391–400 of 464 posts
A former boss of mine, who was an extremely hands-off manager, and who was cynical and black-humoured about everything, said (only half tongue-in-cheek) that he didn't do Agile, he preferred the JFDI (Just F*** Do It) methodology. So I just f*** did it.
Alternatively, if you’re not fit for work, then don’t be at work? I mean, at what point is it over the line to be useless at a job you’ve agreed to do, and that you demonstrated competence for and interviewed for? Many times I’ve said things like “just restart the cronjob for this” or “just tag this issue to so-and-so if you can’t get it, they wrote the original” etc. I’m all for taking care of yourself, but if you c…
I’m not myself sensitive to the particular word “just”, but I do understand why many people find it counterproductive in many kinds of usage. Your examples are probably among the more benign: in the first, it seems a clear cut resolution; the latter usage is superfluous and has the same meaning without “just”. But your attitude is exactly what many people find objectionable. People who are fit, but who may be dealing…
Earlier quoted context omitted.
I changed the orientation of the PDF as requested. This did not add any white space next to line items, since the line items table uses 98 % width either way, unlike when printing from Excel I guess. This is what I tried and failed to get heard yesterday. Also now in Landscape the cover page header takes up like 50% of the page. But hey “just make it landscape”. What the client needs me to do, I suspect without being…
> What the client needs me to do, I suspect without being able to confirm because my questions are “wasting their time”, is give the warehouse a place to pencil stuff in next to line items. have you thought that maybe this is not the reason at all why they want this ? maybe they have a scanner somewhere that works better with the landscape format ? some regulation to comply with ? I find it absolutely insufferable wh…
Unfortunately the line between the two is very fuzzy, because every request is underspecified, and we fill in the gaps with context and guessing. And everybody has a different threshold for how sure they want to be that they understand the request, before they go off and implement their best guess about what it's asking for.
I thought this aversion was just my own insecurities. I once had a manager that used to start every ask with this. I finally shared with him that every time he throws the word "just" into an ask, it seems to minimize the actual work required to get X done. He acknowledged that he understood that things don't JUST happen, and to his credit, I want to say he stopped using can we just as his lead in. It be became. Can "…
i used my imagination and took that to be a very good outcome. can you confirm this is the case?
Earlier quoted context omitted.
I go with "my first impulse is to suggest..." which IMO adds the diplomatic nuance of admitting an incomplete understanding of the problem and/or the person experiencing the problem. You either get a "good suggestion, I'll try that" as a response or you get "you might think it's a good idea but I already considered it and XYZ problems occurred" and you can work from there.
Everyone here is looking for ways to make unsolicited suggestions in a diplomatic way. Even with extra language this can be irritating to reply to. I’ve learned to first ask if there is anything I can do to help, rather than immediately making suggestions. Often times people are doing just fine working through a problem, and may want to communicate the status without receiving advice on how to solve it. For interpers…
Often if I’m the person who is stuck I’m totally willing to let a new set of eyes offer all of the “obvious” things that have already tried, because while it’s usually just a rehash, there are occasionally “but what about” cases that haven’t been checked yet. And if we don’t find anything new, at least the helper is now up to speed on what’s already been covered.
For the case of helping someone with a technical problem, as author notes. words like 'simply', 'merely, 'just' are downplaying the person's efforts and inherently cause unnecessary strife, discouragement, resentment, etc. Sometimes, letting them work through it for a while longer on their own is the better course. In the situation where help is clearly needed, 'let's consider possible solutions' is a better entry po…
This really isn't better, it's worse IMO. In a situation where help is needed, obviously we're going to consider possible solutions. What do you think I think we should do, maybe pick up our knitting needles, or go run some water polo drills?
It's more condescending than "just" because it is dressing it up in intellectualized bullshit verbiage. Hey good for you, you're a walking thesaurus.
A former boss of mine, who was an extremely hands-off manager, and who was cynical and black-humoured about everything, said (only half tongue-in-cheek) that he didn't do Agile, he preferred the JFDI (Just F*** Do It) methodology. So I just f*** did it.
in the final analysis, was he a good boss?
Infantilizing your listener by continually attempting to neutralize your speech of any unpleasantness seems like a race to the bottom. In the end, we're all so fragile that nothing can be said rapidly, in jest, without having to first pass your speech through an internal thought police filter?
Alternatively, if you’re not fit for work, then don’t be at work? I mean, at what point is it over the line to be useless at a job you’ve agreed to do, and that you demonstrated competence for and interviewed for? Many times I’ve said things like “just restart the cronjob for this” or “just tag this issue to so-and-so if you can’t get it, they wrote the original” etc. I’m all for taking care of yourself, but if you c…
Related: if someone has a chronic condition, don't drop on them unsolicited medical advice, especially things like "have you tried yoga?", "you just need more sunshine", "you must try my cousin's healing tea!". You're not their doctor, and they haven't shared all the medical details with you. Your 3-second diagnosis is almost certainly terrible. They've heard it a dozen times already, and it's difficult and tiring to…
I've learned that 9 times out of 10, if someone is telling you about their problems, they really just want some understanding or compassion. I've found that instead of trying to 'fix' their problem with unsolicited advice, saying something like "Wow, that sucks, I'm sorry you're going through that" leads to a much more positive response.