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Talking to strangers can make us smarter?

bbc.com

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Re: Talking to strangers can make us smarter?

#21

Post by unpopularopp »

>As a straight white guy, I recognised from the outset that my interactions with strangers can be less fraught than they are for people who aren't straight white guys.

Classic BBC, everything is race and gender nowadays. Do people really live like that? Sexuality would be the last thing I think about when I talk to a stranger that I never see again in my life for 30 seconds

> Additionally, I strongly suggest men in my position be mindful of this when chatting with strangers themselves.

“in my position”? So straight white men shouldn’t talk to strangers, got it. Other races have to be mindful too?

Re: Talking to strangers can make us smarter?

#23

Post by Yajirobe »

conaire wrote: post #19
nicbou wrote: post #15

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's weirdly hard to compliment people, at least as a man. If you haven't warmed them up a bit first, it never feels right to compliment what they wear. On the other hand, people love hearing that they have a nice playlist or run a cool place. It's something we put a lot of us into, so being complimented about it always hits hard. Compliments are an acquired skill, but one that's so satisfying to use.

Try non physical complements, eg. I really appreciated the conversation you started on x, I like that we can really go deep and get into the weeds on topics, or even it's cool that you really know who you are.

So that only works for people you know or have interacted in some way. That doesn't apply to strangers.

Re: Talking to strangers can make us smarter?

#24

Post by webmobdev »

nicbou wrote: post #3

That was not an interesting read. The article stretches the information in the title over many pages, links to many studies, but ultimately provides no new insights.

You are supposed to buy the book to know the secrets. :) The article is still useful as it does a decent job of busting popular social perceptions in the west that often prevent us from socialising even to make small talks with strangers. Ofcourse as an indian, I didn't find it much useful - I grew up watching my parent's generation interact and socialise with strangers whenever and wherever they travelled. So I too have inculcated that habit. But I do feel it is a dying skill (and it is nothing but that - a social skill that anyone can and should learn).

Re: Talking to strangers can make us smarter?

#26

Post by AlecSchueler »

viach wrote: post #25

90% of times when strangers were telling me compliments it ended up with "street scam", iukwim

I'd also recommend that folks reading this remember not to put too much pressure on women when trying this out. They are already approached a lot and often will feel the need not to communicate their discomfort having had saying No go badly many times in the past.

Just remember that when you approach someone they might be uncomfortable even if they don't say that. Keep the pressure on yourself to end things, don't put it on the stranger you've chosen

Re: Talking to strangers can make us smarter?

#27

Post by alexmolas »

I read an article that showed that talking regularly to strangers and exposing yourself to "uncomfortable" situations can help you to reduce your "uncomfortability" levels, ie: you can learn to be comfortable in any situation by repeated exposition to uncomfortable situations.

Re: Talking to strangers can make us smarter?

#29

Post by dontbenebby »

I thought we're not supposed to talk to strangers.

What happens if someone says "Fuck you... pay me if you want to get smarter?"

Which things from kindergarten should folks ignore next, since lately it feels like this poster is told they're a communist if they want to be paid, and a Nazi if they say they wouldn't do that if you paid me.

Be specific because I am on the autistic spectrum, and sometimes don't understand things from... and I'm squinting at the URL there... Wales or whatever.

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