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Why are so many young men single and sexless?

psychologytoday.com

11–20 of 230 posts

Re: Why are so many young men single and sexless?

#11

  “It's a fact...that in societies like ours sex truly represents a second system of differentiation, completely independent of money; and as a system of differentiation it functions just as mercilessly. The effects of these two systems are, furthermore, strictly equivalent. Just like unrestrained economic liberalism, and for similar reasons, sexual liberalism produces phenomena of absolute pauperization . Some men make love every day; others five or six times in their life, or never. Some make love with dozens of women; others with none. It's what's known as 'the law of the market'...Economic liberalism is an extension of the domain of the struggle, its extension to all ages and all classes of society. Sexual liberalism is likewise an extension of the domain of the struggle, its extension to all ages and all classes of society.”
― Michel Houellebecq, Extension du domaine de la lutte

Re: Why are so many young men single and sexless?

#12
> Faced with the choice between an energy-intensive, highly competitive dating environment and the low-effort rewards of porn, young men appear to be taking the path of least resistance.

Why would they?

And for thousandth time: porn addiction is a symptom, not a cause.

Re: Why are so many young men single and sexless?

#13
> Recent Pew Research indicates that over 60% of young men are currently single.

Given that the proportion and dynamics of some-sex relations makes not a big difference here, would this not imply that roughly the same percentage of young women are currently single, too?

Re: Why are so many young men single and sexless?

#14
post #7

Earlier quoted context omitted.

30s single women complain 30s men being creeps for younger girls

I haven't seen that, really. I have seen people interpreting such age gap as a sign of guys immaturity or a general red flag for "that dude is looking to take advantage of you". I have never seen the "I would date that guy but he dates younger girls" thing. Having younger partner is status symbol for a men to show off to other men. It does not make him look like good potential partner to adult women tho.

A recent example is Leonardo DiCaprio and his new partner have upset a few women on Reddit.

https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/10w8fv2/th...

Re: Why are so many young men single and sexless?

#15
post #7

Earlier quoted context omitted.

30s single women complain 30s men being creeps for younger girls

I haven't seen that, really. I have seen people interpreting such age gap as a sign of guys immaturity or a general red flag for "that dude is looking to take advantage of you". I have never seen the "I would date that guy but he dates younger girls" thing. Having younger partner is status symbol for a men to show off to other men. It does not make him look like good potential partner to adult women tho.

> It does not make him look like good potential partner to adult women tho.

I’m pretty someone who can and actively dates someone younger doesn’t care in slightest about opinion of people who are not in his priority bucket.

Re: Why are so many young men single and sexless?

#16
I mean one sure way not to have sex with someone else is to never expose yourself to situations that could lead to such a thing. As an educator I have to say that over my career there was a noticable shift in how students behave. The students I have today are more shy, more careful and more risk averse than students 4 years ago.

I could imagine that many of them would just decide to not bother at all until luck falls into their hands. But the thing about dating and getting to know people in a world where everybody pretends to be something they are not is that showing them your real you is a risk that you might not be willing to take. But if you don't ever take the risk to show them who you are really, how would you expect someone to like you for who you are?

Re: Why are so many young men single and sexless?

#17
The reality is that young men have always been “optional” in society. Biology looms large. Women seek to mate with the most high status males, evidenced by the fraction of men who get the majority of the “action” on dating apps and in life. Thus throughout history we’ve died in the wars and otherwise exist in the margins.

An example of the desparity to me is the concept “mansplaining” woke culture disparages. Some women (and others) see a man explaining something as condescension. Whereas I’ve always been grateful that anyone would take the time to educate or otherwise try to share information and gasp, try to help me?! I believe this reflects a fundamental difference in experience worth reflecting on.

Re: Why are so many young men single and sexless?

#20

"Young men must re-prioritize real-life relationships and intimacy attuned to the shift in priorities that women have already made" The priorities of women in their 20s are dating men in their 30s. This new stat and the accompanying Boomer commentary is genuinely one of the funniest memes so far in 2023. They literally don't understand the world they created for future generations.

30s single women complain 30s men being creeps for younger girls

Sour grapes?
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