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Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

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Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#241
post #187

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There is a strong correlation with a puritanical culture having much higher birth rates than a sexually permissive one, so I don't think that is the reason.

We have moved from a sexually permissive society 60/70/80s 90s.. but sex is now taboo under the thought of children seeing content and being abused by the experience and children being allowed in previously adult spaces. Ever wonder why murdering, killing, blood, guns are allowed on prime time tv but naked breasts are not? It use to be the opposite.

Your tv example is severely outdated. Do you know how easy it is for anyone with an internet connection to watch hardcore pornography on demand for free? It's been that way since the internet went mainstream.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#242
post #43

> This might be hard, as no unwanted advances are taking place. We simply have students excelling at the course, and drawing-in a crowd. I should've been more clear with my "leching" comment. Still, it seems harassing in nature. It seems increasingly that society demands a world where dating only happens during designated and approved dating times and venues, and outside those strictly delimited places, men are to be…

> It seems increasingly that society demands a world where dating only happens during designated and approved dating times and venues

Isn't that the definition of "dating" though? If you're not at a previously designated "date" you're not really dating, you're just hanging out as friends. You can still try to show off good qualities that would hopefully raise the other person's interest. Sometimes people who hang out as friends even get involved quite closely romantically prior to having any formal "date" together.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#243
post #146
post #43

> This might be hard, as no unwanted advances are taking place. We simply have students excelling at the course, and drawing-in a crowd. I should've been more clear with my "leching" comment. Still, it seems harassing in nature. It seems increasingly that society demands a world where dating only happens during designated and approved dating times and venues, and outside those strictly delimited places, men are to be…

That will not lead to a drop in fertility. Infact, that's exactly how high fertility societies operate. At least the Islamic ones, like Afghanistan for example, where the population doubled since 2001. Fertility has been dropping since the 80s, long before anything to do with wokeism or meetoo or whatever.

In those societies, 'dating' may be highly regulated, but it is present and functional, however immoral to women's rights.

But in our free societies, where dating and romance are left to chance, we are one by one prohibiting it in the places where that chance might occur, and not replacing them with anything. Not at school, not at the workplace, not outside the workplace if you are in the same profession and there might be a perceived "imbalance of power"...

That doesn't eliminate everyone you meet and get to know, but it eliminates most.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#244
post #32

Earlier quoted context omitted.

And Zuckerberg. All sorts of creepy disembodied men do this kind of thing!

Zuckerberg's case is arguably even worse (though I completely agree otherwise). If I recall he created a way for harvard guys to rate their female peers appearances and had some pretty disparaging comments on the site itself.

that's how it happened in the movie

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#245
post #17
post #8

Don't let senior level students audit junior level classes? Why are they even there besides the reasons outlined in the problem? This is a problem with the University because they don't want to acknowledge a problem. Do they really think that's going to last? If it was my daughter who left the class because she was harassed I'd be very angry.

Why do people see this as even remotely unethical? It seems to me that it's great that plenty of younger people are getting essentially free tutoring sessions and fun friendships/relationships out of it. Unless there's sexual assault/battery being alleged here, this is both ethical and good for all the students involved!

>Why do people see this as even remotely unethical? It seems to me that it's great that plenty of younger people are getting essentially free tutoring sessions and fun friendships/relationships out of it.

>Unless there's sexual assault/battery being alleged here, this is both ethical and good for all the students involved!

A high school senior in Calc 2 would a helpful in an Algebra 1 class as a tutor or teaching assistant. A high school senior in Calc 2 taking that same class on the pretense they forgot how to take the slope a linear equation is, uh, just weird vibes you know? It's that pretense that does it.

Double so if there's an age dynamic of Seniors/Freshmen.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#246
post #227
post #180

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> It's interesting that one of the highest-voted responses suggests bringing in the ten ton hammer of legal governmental involvement against a bunch of kids trying to score a date. Yikes. I think the bigger "yikes" to me is the implication that being young, male, and lusty as a motivation is a sufficient to dismiss any possibility of illicit behavior.

I don't see that implication being made and I have trouble believing anyone could read that into the above in good faith. The linked questions mentions that this has created an uncomfortable environment for female undergraduates -- but no allegations of illegal behavior.

According to one person anyway. We haven’t surveyed the class, correct?

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#247
I'd guess the people doing this gaming probably think it's clever, fun, and fair play (designed by-and-for hormonal college students).

Maybe all the school needs, to handle the problem without scandal or lawsuits, is for the students doing it to be called before a dean, who says it's disrupting class, and to save the dating efforts for extracurricular environments, not taint the academics.

If they don't seem to get it, spell out what a scandal they almost caused, but hopefully can be averted, and that the risk to themselves starts with getting suspended/expelled, and can get worse for them in the court of public opinion/mobbing.

That people should keep dating efforts out of workplace dynamics is also a good lesson for those kids to learn in the gentler environment of college/university, than to learn a harder way in a company.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#248

Earlier quoted context omitted.

“College students taking social classes with no intention of learning” is not exactly headline material though.

I got the sense it was an academic class, not a social class. Also, most students who take classes with no interest in learning would either skip class or keep their mouths shut. The problem here is that they're degrading the learning environment for others.

I think her argument would have been stronger if she had of listed more details about how the academic environment is being degraded. Upperclassmen helping with labs and offering to tutor some students doesn't immediately make it clear how it is making it harder for students to learn.

If there are students in the class who need help but don't want to go to the upperclassmen, then I'd assume the professor would have more time to help them. Overall I'm curious if the class is doing better or worse than previous classes.

Re: Need help with students who've turned my class into a dating service

#249
post #149
post #116

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don't think that taking a class to get to know single women of your own age is disrespectful. Do we know they are objectifying? The post said this was about finding a future wife.

It’s disrespectful because it ignores the fact that the women are not there to date, but to learn. The men are getting in their way by showing off and offering disingenuous tutoring.

It takes two to tango. If the service works, then clearly some of the women are there to date. Who are we to tell them they're wrong, if both parties benefit from the arrangement?

Obviously if the men are harassing the women, that's bad and they should be held accountable.

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