greatest decision I ever made was getting a remote gig, leaving the big city, and moving to a small town. There is enough going on here to keep busy, and everyone knows eachother. Would never dream of raising my kids somewhere like SF. If you want community, go somewhere it's valued. Everyone in the big city is a transient, only there to make money and find love before it's time to head for the suburbs.

I live in a mid-sized US city and it’s hell. Seven years in, my friend group is small - but present - and there are very few activities I enjoy. It is a sleepy kind of place. Community here forms in small pockets of people who have known each other their entire lives and are not welcoming to newcomers. I have eyed a move to SF and when I last traveled there my Airbnb host commented, “this is where you come to find co…

There's a big difference between a medium city and a small town, like an order of magnitude or three.

Re: The American Dream convinces people loneliness is normal

#95

Post by rqtwteye »

AdrianB1 wrote: post #63
rqtwteye wrote: post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It probably started with shareholder value when companies they declared that their only responsibility is to make as much money as possible. This ideology is very appealing to sociopaths so now they dominate.

You are saying this started 3-400 years ago? Then why is it visible just now?

I mean the 1980s.

Re: The American Dream convinces people loneliness is normal

#96

Post by friend_and_foe »

This problem is not the result of "rugged individualism", it is the result of government policy, deliberate design of systems in everyday use to make profit, the profitability of disease and disillusionment with the supposed normal everyday orthodoxy due to attempts to normalize unpopular things by force and propaganda.

America is very sick, and it's not the result of John Wayne movies.

Re: The American Dream convinces people loneliness is normal

#97

Post by bradlys »

t-3 wrote: post #94
flatline wrote: post #48

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I live in a mid-sized US city and it’s hell. Seven years in, my friend group is small - but present - and there are very few activities I enjoy. It is a sleepy kind of place. Community here forms in small pockets of people who have known each other their entire lives and are not welcoming to newcomers. I have eyed a move to SF and when I last traveled there my Airbnb host commented, “this is where you come to find co…

There's a big difference between a medium city and a small town, like an order of magnitude or three.

The biggest issue is that community doesn’t always find you wherever you are. You can be outgoing, well liked, and so forth but sometimes wherever you live just isn’t going to work. We have a finite lifespan - so we can’t try every sized city and multiples of each.

My experience of living in small towns (100-20,000) was miserable. Extremely racist, homophobic, xenophobic, conservative, and so forth. Could I find a small town where that’s not an issue? Maybe but they tend to be this way. If you’re already someone who doesn’t fit into most crowds - you’re not always gonna find a welcoming scene in a small town.

My experience of big cities has also not been perfect either and I’ve lived in a few. (500k-8m) But the drawbacks of small towns are mostly gone. They’re replaced with other issues like insane competition on every front. (You’re always competing for someone’s attention and time - regardless of who they are) Cities segregate heavily even if they act like melting pots. The truth is - very little intermixing happens relative to how it should theoretically be. The upside of cities though is that there are likely more pockets of people to find a community to belong to. The downside is that it brings a lot of tribalism and exclusionary behavior. (Thus the segregation)

Overall, the USA sucks. It lacks community because we’ve decided to embrace late stage capitalism and the American identity is centered around getting fucked by the feds and capitalists. It’s no surprise that rich slave owners were writing the original rules the country would be founded on - when viewing how things are now.

Re: The American Dream convinces people loneliness is normal

#99

Post by nocoiner »

supportengineer wrote: post #20
valianteffort wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Greatest decision I ever made was getting a remote gig, leaving the big city, and moving to a small town. There is enough going on here to keep busy, and everyone knows eachother. Would never dream of raising my kids somewhere like SF. If you want community, go somewhere it's valued. Everyone in the big city is a transient, only there to make money and find love before it's time to head for the suburbs.

Wow - I moved to SF, found love, and moved to the suburbs… but I’m still working on that money part :)

LOL, support group anyone???

Re: The American Dream convinces people loneliness is normal

#100

Post by dale_glass »

elzbardico wrote: post #12

While I am not a fan of American Exceptionalism, I think this article is more informed by the usual European prejudiced tropes about America than by reality, at least in the parallels between the traditions of rugged individualism from the Old West and the present epidemics of loneliness. The old Cowboy was based on self-reliance, he was not a loner because he couldn't connect with people, but because his adventures…

The old Cowboy was based on a fiction. It's an obsolete kind of farming job, not being a badass outlaw as a profession that fiction turned it into.

A real cowboy was just a guy whose job was managing cattle and moving it around as needed, not an adventurer.

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