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Most young men are single. Most young women are not

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Re: Most young men are single. Most young women are not

#231

Post by GaryNumanVevo »

medvezhenok wrote: post #207
GaryNumanVevo wrote: post #206

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Counterpoint: Ignore any advice that uses the phrase "maximize your value in the dating market"

And reap frustration in your romantic endeavors. Look, anyone can close their eyes and believe in fairytales. The advice I gave doesn't guarantee anything - it merely increases your chances of a favorable outcome. If you have issues with the phrasing, read it as "make yourself into a more attractive partner" or however it is politically-correct to phrase the above statement.

Framing, it's the framing that's the issue here. Women can smell desperation from a mile away and this "Pick up artist" mindset will set off red flags for most.

Framing the dating world as "increas[ing] your chances of a favorable outcome" (i.e. sex) is only going to lead to disappointment.

Re: Most young men are single. Most young women are not

#232

Post by epolanski »

_z2co wrote: post #197
epolanski wrote: post #132

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Every romantic relationship involves attraction between different polarities a masculine and a feminine one. That's just how laws of attraction work in nature, regardless of the animal and we reflect that. Don't be confused though, it has nothing to do with sexual orientations and there's perfectly happy heterosexual couples where the energies are inverted: males are more emotional, nurturing and females are more det…

> Men are still attracted biologically to what will give them the most chances to procreate: young, healthy women. Speak for yourself. I'm gay as hell, and comfortable with the fact my bloodline ends with me.

Apologies, I meant it as a generalization, and as I prefaced in my post it has nothing to do with sexuality. The same phenomenon applies to any kind of romantic relationship.

Actually it's interesting you brought it up because as a member of the gay community I wonder whether you would agree or not that the different polarities are any less or more or equally evident in gay couples.

Re: Most young men are single. Most young women are not

#233

Post by attemptone »

DogLover_ wrote: post #76

Men were told that feminism is good, and the rise of women should not be a threat to them. These result shows the opposite I think.

Ah yes, my granfather still remembers the moment he was told that feminism is good. And from then on he deeply knew that the rise of women is no threat to him and his brethren. I on the other hand look at this result and long for the old days, were only the eldest son was allowed to marry and women were not allowed to vote.

Jokes aside, your view of feminism, it's history and results is very reductive. Are you talking about beauvoir, judith butler, the cyborg manifesto or more about the pop feminism that gets represented in talk shows, lifestyle and outrage yt-videos?

I'm happy that my sisters don't have to put up with people that dont treat them well just because their women. Take this with a grain of salt, I've noticed that young men generally seem not to be as emotionally mature as their female counterpart.

Re: Most young men are single. Most young women are not

#234

Post by penguin_booze »

bluetomcat wrote: post #91
wollyhood wrote: post #43

I sincerely believe that I am a respectful, reasonably attractive, healthy, financially successful and emotionally mature person. I found dating so hopelessly difficult in America, that I decided to literally learn another language and relocate to another country. I felt like I had no future in America because of that. The difference where I am now is night and day. I have had to decline more dates and advances, whic…

> They would regularly initiate conversations, share personal details of their life As a non-American, what strikes me about young American females in particular is how talkative and expressive they are. I've never talked with them in person, but I've observed young tourist groups in Europe. They can be talking trivialities about their experiences in a self-assertive way non-stop, constantly littered with "I was like…

Ah, the Great American "like" metronome; the universal connective; the default prefix to all sentences.

Re: Most young men are single. Most young women are not

#235

Post by mcphage »

b800h wrote: post #191
mcphage wrote: post #189

Earlier quoted context omitted.

So situations where women think they're in a relationship, but the man does not (or not with them). Again, is this statistically significant? Are women's standards for what qualifies as a relationship low enough that they think they're in one with 1/2, 1/3, or even less, of a man's time?

I'm willing to bet that it contributes to the total in a way which isn't negligible.

I guess, but there's a vast gulf between "isn't negligible" and "30% vs. 60%"

Re: Most young men are single. Most young women are not

#236

Post by attemptone »

ryandrake wrote: post #187
bradlys wrote: post #131

I get quite tired of the boomer-esque takes on HN and everywhere else. The quintessential one is “shower, dress, have a job, and be respectful” is somehow enough to attract just about any woman. People assume that 60% of young men must just be filthy neckbeard degenerates. As far as I can tell - this is cause they never talk to young people or meet any. Attracting young women today is an entirely different ballgame t…

I never made that connection before but you're absolutely right! The whole "just take a shower, comb your hair and dress nicely" dating advice is exactly like the "just walk up to the owner of the company and give him a firm handshake and you'll get the job!" career advice. It's coming from a place of good intentions, but from a reality that no longer exists.

Tbh a lot of men I've interacted that held borderline incel opinions could have used a shower and a fashion make-over. It woudn't get them the dream gf but it would have been a start from where to develop

Re: Most young men are single. Most young women are not

#237

Post by nradov »

houseinthesky wrote: post #71

One thing the article didn't address that would be interesting to see would be the impact of the childhood obesity epidemic. In the greatest generation, silent generation, boomers and gen X, the rates of obesity in teens and 20-somethings was a rounding error. People varied in attractiveness, but almost everyone would have been "dateable". Today, 20-30% of the young population is obese, which is going to severely res…

Yes, obesity is probably a huge factor here. Excess adipose tissue suppresses testosterone levels and is a risk factor for erectile dysfunction. Unfortunately, some of those fat young men have just lost interest, or can't get it up.

Endocrine disruptor chemicals such as pthalates also seem to be part of the problem.

https://theintercept.com/2021/01/24/toxic-chemicals-human-se...

Re: Most young men are single. Most young women are not

#238

Post by mcphage »

GalenErso wrote: post #11

A man who is financially autonomous, practices basic hygiene and grooming, wears tasteful clothing, and approaches women with respect and manners has nothing to worry about. You don't need to make 6 figures, to be 6 feet tall, to have the body of The Rock or 2004 Brad Pitt's face. Having one interesting hobby is also a huge plus, even if it's as simple as hiking or jogging. You just need to be minimally interesting.…

> The trueoffmychest and TwoXChromosomes subreddits are full of horror stories about unkempt or disrespectful men.

They're full of horror stories of unkempt or disrespectful men who are nevertheless in a relationship—so maybe it's not even as hard as all that ;-)

Re: Most young men are single. Most young women are not

#239

Post by mcphage »

Dalewyn wrote: post #117
holler wrote: post #107

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What a sad and cynical view of life. All the negatives you mention are natural parts of living, of being alive, of the circle of life. You're leaving out all of the joy, the triumph, the beauty, and the awe of having a brief moment of consciousness on this planet, in this universe.

If you're insinuating I'm miserable, you are wrong. I'm plenty happy living my life as I see fit, and I don't see marriage as a potential addition to that happiness. It's as simple as that.

> I'm plenty happy living my life as I see fit

Then why would you imagine parents tell their kids that life is "fucking horrible", instead of telling them that life is "plenty happy"? Like, everything you describe, you have or will go through as well, and apparently you don't find it to be "shit. Absolute shit".

Re: Most young men are single. Most young women are not

#240

Post by DogLover_ »

attemptone wrote: post #233
DogLover_ wrote: post #76

Men were told that feminism is good, and the rise of women should not be a threat to them. These result shows the opposite I think.

Ah yes, my granfather still remembers the moment he was told that feminism is good. And from then on he deeply knew that the rise of women is no threat to him and his brethren. I on the other hand look at this result and long for the old days, were only the eldest son was allowed to marry and women were not allowed to vote. Jokes aside, your view of feminism, it's history and results is very reductive. Are you talkin…

I may not be using the term feminism accurately, but what I mean is that men were told that any progress made for women would also be beneficial for them. While I fully support gender equality and fairness, it doesn't seem like these advancements have actually helped men. It appears to be a zero-sum scenario.
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