Live data from Hacker News

I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

twitter.com

311–320 of 344 posts

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#311
post #150

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The risk of them not being able to pay you back and thus destroying the friendship is so high that I wouldn’t recommend this unless you are ok with losing that person as a friend OR you just give them the money without expectation of it being paid back.

Not expecting anything in return has definitely made me happier. It's on the borrower to worry about paying me back. Me, I don't care.

How does this work in practice, though? I don't know how this would be possible at all. I have loaned money to family members in the past, and been paid back when they were back on their feet. But if a friend or family member borrowed money and never paid it back, even after they were over their financial difficulties, and never mentioned it or made any effort to repay the loan, it would certainly affect my opinion of them; at the very least, I'd expect them to offer some explanation as to why they weren't able or willing to pay me back as we agreed.

So do you actually mean this, or are you just signaling how kind you are?

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#312

I loan money to people and never expect to be repaid. If someone asks for $2k I give them $5k. $400 give them $1k. Sometimes I get paid back. Usually not. It’s because people are aware I have money so various people ask. The goal isn’t to get paid back. Often these acquaintances cut off all contact. The goal is to never be asked for money again and slowly bled out by frequent sob stories. If they know they are alread…

[deleted]

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#313

I loan money to people and never expect to be repaid. If someone asks for $2k I give them $5k. $400 give them $1k. Sometimes I get paid back. Usually not. It’s because people are aware I have money so various people ask. The goal isn’t to get paid back. Often these acquaintances cut off all contact. The goal is to never be asked for money again and slowly bled out by frequent sob stories. If they know they are alread…

You're paying people off to go away and leave you alone and not be your friend, in a way that doesn't make you look like a jerk like you would be if you just didn't loan them money?

The only way this makes sense to me, especially at that kind of money you're talking about, is if you are fairly wealthy.

And, man, to me what this says is that it's impossible to have real solid relationships with people if you are rich and they aren't. It makes me think of all these people who only are interested in you for your money, and your fear that people will think you're a jerk if you don't give them money (over and over again!) anyway because you have so much money, all these people approaching you with "sob stories." It seems like it makes it almost impossible to be real friends with people, if they aren't as wealthy as you.

I guess it's a reason to be glad I'm not that rich, after all.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#314

Earlier quoted context omitted.

grim way to think of people but ok have fun

It's the view of someone who has lost over $10k to "I'll pay it back!!!" people - they haven't payed back in 10 years now. And they left behind truckloads of trash. How much have you lost to those? I would speculate once you get to a sum this significant your perspective would change ;)

I've loaned out way more than $10k over the course of my life, but this is the oppression of growing up poor.

If you grew up rich, you didn't have friends or uncles or aunt's constantly asking for money and never paying it back so parent poster's mindset seems dramatic/extreme. It is not.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#315

Earlier quoted context omitted.

On the other hand, now everyone thinks you're an easy target to borrow money from, and they won't have to pay you back.

How many randoms do you envision coming up to them to ask for money?

People at work, the gym, bar, wherever you go.

We had a guy at the racquetball club move away, and then about 10 people all mentioned how he owed them $20...

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#316

Earlier quoted context omitted.

So that's an estate tax upon death. But given we're talking about loans and gifts while a person is living, I think the correct tax to invoke is the gift tax that has a limit of $17,000 per year. https://www.irs.gov/businesses/small-businesses-self-employe...

If taxpayer A gifts taxpayer B $1M today, taxpayer B owes $0 in taxes to the US federal government. Taxpayer A also owes $0, assuming that is all they have gifted in their life. But they do have to file a form with the IRS tabulating the total they have gifted, minus the annual exclusion ($17k). Neither taxpayer A nor taxpayer B have a federal tax liability for gifting more than the annual exclusion amount. So I do n…

> If taxpayer A gifts taxpayer B $1M today, taxpayer B owes $0 in taxes to the US federal government.

If A is alive when that happens then that is wrong. B will be taxed on the amount of $1M - 17k because the gift tax applies not the estate tax.

If A were dead and gifted B in their will, then you would be correct because the estate tax applies in this scenario.

Again, since we're taking about loans and gifts while a person is alive in this thread, the first scenario of the gift tax applies.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#317

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There is both an annual (currently $17,000/recipient) and a lifetime (currently $12.92 million/donor) limit before the donor pays gift taxes.

The $17k per year is just a reporting limit. No taxes are owed until gifts exceed the lifetime amount, which is somewhere around $12M, or maybe $13M now as you write.

Didn’t realize this, thanks!

But I also like the IRS limits. It limits how much my family/in laws think I might be able to give them in a year :)

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#318

Earlier quoted context omitted.

How many randoms do you envision coming up to them to ask for money?

People at work, the gym, bar, wherever you go. We had a guy at the racquetball club move away, and then about 10 people all mentioned how he owed them $20...

But that’s the reverse relationship? One guy asking several people for money. Additionally, I think most people who borrow or lend money do not make a habit of discussing it.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#319
post #93

I loaned a close college friend $7000 last year. Due to life circumstances and lack of family resources, he was stuck in a rural area with no developer jobs. He was having trouble landing a remote job and I ignorantly asked why he wasn’t applying to in-person jobs on the west coast. He told me that he certainly wouldn’t be able to afford to move and I told him “don’t let that stop you”. Fronting him moving expenses w…

> I guess my message is: sometimes loaning money won’t work out, but when it does, the ROI (emotionally and for society) is extremely high. But what if 90% of the time it doesn't work out?

"extremely high"

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#320

Earlier quoted context omitted.

People at work, the gym, bar, wherever you go. We had a guy at the racquetball club move away, and then about 10 people all mentioned how he owed them $20...

But that’s the reverse relationship? One guy asking several people for money. Additionally, I think most people who borrow or lend money do not make a habit of discussing it.

In the movie mention in the original post, the character looks up to a mobster. A mob guy would typically do loan sharking, so people would go to them for a loan.

If you're going to be a loan shark you can't have people thinking they won't have to pay you back. You have to break their kneecaps.

Post reply on HN