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Americans are choosing to be alone, but we should reverse that

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Re: Americans are choosing to be alone, but we should reverse that

#91

Post by gherkinnn »

ilaksh wrote: post #81
gherkinnn wrote: post #37

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I find this very hard to believe. Real interactions are so rich, how could these goggles even hope to get there in a few years? What is having dinner together if you didn’t even eat the same? And this is the most banal example I could think of. I’d sooner become an actual hermit than to share a soggy McD burger over VR.

No, its not the most banal, its the one that most obviously doesn't translate. Of course its not the same as being in person. But it can be much closer than people realize. As I said, eye-tracking will be built in, so there will be eye contact. The environment renderings and avatars will be realistic. You can already do really interesting interactions such as table tennis and tabletop RPG games such as Demeo.

This is like optimising porn over actually having sex. It’s ridiculous.

All the robots and goggles can’t hope to recreate the real thing.

And this is way harder to solve than dinner.

Re: Americans are choosing to be alone, but we should reverse that

#92

Post by EE84M3i »

I live in a big city, but I'm terribly lonely.

- I live alone. - I work hybrid, but when I go into the office, it's more or less empty and I spend all my time on zoom calls. - My family lives far away. - I'm single.

Most weeks, my only social interaction is at the local bar, where I'm a regular, or various dates from apps. Excesses of both of these is unhealthy in different ways.

I've been pushing myself to go to meetups and hobby groups, but my hobbies are mostly solo ones (probably a bi-product of spending time alone), and I have terrible decision paralysis. It ends up being a lot of work, and not at all something I'm excited about or that seems _fun_.

I don't really have a solution here, but something tells me I'm not alone in being in this situation.

Re: Americans are choosing to be alone, but we should reverse that

#94

Post by rubicon33 »

EE84M3i wrote: post #92

I live in a big city, but I'm terribly lonely. - I live alone. - I work hybrid, but when I go into the office, it's more or less empty and I spend all my time on zoom calls. - My family lives far away. - I'm single. Most weeks, my only social interaction is at the local bar, where I'm a regular, or various dates from apps. Excesses of both of these is unhealthy in different ways. I've been pushing myself to go to mee…

Sorry to hear about that difficult situation you are in. Sounds like it's more and more common these days.

If I could offer a suggestion... try a sport? Join a tennis club for example, and go to all the meetups.

If you don't like tennis, try something else!

Re: Americans are choosing to be alone, but we should reverse that

#95

Post by standardUser »

trophycase wrote: post #78
standardUser wrote: post #71

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What exactly is the "negative marketing" that you think is manipulating women into having fewer children?

How it's expensive, how it will ruin your career, how it will destroy your body, etc. Talk to gen-Z women, many of them are inundated with this kind of thinking.

It is expensive and it is true that building most careers becomes more difficult if you take extended time off. And some women do experience extreme changes to their body. That "kind of thinking" sounds entirely fact-based, not "negative".

Re: Americans are choosing to be alone, but we should reverse that

#96

Post by standardUser »

EE84M3i wrote: post #92

I live in a big city, but I'm terribly lonely. - I live alone. - I work hybrid, but when I go into the office, it's more or less empty and I spend all my time on zoom calls. - My family lives far away. - I'm single. Most weeks, my only social interaction is at the local bar, where I'm a regular, or various dates from apps. Excesses of both of these is unhealthy in different ways. I've been pushing myself to go to mee…

If you go to the same bar all the time and haven't made friends there, try a different bar. And maybe consider those dates as opportunities to make friends in addition to romantic pursuits. A lot of my social group connected originally via dating apps.

Re: Americans are choosing to be alone, but we should reverse that

#97

Post by cpsns »

EE84M3i wrote: post #92

I live in a big city, but I'm terribly lonely. - I live alone. - I work hybrid, but when I go into the office, it's more or less empty and I spend all my time on zoom calls. - My family lives far away. - I'm single. Most weeks, my only social interaction is at the local bar, where I'm a regular, or various dates from apps. Excesses of both of these is unhealthy in different ways. I've been pushing myself to go to mee…

I'm in a similar situation in a very rural area, except probably worse to some degree. I do have a couple of family members local, but there's no bars, zero dating potential, no hobby groups, and no events for people my age whatsoever.

I've seriously considered moving to a city, but then I'll have to lose the tiny bit of social interaction I actually do have, my family. In some ways I want to believe I could build a better social life in a city and be happier since there's more opportunity on all fronts, but I don't actually believe that would be the case.

I've never even met my coworkers, my social life is non-existent. It's actually crazy to think it's even possible to end up in a situation like I have.

The loneliness has seriously messed with me mentally at this point and I really can't see things getting better anywhere I am. I'm not sure I could muster the will to move at this point anyway. I think I may be too far gone.

I don't have a fix for you, but I completely get where you're coming from.

Re: Americans are choosing to be alone, but we should reverse that

#98

Post by EE84M3i »

standardUser wrote: post #96
EE84M3i wrote: post #92

I live in a big city, but I'm terribly lonely. - I live alone. - I work hybrid, but when I go into the office, it's more or less empty and I spend all my time on zoom calls. - My family lives far away. - I'm single. Most weeks, my only social interaction is at the local bar, where I'm a regular, or various dates from apps. Excesses of both of these is unhealthy in different ways. I've been pushing myself to go to mee…

If you go to the same bar all the time and haven't made friends there, try a different bar. And maybe consider those dates as opportunities to make friends in addition to romantic pursuits. A lot of my social group connected originally via dating apps.

I have some friends at the bar, and I'm definitely considered welcome as a regular, and always have a good time, etc. But they're mostly drinking buddies, and not much more outside of that, however I'd like to try harder to change that.

Re: Americans are choosing to be alone, but we should reverse that

#99

Post by wyldfire »

Governments should subsidize in-person interactions -- especially for adults. Darts, trivia, volleyball, book club, escape rooms, group therapy. These kind of things would help bring more people together and could help reverse trends of isolated experiences like doomscrolling, social media envy, etc.

Re: Americans are choosing to be alone, but we should reverse that

#100

Post by mym1990 »

daemoens wrote: post #55
mym1990 wrote: post #6

There is absolutely no problem with spending time alone, I believe more people should move towards a place where being alone isn't anxiety inducing(easier said than done). Taking a walk alone(no headphones, just your thoughts), spending a couple hours reading a book, going to a restaurant and having a meal by yourself, working on a passion project...these things can be really liberating! Instead our collective alone…

The issue is that people are not willingly alone, not that they aren't comfortable being alone.

You would be surprised how many people can't stand to be in their own thoughts.
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