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Ask HN: What is the best advice you got on any aspect of life?

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221–230 of 281 posts

Re: Ask HN: What is the best advice you got on any aspect of life?

#221

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don’t apply. It’s what shows up in my email or LinkedIn inbox. I don’t take the interviews when they are obviously misaligned with my level/skillset/interests because they are a waste of time.

Just take the intro call and tell them your expectations (while being as vague as possible). If they dont bite then you didn’t lose much

Yeah I think a qualification to add would be “Take the qualified interview.” If you apply, that’s your qualification so take the interview. If they contact you and you tell them what you want, that’s your qualification, so if they agree and offer an interview, take it.

Re: Ask HN: What is the best advice you got on any aspect of life?

#222

- to get what you have never got, be prepared to do what you have never done - do not allow your inbox to manage your time - Manage, or be managed - people overpay to have you keep doing what you were already doing before. - win:wins - most people do not experience pmf that then warps their thinking into plateaus of mediocrity - it is mighty difficult to create wealth being an employee. Most mansions, large homes in…

- it is mighty difficult to create wealth being an employee. Most mansions, large homes in any neighbourhood belong to business(wo)men

It's not just business; plenty of small ones struggle. It's ownership. Own that mansion, and it's rise in value will far outstrip your salary. Own other people's work, by owning a company, and even if doesn't make much profit it's probably worth much more than a salary.

Re: Ask HN: What is the best advice you got on any aspect of life?

#224

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Just take the intro call and tell them your expectations (while being as vague as possible). If they dont bite then you didn’t lose much

Yeah I think a qualification to add would be “Take the qualified interview.” If you apply, that’s your qualification so take the interview. If they contact you and you tell them what you want, that’s your qualification, so if they agree and offer an interview, take it.

Agreed, and I assumed people would apply some common sense to how and when to generalise 4 words.

I still get what is clearly blind spam from recruitment agencies in a country I haven’t lived in for > 15 years (so they CV they have on file would be just as old) offering me entry level positions. Those don’t ever warrant a response. But if someone has gone to the effort to actually look at your work history, see what you’ve done, and reached out… take the interview.

Re: Ask HN: What is the best advice you got on any aspect of life?

#225

For young, single heterosexual men; cultivate deep platonic friendships with women. Get a hobby, do charity work, find something where you meet and become good friends with multiple women of different ages and backgrounds. Do not ever attempt to date any of these women. Why? Because most men know woefully few women, and your life will be much richer. A lot of men know very little about the experiences, fears, and hop…

A woman will very unlikely give you an honest advice. They are usually not made for that with friends. They usually just re-assure and "support" you. That's been my experience.

There are two types of woman who will be-friend you platonically: Woman who are interested in you sexually as a partner and want to be close to your radar, just in case. Woman who are not interested in you but find value in your friendship (either connections, money, emotional support, etc...)

In both cases, it's a bad deal for you. You are much better finding your own real partner instead of masquerading around other woman to forget about your lacking in that area.

Friendships with woman do exist. But they are limited by the fact that man and woman have very different hobbies and interests. That is, unless you are interested spending Saturday evening looking out for the perfect face mask or the color of your jeans; and I don't mean that in a pejorative way.

Re: Ask HN: What is the best advice you got on any aspect of life?

#226
1. “Sometimes, you just have to trust people.” Said to me by the owner of a shop at a farmer’s market after I explained I didn’t have cash on hand to pay for an item so I couldn’t accept it, but would go to an ATM to get it. She gave me the items anyway, and I promptly went to an ATM to bring her the money. I grew up in an environment where I was constantly told about all the bad intentions everyone around me had, and how dangerous the world was. It was unnerving, so that moment was refreshing and eye-opening.

2. When I was buying my first bed, I talked with an older salesperson who did a great job helping me find what I was looking for. During our long conversation, he said, “You never know what someone you’re interacting with is going through. Keep that in mind and try not to assume bad intentions.”

3. The less time I spend on the computer/looking at screens/sitting down, and the more time I spend out in the physical world, allowing myself to explore, the more my subjective well-being increases. Similarly, the more time I spend interacting physically with people, the more meaningful, nuanced, and empathy-building interactions I have. I learned this when I quit my first job and spent a week in an hostel in Alaska, and just immersed myself in _life_ for a week.

4. It’s okay to not be productive all the time. I don’t have to side hustle if I don’t want to. Not doing so doesn’t mean I should withhold compassion from myself. Remember, there are other aspects of life outside of work, and in fact, time, relationships, and health are more important than work. I learned this during COVID when I had family in a coma for multiple months.

Re: Ask HN: What is the best advice you got on any aspect of life?

#227

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'd say do that, but with men. Men of good character, morals, aspirations and goals. Platonic friendship between men and women is a myth. (Exceptions exists, but only confirm the rule)

> Platonic friendship between men and women is a myth This is a not unusual opinion amongst Americans, and one I questioned myself, but I can assure you after moving to Europe its a cultural issue(especially in the south).

Europe also has much higher infidelity rates, with France reporting over 37% of women (using women as an example since the data came up more easily) having had affairs compared to 13% in the usa.

Re: Ask HN: What is the best advice you got on any aspect of life?

#228

Earlier quoted context omitted.

First, thank you for asking, I already appreciate your constructive approach. Now I would like to be more precise: I assert that, at the very least, male-female-friendship is a deviation from the rule . I.e., it is not expected to work, but it can in some instances. Why? Because male and female are by default and by nature sexually attracted to each other, and if not then that is simply unexpected . In fact, there ar…

Agreed. But you can have sexual fantasies and still be friend, no ?

Not if you're married

Re: Ask HN: What is the best advice you got on any aspect of life?

#229

Work and career progression: “always take the interview”. I reported direct to the CEO at a startup and I told him our largest customer had headhunted me, and I assumed I wasn’t special and they’re probably targeting many of us. He asked me what the process was like and what the offer was, and when I told him I didn’t take the initial call hand he shook his head. “You always take the interview. Absolute worst case is…

This advice is solid gold. I declined many interviews when I was at the top of my game for silly-in-hindsight reasons such as I have just joined, I am happy here etc. Have always regretted it ever since.
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