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Ask HN: How do you overcome feeling completely lost in life?

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Re: Ask HN: How do you overcome feeling completely lost in life?

#52
read books and workout. very simple. simplicity is the ultimate sophistication, as always. worked for me when I failed the national exam. worked for me when I was unemployed. worked for me when my startup almost went bankrupt the moment Covid hit. worked for me when nearly all my employees left. worked for me and my people every single time… hope you will find happiness and peace in life.

Re: Ask HN: How do you overcome feeling completely lost in life?

#53

My advice is this: Become a different person. Take your life and incinerate it. Not literally of course. I mean completely change what and who you are. You’re an accomplished software engineer at 30? Great. You’re done doing that. Go buy a $15k trailer, get a truck, and hit the road. Stop looking at screens, only read books. Stop working a job behind a desk, find something else, or if you can afford it don’t work at…

Sorry, but I think this is bad advice. It sounds wise and clever on the Internet, but in reality it's just an extension of the "consumer experience" mentality that leads to the society-wide feeling of malaise OP is experiencing. Because the fact is, doing a bunch of random things doesn't lead to any real insight about the human experience or what one's place in it ought to be.

Instead, I suggest that OP (and anyone else) delve into philosophy, religion, and especially the nature of capital-W Work, that being "What do you wish to spend your time doing in order to master it and grow into an identity as such a master?" The film Jiro Dreams of Sushi is an excellent introduction to this, but you can find similar mentalities labeled as "craftsmanship". The key point being that you need to create stuff (including your self) not simply consume it or find it out in the world.

Re: Ask HN: How do you overcome feeling completely lost in life?

#54
This might be overly pragmatic and underthinking things, but what worked very well for me personally is to make an account on meetup.com and go to random events (but of course things that you're likely to enjoy). Especially meeting up again with the same group on a semi-regular basis is very satisfying and I made a lot of new friends and certainly got out of the door a lot using this strategy.

Re: Ask HN: How do you overcome feeling completely lost in life?

#56

My advice is this: Become a different person. Take your life and incinerate it. Not literally of course. I mean completely change what and who you are. You’re an accomplished software engineer at 30? Great. You’re done doing that. Go buy a $15k trailer, get a truck, and hit the road. Stop looking at screens, only read books. Stop working a job behind a desk, find something else, or if you can afford it don’t work at…

This is the right advice, but few people will follow it.

Re: Ask HN: How do you overcome feeling completely lost in life?

#57
post #48

My advice is this: Become a different person. Take your life and incinerate it. Not literally of course. I mean completely change what and who you are. You’re an accomplished software engineer at 30? Great. You’re done doing that. Go buy a $15k trailer, get a truck, and hit the road. Stop looking at screens, only read books. Stop working a job behind a desk, find something else, or if you can afford it don’t work at…

This might sound kind of inspirational but as someone who feels similarly to OP, that's a long list of things that I would never want to do. I don't want to do anything - that includes the random list that you're throwing at the wall. It's not like I've always wanted to have a different job, travel or learn more languages and I'm too timid to try these things - I don't want to do anything including all of the things…

What would be a more comfortable way for you to approach new things? Serious question - you say you’re too timid to try these things, which I totally understand.

What do you feel would be an easy way to ease you into new experiences? Someone to help you along? An experience in a medium or setting you’re comfortable in?

This is really the big problem of our time. Old sources of meaning have fallen apart (livelihood, family, community) and I see so many people with a similar sense of emptiness.

Re: Ask HN: How do you overcome feeling completely lost in life?

#58
Jesus guys. The problem isn't the guy doesn't know what to do , it's that he's not motivated to do anything . In most cases you get motivated by doing, thats true, but know this : it doesnt matter, because you are Sisyphus, we all are. Find a struggle and embrace the suck cause that's all there is. Everyone has their delusions. My only recommendation is reading books you'll find that you re not alone and sometimes that's enough to feel just a little better to do something about however you feel.

Re: Ask HN: How do you overcome feeling completely lost in life?

#59
Newtons law of motion: Things will keep on going in their same staight line until you change it. If you keep doing the same, you'll get the same kind of result.

If you want to change, something will have to change. You'll have to do it yourself.

They can be dramatic or incremental - doesn't matter.

The difficulty lies in obtaining Motivation, from a world where everything is comfortable. Modern world does not really require you to do much, so your biology will always gravitate to the least-effort path. That's why McDonald's exists, or why people don't challenge their religious belief-systems.

Do something hard - because it is hard. And while doing that, think about how you're giving a big FU to society and your biology.

Anger is a really good motivator.

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