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I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

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Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#41

Post by roflyear »

okasaki wrote: post #35
zahrc wrote: post #8

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That is so surreal to me. I had to loan money from friends for real emergencies and always made sure they get paid - often more than they gave. How can one not be guilt-ridden until their deathbed?

If you're struggling, and get $1000 from someone who made $100M on crypto, would you be in a hurry to pay them back, or even care at all?

I'd honestly hope that person wouldn't make it seem like it is a loan. I'd hope they just said "hey, here's money."

Seems like a major jerk move to structure the "loan" in a way where you remove these people from your life.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#42

Post by loeg »

8f2ab37a-ed6c wrote: post #18

Seems like the case of wealth that cannot be hidden from one's circles (and the outside world) due to him being so well known as a person in tech at the time of Doom's cultural zenith and being in the news cycle so often. I wonder if most often the smart move is to make sure that one's sudden acquisition of wealth (say the sale of a startup-now-a-successful-scaleup) is hidden from one's even closest circles to avoid…

You can also just say "no." Presumably Carmack has learned that lesson now.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#43

Post by ryandrake »

Sakos wrote: post #12
monero-xmr wrote: post #2

I loan money to people and never expect to be repaid. If someone asks for $2k I give them $5k. $400 give them $1k. Sometimes I get paid back. Usually not. It’s because people are aware I have money so various people ask. The goal isn’t to get paid back. Often these acquaintances cut off all contact. The goal is to never be asked for money again and slowly bled out by frequent sob stories. If they know they are alread…

Same here. If I'm able, I'll loan whatever amount necessary. Some people pay it back, some don't. I never tell them they have to and I never expect them to. In most cases it's been worth it, because 1) they know they can count on me when they're having trouble (and that's important to me) and 2) I've found they'll help me in whatever they can if I do need help. I've also asked friends for money and I've been incredib…

I don't remember where I read this, but a good compromise strategy for lending money you don't think you're getting back might be this:

1. Assume it's never getting paid back and only lend out money you're willing to lose.

2. Tell them if you get paid back in full, then later, they can ask for another loan.

3. If you don't get paid back, then consider it a gift, but no more loans to that person.

This way, you can continue helping people who are down on their luck but responsible about paying back, and you avoid being drained by deadbeats.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#44

Post by SuoDuanDao »

zahrc wrote: post #8
monero-xmr wrote: post #2

I loan money to people and never expect to be repaid. If someone asks for $2k I give them $5k. $400 give them $1k. Sometimes I get paid back. Usually not. It’s because people are aware I have money so various people ask. The goal isn’t to get paid back. Often these acquaintances cut off all contact. The goal is to never be asked for money again and slowly bled out by frequent sob stories. If they know they are alread…

That is so surreal to me. I had to loan money from friends for real emergencies and always made sure they get paid - often more than they gave. How can one not be guilt-ridden until their deathbed?

The majority of requests for money come from a minority of people with sad stories. You are clearly a member of the majority of people with sad stories.

I think the minority would call you a victim of 'temporarily embarrassed millionaire syndrome'.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#45

Post by neogodless »

adql wrote: post #7

Well it took me borrowing one video game to learn that lesson. "No, you must've borrowed it to someone else" when I asked. First game I bought for my own pocket money, which at time, in Poland, was a lot for a kid as it was full price title, Baldur's Gate 1 in nice box with manual and a map, and dubbed gloriously with then-radio/TV stars, hell, the narrator voice was better than original. Needless to say I was pretty…

Only for your edification, as your English is 1/0 (infinitely) better than my Polish. I believe you meant "lending / lent" in place of "borrowing / borrowed." We separate the words, so "to borrow" is to temporarily take the item, "to lend" is to temporarily give the item.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#46

Post by wkat4242 »

monero-xmr wrote: post #2

I loan money to people and never expect to be repaid. If someone asks for $2k I give them $5k. $400 give them $1k. Sometimes I get paid back. Usually not. It’s because people are aware I have money so various people ask. The goal isn’t to get paid back. Often these acquaintances cut off all contact. The goal is to never be asked for money again and slowly bled out by frequent sob stories. If they know they are alread…

Why would you pay so much just for them not to annoy you? That seems a very high price for some peace and quiet.

I would just cut off contact with those people. I don't really get this much because I'm not rich, but if people ask me for loans just to get money out of me I will be the one breaking off contact.

On the other hand I have a friend of mine who has loaned money and never paid me back, but she is always in a financial hard spot and she is extremely generous to the community she drives. I never really expected to be paid back for that either but in this case I just wanted to help someone who cares more about others than herself.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#47

Post by boredemployee »

okasaki wrote: post #35
zahrc wrote: post #8

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That is so surreal to me. I had to loan money from friends for real emergencies and always made sure they get paid - often more than they gave. How can one not be guilt-ridden until their deathbed?

If you're struggling, and get $1000 from someone who made $100M on crypto, would you be in a hurry to pay them back, or even care at all?

I think it's not about the value but about the deal (or principles). Some people in trouble really improve after a debt for a friend/family like that (some don't).

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#48

Post by [deleted] »

richthegeek wrote: post #39
adql wrote: post #7

Well it took me borrowing one video game to learn that lesson. "No, you must've borrowed it to someone else" when I asked. First game I bought for my own pocket money, which at time, in Poland, was a lot for a kid as it was full price title, Baldur's Gate 1 in nice box with manual and a map, and dubbed gloriously with then-radio/TV stars, hell, the narrator voice was better than original. Needless to say I was pretty…

pożyczyć is both borrow and lend :) In English there's a difference of direction. "Kuba pożyczył moj długopis" - Jakub borrowed my pen "Kuba pożyczył mi jego długopos" - Jakub lent me his pen I'm learning Polish slowly, living in Warsaw...

[deleted]

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#49

Post by markus_zhang »

I rarely loan $$ to ither people but when I do it's usually small and considered as a gift, not a loan. I really hate piggybacking other peoplebto claim my principal.

On a side note, everytime I see the name of John Carmack popping up my heart goes to game programming and I have the impulse to create a game. Masters of Doom really is magical.

Re: I went through a period where I loaned money to anyone that asked me

#50

Post by znpy »

pyb wrote: post #20
bena wrote: post #11

I'm surprised American McGee hasn't paid him back prior to this. I always assumed that McGee was more successful than he apparently was. Probably due to him putting his name in front of the game's title.

Sounds like McGee might not have got his fair share of Id's success. Maybe Carmack felt bad about that.

This is often not understood of successful ventures.

There’s usually a fairly small circle of close people that get the biggest share of the financial pie, and others don’t get very much.

I’ve seen a few situations where some friends ended up earning a regular salary at startups when the closed circle made millions. So yeah you can brag about working at $trendy_company but that doesn’t financially translate into anything special.

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