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Ask HN: How to restore cognition after years of trauma? I feel slow and dumb

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Re: Ask HN: How to restore cognition after years of trauma? I feel slow and dumb

#11

Post by kbrannigan »

shortcake27 wrote: post #8
kbrannigan wrote: post #4

If you have enough saved up. Take 1 year of work, disconnect from the rat's race, go to parties, go dancing, chill at a park, let people look down on you for being unemployed. Hang in there, buy only the things you need. Slowly you'll realize what's important, you'll find yourself. And you'll come back stronger than ever, with a different attitude towards careers, jobs and you'll learn to be human and just BE. EDIT:…

I’m in the exact position as the OP. In fact this feels like a description of myself. I could barely achieve the simplest of tasks, so I quit my job. I just did nothing at home for a bit, now I’m backpacking. It’s been 2 months and so far my mental health hasn’t improved one bit. I still feel like my brain is trapped in mud; anything that requires minimum mental effort takes an insurmountable amount of energy. I’m no…

If today you only had 20% to give, and you gave it. You gave 100%.

If today all you could do was: Brush your teeth then go back to bed. You've accomplished.

We are not PRODUCTIVITY MACHINES. We are humans, just like birds are birding, squirrels are squirreling, bees are beeing?

I'm not saying to stay complacent, but we humans in this current society have set ourselves for failures.

OMG! I'm not making 250k a year, i'm a failure, I don't have a TRILLION dollar startup, I'm a failure (not saying you feel this way) but you get my point.

Re: Ask HN: How to restore cognition after years of trauma? I feel slow and dumb

#12

Post by defnotahuman »

I've been struggling with this for years and I've made tremendous progress in 2022. Here's what worked for me:

- developing a regular aerobic exercise routine. Starting my day with a walk or run makes such a difference, I feel like a different person after I exercise

- reducing/cutting out substances. I love cannabis but I recognize that it exacerbates my ADHD symptoms, reduces my desire to connect socially and reduces my cognitive ability. Alcohol disturbs my sleep as well. If I don't keep tight limits on my consumption and take long breaks between use, my mental health declines significantly

- find a constructive activity that you love to do. I've fallen in love with painting. It gets me off the screens and relaxes me while giving me a sense of personal accomplishment and growth. It gives me space to appreciate myself and cultivate self-compassion and love. Don't try to make it a side hustle, just something that you enjoy and helps you unwind

- practicing a self-care/personal space cleaning routine. I still struggle with this and by no means keep a 100% clean house all the time. But I know that no matter how bad I'm feeling, I always feel a little better after cleaning. If I'm having a really bad day, I try to clean at least one room in my house (and once I do one, I usually feel motivated enough to do more)

- psychiatric drugs have not worked for me personally, but that certainly doesn't mean they won't work for you. The key to recovery is making them a part of a larger commitment to your overall health. You cannot simply take a drug and ignore the other aspects of your life. Americans have been conditioned to think that a pill solves everything, but this could not be further from the truth

Re: Ask HN: How to restore cognition after years of trauma? I feel slow and dumb

#13

Post by softwaredoug »

Anger. Get angry.

A lot of trauma is internalization. You blame yourself. It's made to be your fault. You're told you're a terrible person. Get mad about what happened to you. Anger is your tool for being pissed off and asserting your boundaries.

https://cptsdfoundation.org/2022/05/31/the-importance-of-ang...

Re: Ask HN: How to restore cognition after years of trauma? I feel slow and dumb

#15

Post by eddsh1994 »

This is not a one size fits all suggestion but works for me; stop drinking, exercise, find a hobby outside of work (I'm doing a mixture of fitness & gaming), ensure work is not the absolute be all and end all of your life (it can be a big part of it sure, but have something else to lean on like a hobby).

Try one small step at a time and keep a journal to see what works and what doesn't; experiment and A/B test yourself. Keep these things as values on a scale of 1 to 10 and grade yourself at the end of each day, try something like shower in the morning and take a run, eat healthier, don't drink, whatever & score it. See what helps. Do that more often and try something else.

Re: Ask HN: How to restore cognition after years of trauma? I feel slow and dumb

#16

Post by defnotahuman »

softwaredoug wrote: post #13

Anger. Get angry. A lot of trauma is internalization. You blame yourself. It's made to be your fault. You're told you're a terrible person. Get mad about what happened to you. Anger is your tool for being pissed off and asserting your boundaries. https://cptsdfoundation.org/2022/05/31/the-importance-of-ang...

This is insanely bad advice, IMO.

Anger is very hard to control, can easily backfire into self-loathing and cause you to strain existing relationships, which can also further fuel internal anger at oneself. If you get mad about what happened to you and start lashing out at others, you risk isolating yourself and deepening your depression.

Re: Ask HN: How to restore cognition after years of trauma? I feel slow and dumb

#18

Post by kbrannigan »

jonfromsf wrote: post #6
kbrannigan wrote: post #4

If you have enough saved up. Take 1 year of work, disconnect from the rat's race, go to parties, go dancing, chill at a park, let people look down on you for being unemployed. Hang in there, buy only the things you need. Slowly you'll realize what's important, you'll find yourself. And you'll come back stronger than ever, with a different attitude towards careers, jobs and you'll learn to be human and just BE. EDIT:…

This is risky advice. Many (most?) people need social context to create meaning and will get depressed if they don't have a job to do and people relying on them. Look at what happens to people when they retire.

Not advocating for social isolation! Maybe work is where you find meaning socially. But there are : church, gym buddies, so many other social outlets.

I'm saying it's okay to not WORK for a living. You can work on hobbies, things that bring you joy, volunteer, but just not be on a 9-5 schedule and just chill for a while, to recover.

Re: Ask HN: How to restore cognition after years of trauma? I feel slow and dumb

#19

Post by bingobongobingo »

shortcake27 wrote: post #8
kbrannigan wrote: post #4

If you have enough saved up. Take 1 year of work, disconnect from the rat's race, go to parties, go dancing, chill at a park, let people look down on you for being unemployed. Hang in there, buy only the things you need. Slowly you'll realize what's important, you'll find yourself. And you'll come back stronger than ever, with a different attitude towards careers, jobs and you'll learn to be human and just BE. EDIT:…

I’m in the exact position as the OP. In fact this feels like a description of myself. I could barely achieve the simplest of tasks, so I quit my job. I just did nothing at home for a bit, now I’m backpacking. It’s been 2 months and so far my mental health hasn’t improved one bit. I still feel like my brain is trapped in mud; anything that requires minimum mental effort takes an insurmountable amount of energy. I’m no…

I was in a similar position to you a couple of years ago. Burned out and quit my job, burned through my savings instead. After two months I felt no improvement and was beating myself up for being a failure, but after ten months I felt oddly re-energised, and ready to resume working.

I don't know what changed, I think it was just time taken to recover my mind. I wish you the best, it's a difficult state of mind to be in.

Re: Ask HN: How to restore cognition after years of trauma? I feel slow and dumb

#20

Post by stusmall »

This is a terrible place to ask. Seek more professionals. If the currents ones haven't helped you find different ones. No one here has enough context about your life to know what you need. Most people here don't have the expertise you need, no matter how confident they are otherwise. Already 15 comments in, I'm seeing terrible advice.

Good luck and I wish you the best.

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