> Add a feature that already exists to our app. How the hell am I suppose to do that... I don't know.
It sounds to me like this was the "correct" answer (from a perspective of "make the problem go away," not how things should be, ofc). Do a refactor of your source code that changes nothing, push updates with release notes saying "Major updates to UCG oversight system," email Anthony asking "him?" to review the updates addressing the problems.