The case against the Twitter apology and our culture of performed remorse
1–10 of 141 posts
Re: The case against the Twitter apology and our culture of performed remorse
#2Jimmy Swaggart wants a word with you.
Re: The case against the Twitter apology and our culture of performed remorse
#3The same can be said for things like diversity statements. You know exactly what you are supposed to say and any deviation will be punished . It’s just a formality you have to perform correctly.
Re: The case against the Twitter apology and our culture of performed remorse
#4Forgiveness as a kind of mourning makes sense, but is counter-intuitive.
I think we've come to regard "forgiveness" as inevitably ending with reconsiliation. But perhaps, more often, it shouldnt.
That is, forgiveness is how I see the other when I see them not as an enemy or friend, but as a tragic part of nature. I have moved on. Our ability to forgive has, perhaps, been distorted by the perception that it's an act of kindness. I think, rather, it's the most rutheless form of grief there is.
Another insight from the article is apology as a kind of non-violent humilitation. And the idea that apology even as a cultural expectation is somewhat rare and somewhat contingent on the era.
This, again, makes sense but feels counter-intutive.
What would a society look like which forgives without apologies? Perhaps one much better at moving on, much better at focusing on outcomes rather than obsessing about status.
Perhaps the "purpetrator" doesnt need to apologise, we can just forgive them and punish them at once. We punish not to humiliate as an act of vengence, but as a necessary step to a better outcome. Eg., firing a dangerous boss, breaking up with a partner, etc.
Re: The case against the Twitter apology and our culture of performed remorse
#5The same can be said for things like diversity statements. You know exactly what you are supposed to say and any deviation will be punished . It’s just a formality you have to perform correctly.
In other words, we tell lies, to people who pretend to believe them.
Everyone lies and we know it, our companies have mottos and everyone knows they’re fluff, and we teach kids to “thrive in ambiguity”, which is a beautiful phrase I’ve found on a job offer and which I have found symptomatic of our economy.
I still wonder what it was like to live in ex-RDA. Did people tell lies that others pretended to believe?
Re: The case against the Twitter apology and our culture of performed remorse
#6An apology is useless if it is not accompanied by a change in behavior. Actually, worse than useless as it is an insult. I know what I am doing is wrong but I am not changing.
Large public apologies are performance art.
Re: The case against the Twitter apology and our culture of performed remorse
#7The same can be said for things like diversity statements. You know exactly what you are supposed to say and any deviation will be punished . It’s just a formality you have to perform correctly.
In other words, we tell lies, to people who pretend to believe them. Everyone lies and we know it, our companies have mottos and everyone knows they’re fluff, and we teach kids to “thrive in ambiguity”, which is a beautiful phrase I’ve found on a job offer and which I have found symptomatic of our economy. I still wonder what it was like to live in ex-RDA. Did people tell lies that others pretended to believe?
ya
hehe
I had to be
it's what reputations are made of, to some extent
I feel bad for those who get f*** by it
by this dumb game we woke westerners play where we say all the right shiboleths and so everyone likes us
Re: The case against the Twitter apology and our culture of performed remorse
#8Insincerity should be the expected outcome from bullying people via socioeconomic pressure into making public apologies.
Forcing someone to make a public statement via explicit or implicit threat of loss of income or ostracization is playground politics for adults.
Re: The case against the Twitter apology and our culture of performed remorse
#9Earlier quoted context omitted.
In other words, we tell lies, to people who pretend to believe them. Everyone lies and we know it, our companies have mottos and everyone knows they’re fluff, and we teach kids to “thrive in ambiguity”, which is a beautiful phrase I’ve found on a job offer and which I have found symptomatic of our economy. I still wonder what it was like to live in ex-RDA. Did people tell lies that others pretended to believe?
ya hehe I had to be it's what reputations are made of, to some extent I feel bad for those who get f*** by it by this dumb game we woke westerners play where we say all the right shiboleths and so everyone likes us
Note to down voters: this is a (relevant) direct quote from SBF's interview in Vox. [0]
[0] https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/23462333/sam-bankman-frie...
Re: The case against the Twitter apology and our culture of performed remorse
#10Apologizing to a mob never makes sense. You just make the other mob angry and most of the current mob doesn't think you're authentic anyways.
Or, as the article says, "It was either not enough or, oh, my God, please stop.".
Trying to placate a mob is pointless.
Be authentic (apologize if you really mean it), otherwise stand your ground and stay still. The mob will move on eventually. They are fickle and easily distracted. If you stay still? they'll move on. If you dart around? You're a target for the pack. Let them find the next target.