"No, it’s not going to make the world a better place. Yes, it might even make the world a worse place.
But you will be employed."
With the same attitude DuPont managers dumped PFAS into the rivers.
Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SWE job
451–460 of 594 posts
Re: Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SWE job
#452Earlier quoted context omitted.
"We brought along the people we thought were the best, who we got along with, who would get the job done" I really appreciate the sentiment. In my experience such networks have been self-serving and mostly exclusionary, rewarding loyalty more than competence. "You need to make some changes" is not particularly helpful when you're outside the fold. What's typically unstated is something about loyalty, esp. not disclos…
> 2. Never give anyone a reason to dislike you I'm someone who tends to get along and work well with others. That part definitely has its advantages for employability (and life in general), and is recommended. However, taking it to this extreme is just dangerous advice. Constantly being a people pleaser can carry enormous risks, especially (but not limited to) to yourself. It's important to learn to be ok with people…
Everyone has different and possibly ridiculous expectations;w whether they dislike you or not is not really within your control.
Edit: I'd maybe clarify that trying to get people above you not to dislike you is essentially the nature the politics of careerist ladder climbing. If you get laid off, it's just pretty common for people to see themselves as inherently superior because they weren't let go, and therefore think, right or wrong, that you'll reflect poorly on them, because they're careerist ladder climbers. So maybe it's best to carefully cultivate the people from the very start of meeting them which ones still have souls.
Re: Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SWE job
#453Earlier quoted context omitted.
I'm in similar shoes to the author here, and am glad to hear you show some understanding for this. I interviewed with a quite promising company beginning of December, only to immediately get the written feedback (after the first call) of "Well I know a lot of SWE in this town and none of them are struggling to find a job - so if you've been looking for X months, surely there's something wrong with you - and anyway, w…
> I had mentioned how frustrating it was to simply get "no" as negative hiring feedback and asked them to elaborate if at all possible Don’t do this! You’re inviting feedback from someone who is basically a complete stranger, who has an undisclosed set of “standards” they’re judging you against, and who might not actually be very good at assessing talent. The odds of getting a “false signal” are high.
There's no reason to avoid information. You can still ignore it.
Re: Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SWE job
#454We may revert the hard truths to get soft precautions: - Always have savings that will cover at least 6 months of expenses, now probably a year (if indeed it takes so much time to find a new job). - Socialize outside work, ideally have a network of people that work at other companies that you are in touch with. Sports, charities, churches etc. If this is hard, ask yourself if you are overworking yourselves/spend too…
> I propose to have 2 profiles, [...] the second for your private views Or just don't post about your views on anything (controversial or otherwise) on social media. Just opt out. There's no inherent reason why you need to post about anything on social media. If you must, perhaps because you use it to keep in touch with family and friends, just post about things that are going on in your life. There's no reason you n…
The issue I take with this is that employment becomes a form of restriction of free speech. Unfortunately, the reality is most of us can't afford to truly speak our minds because we need a job to put food on the table and a roof over our heads. Still, even with that in mind, I think the best compromise is to provide strong support of your opinions and not just shout whatever political slogan happens to be in vogue.
Re: Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SWE job
#455Thank you for writing this. I have the sinking feeling I will be laid off within the next 6 months and I am already starting to get worried about the job search ahead. This is great preemptive information, now I need the "so you're about to be laid off..." post for someone who hasn't had to interview for a job in 15 years.
Re: Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SWE job
#456Earlier quoted context omitted.
"We brought along the people we thought were the best, who we got along with, who would get the job done" I really appreciate the sentiment. In my experience such networks have been self-serving and mostly exclusionary, rewarding loyalty more than competence. "You need to make some changes" is not particularly helpful when you're outside the fold. What's typically unstated is something about loyalty, esp. not disclos…
>In my experience such networks have been self-serving and mostly exclusionary, rewarding loyalty more than competence. The point being? That is how human social network and constructs work. The ultimate point is to help yourself and not based on some ephemeral grand concept. No matter how competent someone is why would I want to work with them if they will stab me in the back one day? Incompetent people will indirec…
Loyalty is not a quality that should be selected for. Someone could be "stabbing you in the back" because you're doing something wrong, either morally or because your choices are not good for the business, which is ostensibly what you both should be working towards. Demanding or expecting loyalty blinds you to important signals.
Loyalty is a huge failure of human reasoning, and it's frankly bizarre that people see it as a moral virtue given how easily it can be and has been exploited in the past.
Re: Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SWE job
#457Earlier quoted context omitted.
Has Bostock been overturned? https://www.eeoc.gov/laws/guidance/protections-against-emplo...
A ruling by a court isn't the same thing as federal law. There is no federal law establishing my rights, so if a company tries to ask about my personal life (wife, kids, etc.) I politely decline to answer, or I answer vague enough that doesn't give them any useful information.
How often does that happen though? I'm straight and I don't recall ever being asked about my family or love life in a job interview. Not that I'd keep it secret if asked, but why the hell would they be asking?
Re: Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SWE job
#458Earlier quoted context omitted.
Reversing a binary tree is a reference to a FAANG interview. Money makes life easier. It isn’t the goal of your life. We aren’t playing a video game where the person who made the most money “wins” at life.
I’ve worked at small startups and dev shops with low hiring hiring bars and I find way more “princesses” than I have working at Tier 2 companies with leetcode interviews. “Princess” - people that don’t take feedback, are extremely opinionated about their work, and act irrationally in regards to career or business decisions.
So do you consider a “low hiring bar” the director talking about strategy and finding out from the candidates past history that he can probably solve their real world issues?
If he needs to be at two potential customers sites (large health care companies) does he need someone who can “grind leetcode” or does he need someone that can talk to the CxO, the infrastructure team, the development team, etc without embarrassing himself?
Re: Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SWE job
#459Earlier quoted context omitted.
I always lie (through omission) in job interviews, because there's no federal protection against discrimination on basis of sexual orientation.
Even when applying to companies that are LGBTQ friendly? I sometimes self identify on applications if the company has a good reputation with that kind of thing because I’d expect It would give me some diversity points. But maybe that’s not the best idea.
> Even when applying to companies that are LGBTQ friendly? I sometimes self identify on applications if the company has a good reputation with that kind of thing because I’d expect It would give me some diversity points. But maybe that’s not the best idea.
Pretending to be LBGTQ friendly is a good PR while changing actual company culture is hard, expensive and takes time. So don't get fooled by PR stunts and changed policies because they will always be eaten by real company culture.
Re: Hard truths I learned when I got laid off from my SWE job
#460I had this article left on my screen to read after making a cup of tea. Wife was a bit confused, she'd only read "8 Hard Truths I learned when I got laid"...