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Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

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91–100 of 806 posts

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#91
post #53

I love how the article compares the unequal distribution of sex partners with the unequal distribution of wealth, because in my opinion that might be part of the cause. I would predict that being able to afford a nice apartment in a good area close to date locations will easily 10x your sex chances. There have been other studies about young men struggling to find jobs that pay well enough for them to become financial…

technological advancement enabled dispropotinal wealth accumulation, also enabled disproportional partner accumulation. So the underlying problem is that industrial revolution and it's consequences have been a disaster for the human race.

Have I got news for you about the disproportional partner accumulation situation preindustrial revolution..

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#92
post #65
post #8

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Prostitution is already legal in lots of countries. I’m not sure that there’s any evidence that it makes a huge amount of difference to this problem.

"lots of countries" To my knowledge only Germany.

UK also, in addition to sibling's list.

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#93

> One possible aid for sexual loneliness might come from online dating apps such as Tinder. In theory, online dating could provide an efficient way to find a partner. However, online dating divides people heavily into winners and losers – perhaps even more so than traditional dating. While women can get attention from thousands of men online in just a few hours, men are lucky if anyone is interested in them My wife d…

I've been running online communities for years and this, as far as I can see, factual. I've read somewhere, maybe multiple times, that most men are emotionally and sexually deprived. That sounds correct given the data I have. I'm ok looking and I feel like I can make women like me. I still struggle sometimes. Many of my friends do much worse than me. I have friends that I find intellectually stimulating, average-look…

It's interesting to me. I have female friends in their 30s who go on tons of dates but reject pretty much all of them for any long-term relationship. The ones they seem to be in to tend to reject them after a couple of dates.

I'm not there in those interactions but I wonder how much of it is a mismatch between what you desire in a relationship and who you are attracted to in a person.

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#94
post #53

I love how the article compares the unequal distribution of sex partners with the unequal distribution of wealth, because in my opinion that might be part of the cause. I would predict that being able to afford a nice apartment in a good area close to date locations will easily 10x your sex chances. There have been other studies about young men struggling to find jobs that pay well enough for them to become financial…

technological advancement enabled dispropotinal wealth accumulation, also enabled disproportional partner accumulation. So the underlying problem is that industrial revolution and it's consequences have been a disaster for the human race.

Excellent summary :)

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#95
post #18

> The National Survey of Family Growth data shows that in 2002 the most sexually active top 20 % of American heterosexual men had 12 lifetime sex partners while the top 5 % had 38 partners.3 Ten years later, in 2012, the most sexually active top 20 % now reported 15 lifetime sex partners and the top 5 % of men reported 50 lifetime sex partners. Year | 2002 | 2012 --------------------------------- Top 20% # Partners |…

> Wow - so what does 2022 look like?

Hasn't been reported yet, but some simple extrapolation would expect top 20% to drop to 8 lifetime partners and top 5% to increase to 80 lifetime partners.

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#96

> One possible aid for sexual loneliness might come from online dating apps such as Tinder. In theory, online dating could provide an efficient way to find a partner. However, online dating divides people heavily into winners and losers – perhaps even more so than traditional dating. While women can get attention from thousands of men online in just a few hours, men are lucky if anyone is interested in them My wife d…

"She thinks I'm exaggerating ..."

Probably best to keep it that way.

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#97
post #10

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have a healthy dating life outside of apps, but yeah - I think women understanding how difficult and dramatically different online dating is for men in comparison to women will never truly be accepted or taken seriously by women.

The best way I've heard to explain the difference is men are dying of thirst in a desert and woman are dying of thirst in an ocean.

I hope the depth of that analogy is intentional.

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#98

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If people consider marriage as a contract of exchange, then it is already a form of legalized prostitution. Monogamy might be a bigger underlying problem. Esther Perel's Mating in Captivity in a good read on this topic.

Monogamy was a fantastic tool to manage diseases for thousands of years. Imagine removing antibiotics, vaccines, screening tools, and any other medical treatment. Anyone who was around for the AIDs epidemic will understand how quickly a large segment of the population can start dying off. The early portion, it was literally a mystery disease that was killing off anyone that engaged in risky lifestyle.

Interesting insight from Darwinism point of view!

If we have solved the public health problems, does it make Monogamy an empty construct? Or there are other social/economical/biological factors that hold it in place?

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#100

> One possible aid for sexual loneliness might come from online dating apps such as Tinder. In theory, online dating could provide an efficient way to find a partner. However, online dating divides people heavily into winners and losers – perhaps even more so than traditional dating. While women can get attention from thousands of men online in just a few hours, men are lucky if anyone is interested in them My wife d…

I've been running online communities for years and this, as far as I can see, factual. I've read somewhere, maybe multiple times, that most men are emotionally and sexually deprived. That sounds correct given the data I have. I'm ok looking and I feel like I can make women like me. I still struggle sometimes. Many of my friends do much worse than me. I have friends that I find intellectually stimulating, average-look…

> I'm ok looking and I feel like I can make women like me. I still struggle sometimes. Many of my friends do much worse than me. I have friends that I find intellectually stimulating, average-looking, that have not been touched by a woman in years.

While I think that globally the sentiment about this is true (market is driven by women), I also had many average-looking, intellectually stimulating male friends that said "that girl is too ugly".

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