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I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

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Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#81

I loan money to people and never expect to be repaid. If someone asks for $2k I give them $5k. $400 give them $1k. Sometimes I get paid back. Usually not. It’s because people are aware I have money so various people ask. The goal isn’t to get paid back. Often these acquaintances cut off all contact. The goal is to never be asked for money again and slowly bled out by frequent sob stories. If they know they are alread…

> The goal is to never be asked for money again and slowly bled out by frequent sob stories

Sometimes if you "loan" people money they will cut contact and disappear from your life.

The much more likely scenario is that you will get the reputation of someone who has money and is generous with it, and these requests and sob stories will increase 100x.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#82

I loan money to people and never expect to be repaid. If someone asks for $2k I give them $5k. $400 give them $1k. Sometimes I get paid back. Usually not. It’s because people are aware I have money so various people ask. The goal isn’t to get paid back. Often these acquaintances cut off all contact. The goal is to never be asked for money again and slowly bled out by frequent sob stories. If they know they are alread…

"Neither a borrower nor a lender be; For loan oft loses both itself and friend, And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry."

-Shakespear

I've just followed this my entire life and it has served me very well. Other than a mortgage, I never borrow, and other than family emergencies, I never lend.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#83
post #64
post #35

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If you're struggling, and get $1000 from someone who made $100M on crypto, would you be in a hurry to pay them back, or even care at all?

> get $1000 from someone It's not "get" if it's a loan. The IRS might also be interested if you treat this a taxable gift rather than a loan... (unlikely they'd care for $1000).

Why the heck private gifts are taxable and it is tolerated?

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#84
When I was younger I learned that loaning money to friends, and then asking to be repaid, sucks. You're made to feel like you're some sort of Scrooge character. Now I either simply give whatever is asked, and make it clear I do not wish to be paid back, or just say no.

Initially it seemed logical to say OK you need 100 bucks for this or that and you'll get me back. But then a month later I'd mention it and was met with this sort of "why are you being a jerk about it" response. Now I'm in a position that its not a big deal, but back then even that relatively small amount of money was a big deal. It was a tough lesson to learn that some people just use the term 'loan' to make themselves feel less guilty for asking, or maybe intend to ghost you regardless.

I think this also gets into Americans (or maybe just Southerners?) being weird about money and personal finance. Talking about money is taboo.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#85

I loan money to people and never expect to be repaid. If someone asks for $2k I give them $5k. $400 give them $1k. Sometimes I get paid back. Usually not. It’s because people are aware I have money so various people ask. The goal isn’t to get paid back. Often these acquaintances cut off all contact. The goal is to never be asked for money again and slowly bled out by frequent sob stories. If they know they are alread…

This is more or less the same advice that Kevin O'Leary gives in his book "The Cold Hard Truth on Men, Women, and Money". His stance is that money is basically like blood since you need it to live, so it should be protected from predators and leeches

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#86
post #64
post #35

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If you're struggling, and get $1000 from someone who made $100M on crypto, would you be in a hurry to pay them back, or even care at all?

> get $1000 from someone It's not "get" if it's a loan. The IRS might also be interested if you treat this a taxable gift rather than a loan... (unlikely they'd care for $1000).

> (unlikely they'd care for $1000).

They certainly wouldn't, since you can legally receive a gift of up to $16k per year tax free.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#88
post #70
post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There exist sociopaths and utility monsters.

Or, at the most charitable, people in really bad places (either by choices or bad luck)... and are doing what they need to get by. And honestly, habitually soliciting money from friends shares a lot of similarities with using venture capital -- the reasoning that it's better to explode with someone else's money than your own.

To be fair, the stock market has been invented to spread risk. Better to own 10% of 10 boat expeditions than only one whole boat.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#89
post #35
post #8

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That is so surreal to me. I had to loan money from friends for real emergencies and always made sure they get paid - often more than they gave. How can one not be guilt-ridden until their deathbed?

If you're struggling, and get $1000 from someone who made $100M on crypto, would you be in a hurry to pay them back, or even care at all?

>would you be in a hurry to pay them back

Yes, because i don't like to call myself a shitty human.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#90
post #83
post #64

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> get $1000 from someone It's not "get" if it's a loan. The IRS might also be interested if you treat this a taxable gift rather than a loan... (unlikely they'd care for $1000).

Why the heck private gifts are taxable and it is tolerated?

That law is not particularly widely enforced, and it seems to only be written to pursue those who use it as a loophole around inheritance laws.
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