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Beware of the perfect gentleman

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Re: Beware of the perfect gentleman

#51

Post by Consultant32452 »

csomar wrote: post #48
jollofricepeas wrote: post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Whoa there buddy. Your statement is both downright offensive and untrue. 1. Great recruiters work long hours around others’ schedules 2. Recruiters deal with tons of rejection that most developers don’t have the stomach for 3. Female recruiters are often overworked, harassed, mansplained to and disrespected in our industry as they deal with fragile male egos, imposter syndrome, interview anxiety, etc To build a real…

Are you sure we are getting contacted by the same recruiters? I'm pretty sure most recruiters are not like that; and we would be better without them. Recruiters exists because companies wants to save on $$ (it would make more sense to let developers do the recruiting, and not someone with no technical knowledge). Of course, this has the opposite result which is why the hiring market is such a sh*t-show.

I'm a whore and the recruiters are my pimps. They only like me because the johns hire me. The world makes more sense through that lens.

Re: Beware of the perfect gentleman

#52

Post by [deleted] »

DoreenMichele wrote: post #45

My mind is blown. Even when the ruse is revealed, many victims are unwilling to let go. The truth triggers an emotional whiplash—the promise of a soulmate, a new, fulfilling life, and mutual trust is suddenly lost, leaving the intense feelings of love behind. Once found, the real man in the photos becomes a surrogate for the fantasy. “Some of them would reach out to me and [say], ‘Now that I know what the real person…

[deleted]

Re: Beware of the perfect gentleman

#53

Post by bee_rider »

flooo wrote: post #40
EdwardDiego wrote: post #31

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Back in the MySpace (Bebo also maybe?) days, I met a programmer who harvested womens' profile pictures from social media for the AdultFriendFinder.com adverts on porn sites. He didn't consider it unethical because "you'd have to be really really stupid to think that women are posting their face on a site like AFF". I kinda thought exploiting the really stupid was still unethical, but his response was given that I wor…

How about the women whose profile pics he “harvested” (stole)? Isn’t there a huge ethical issue there?

I think so.

> But now that I've got a few years between me and adtech, I'm totally going to judge you hard, eug1505.

I don’t want to put words in the other dude’s mouth, but I think he thinks so too.

Re: Beware of the perfect gentleman

#54

Post by dijit »

Consultant32452 wrote: post #51
csomar wrote: post #48

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Are you sure we are getting contacted by the same recruiters? I'm pretty sure most recruiters are not like that; and we would be better without them. Recruiters exists because companies wants to save on $$ (it would make more sense to let developers do the recruiting, and not someone with no technical knowledge). Of course, this has the opposite result which is why the hiring market is such a sh*t-show.

I'm a whore and the recruiters are my pimps. They only like me because the johns hire me. The world makes more sense through that lens.

This whole thread is shameful.

Recruiters do a valuable job; I don't pity them and I do not envy them.

The number of bad recruiters I've interacted with are high, but that's largely selection bias: the ones that reach me are not paying attention enough to realise that I'm not going to move.

I've worked closely with recruiters and their job is tiring and thankless; in the end though they can go home peacefully and it's easier to plan their day.

I can't speak to the reason I noticed this phenomena (of conventionally attractive women being overrepresented in recruiting), but I could believe that it's possible that men are more likely to respond to pretty women reaching out to them with kind words and making them feel wanted and valued; thus conventionally attractive women tend to be more successful in the industry, and thus we sort of have some kind of survivorship bias at play.

I don't know if that's true, but I could believe it quite comfortably.

Re: Beware of the perfect gentleman

#55

Post by MikePlacid »

jollofricepeas wrote: post #44
ikiris wrote: post #41

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Quoted post unavailable.

Whoa there buddy. Your statement is both downright offensive and untrue. 1. Great recruiters work long hours around others’ schedules 2. Recruiters deal with tons of rejection that most developers don’t have the stomach for 3. Female recruiters are often overworked, harassed, mansplained to and disrespected in our industry as they deal with fragile male egos, imposter syndrome, interview anxiety, etc To build a real…

My son worked as a summer job at a small recruiting setup in Silicon Valley. He was actually doing the interviews.

- Oh, but doesn't it require a lot of technical knowledge?

- Not exactly, we are just checking a) if he has at least 5 years of experience, b) that he graduated from one of the top 10 schools.

>perseverance in the face of rejection

The only rejection this company was facing was when their software pipeline for dumping resumes at Google and others was broken for a week. So no money was incoming.

- Oh, I can look at it if they want.

- See, this thing is written by a friend of the owner. They live at the same dorm room, actually. So it's politically incorrect for me to even suggest that something is wrong.

And so they persevered, indeed.

Re: Beware of the perfect gentleman

#56

Post by willi59549879 »

diego_moita wrote: post #9

For me, the most fascinating part is about women refusing to accept they've been scammed or wanting a relationship with the men whose pictures were stolen, even though some of them are gay. It is quite similar to cult followers like QAnon. They want to believe desperately on what is comforting discarding what is reasonable. My Brazilian family of Bolsonaro supporters camping in front of barracks demanding a coup-d'et…

I guess a reason is the time they spent having conversations with that person. If you talked for a long time you are emotionally invested and don't want to let go anymore.

Re: Beware of the perfect gentleman

#57

Post by lelanthran »

ChrisMarshallNY wrote: post #11
imwillofficial wrote: post #2

I know it’s sad and scary to get death threats. But having a gay guy have a wide following of women in love with him is hilarious

> But having a gay guy have a wide following of women in love with him is hilarious Women loved Rock Hudson. I think there are a number of gay women stars that are quite popular with men. Social media is very weird. People can have entire friendships, romances, and work relationships, without meeting the other person. I had a friend whose wife left him for an online relationship. She got to the other state, met the g…

> Best thing that could have happened to him.

Yup. IME, the best way for a spouse to leave you is for someone else.

When they have someone that they're in a hurry to settle down with, they're unlikely to argue over splitting of assets, or custody of pets, or access to children, because they want the process over as soon as possible.

When they are leaving you because they are unhappy with you, then they'll argue over every single petty and trivial thing, and drag out the process for two years.

Sure, it may hurt more when you find out that they've been cheating, but that will still be less painful when they take out their frustration with you using the kids visitation schedule.

Re: Beware of the perfect gentleman

#58

Post by MikePlacid »

DoreenMichele wrote: post #45

My mind is blown. Even when the ruse is revealed, many victims are unwilling to let go. The truth triggers an emotional whiplash—the promise of a soulmate, a new, fulfilling life, and mutual trust is suddenly lost, leaving the intense feelings of love behind. Once found, the real man in the photos becomes a surrogate for the fantasy. “Some of them would reach out to me and [say], ‘Now that I know what the real person…

> Time to retire Cinderella and similar stories.

The article mentions Tindler Swindler, and I can vouch - it's a great film. It is an absolute puzzle at first, cause the man spares no money to trigger a Cinderella in the victims: real charter jet, real high-class hotel, real flowers and gifts. And she has 0 at her bank account - what the man that can burn more money in a day that she makes in a year may potentially want from a poor girl, financially? Then the puzzle is solved (but I will not spoil here).

The film moves slowly and shows how the girls were hooked. And you can clearly see that they have no defense. Absolutely no defense, except to kill Cinderella inside herself, and before the fact at that.

But is it possible or correct to tell a girl "You should never date higher than your own status (whatever it is)"?

Re: Beware of the perfect gentleman

#59

Post by shawn-butler »

From a technical perspective why isn't this a solved problem?

Identity will always be a difficult problem, but being able to own your own face / likeness by demonstrating it should be technically possible right?

Forced visual "captchas" something like "please take a photo standing on one foot and your finger pointed at your nose"

Then once you own your likeness with "faceID" likeness similarity isn't it then easy to monitor the images uploaded to the profile or am I completely missing something?

Re: Beware of the perfect gentleman

#60

Post by worthless-trash »

MikePlacid wrote: post #58
DoreenMichele wrote: post #45

My mind is blown. Even when the ruse is revealed, many victims are unwilling to let go. The truth triggers an emotional whiplash—the promise of a soulmate, a new, fulfilling life, and mutual trust is suddenly lost, leaving the intense feelings of love behind. Once found, the real man in the photos becomes a surrogate for the fantasy. “Some of them would reach out to me and [say], ‘Now that I know what the real person…

> Time to retire Cinderella and similar stories. The article mentions Tindler Swindler, and I can vouch - it's a great film. It is an absolute puzzle at first, cause the man spares no money to trigger a Cinderella in the victims: real charter jet, real high-class hotel, real flowers and gifts. And she has 0 at her bank account - what the man that can burn more money in a day that she makes in a year may potentially w…

You can always tell them, however most are told from youth that they should always marry upwards. Your experience may vary.
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