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Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

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Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Take it from a serial dater male with great success on tinder/bumble.. the lives of many women is substantially worse than even guys that can't get a date. Unless you do a great job explaining the purpose of dating (courting?), There is a very high chance she'll simply become the temporary play thing of dozens of men. And being smart and well educated seems to have basically little to do with it.. I know many more ma…

That's an another angle I haven't thought about. Thank you for sharing.

[flagged]

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#22
post #5

Really troubling statistics if true. I suspect the lockdown has exacerbated this. Frankly I worry for my own young children. I almost wish there was a place to live where there was little to no social media, no chronic cell phone addiction, people out in nature, together, socializing, cooperating.

Not a comfortable thing to say, but this is one reason I’m glad my kid is a daughter and not a son If the dating game is already like this now, it’s scary thinking about how it’ll be 18 years from now

If you think the situation is any better for young women, you're in for a shock. From where I'm sitting, the propaganda targeting women is far, far more pervasive and destructive. Everything about their relationships - the why, when, who and how - is undermined in an alarming majority of our institutions.

Date many and often with no inhibitions, "have fun", don't get "tied down", delay marriage and family or abstain altogether, date men with little in common, date women, prioritise career, kids are disgusting and expensive, kids threaten your Instagram physique, pointless travelling > family, make easy money on OnlyFans, there's the psychological impact (distortion of standards) of having easy access to sex with very high quality men who would never "settle" for them in marriage, and do all of this with reckless abandon because if anyone is not enthusiastically supportive then the issue is with them not you and your sordid past.

It's little wonder so many women wake up one day, they're 38, single, childless, and depressed. The antidepressant usage among Western women is shocking.

I would argue that a very large contributing factor in our young men's disillusionment with dating is a product of the damage being done to our young women.

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#23
post #5

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not a comfortable thing to say, but this is one reason I’m glad my kid is a daughter and not a son If the dating game is already like this now, it’s scary thinking about how it’ll be 18 years from now

Take it from a serial dater male with great success on tinder/bumble.. the lives of many women is substantially worse than even guys that can't get a date. Unless you do a great job explaining the purpose of dating (courting?), There is a very high chance she'll simply become the temporary play thing of dozens of men. And being smart and well educated seems to have basically little to do with it.. I know many more ma…

majority of wealthy wives are on anti-depressants, according to a pharmacist friend who works in a wealthy zip code in North NJ.

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#25

The maths of dating never makes sense unless you make some really difficult assumptions. Reminds me of a joke from somewhere: Every happy man is single and every happy woman is married.

I have recently heard the opposite, at least as far as women goes. For a lot of women, especially mothers, being a single mother is a whole lot easier than being a married mother, since there is one less person in the house they have to take care of. A whole lot of men were not socialized to be actual contributing partners, which loops back around into the prime reason why a lot of men are having a hard time dating t…

The American Time Use Survey data suggests that when you add up hours spent on jobs and household chores, men and women work basically the same hours: https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2013/03/14/chapter...

Of course this is an average, so it's possible in some families women are working more, and in other families men are working more.

But modern political sensibilities filter those stories so that you'll only hear those confirming a certain bias (men bad), which distorts the overall picture, which is on average equal work.

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#26

Will probably get downvoted for this. But I'm a very conventionally attractive guy with a good job in a major US city. I basically have an unlimited stream of dates through dating apps from women of all walks of life. Upwards of 20 - 50 matches a day if I really push it. People already know this, but I dont think they know how bad the schew is. Every young single woman is chasing the same few men and they dont care i…

Because dating these days is about being photogenic and being in scenic places...

People who are on the Internet a lot, and people who look good on dating apps are really invested in social media, and that means finding a partner who works well with that.

Dating apps are also heavily paywalled. Communication is not facilitated at all by dating apps... It's a pretty grim future for meaningful matching to be honest. I get dates as well, but hate the feeling of meeting through an app because it feels like a revolving door of Internet faces, not like a great way to make trustworthy partners.

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#27
post #5

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not a comfortable thing to say, but this is one reason I’m glad my kid is a daughter and not a son If the dating game is already like this now, it’s scary thinking about how it’ll be 18 years from now

If you think the situation is any better for young women, you're in for a shock. From where I'm sitting, the propaganda targeting women is far, far more pervasive and destructive. Everything about their relationships - the why, when, who and how - is undermined in an alarming majority of our institutions. Date many and often with no inhibitions, "have fun", don't get "tied down", delay marriage and family or abstain…

> I would argue that a very large contributing factor in our young men's disillusionment with dating is a product of the damage being done to our young women

Can you please elaborate more on this conclusion? I agree with everything you said until that statement.

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#28

Another controversial comment but I know more and more young men deciding not to waste time pursuing dates and instead going to prostitutes.

It's only controversial in the US. Sex work is a legitimate job. We are selling our brain time on a daily basis to employer. Someone else is selling labor and cleaning the sewers. It's exactly the same thing unless you have a religious agenda.

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#30

Really troubling statistics if true. I suspect the lockdown has exacerbated this. Frankly I worry for my own young children. I almost wish there was a place to live where there was little to no social media, no chronic cell phone addiction, people out in nature, together, socializing, cooperating.

You literally just described the Amish.

With their much higher fertility rate, Amish society will probably outlast ours.
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