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Ask HN: How to find what I am really good at?

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Re: Ask HN: How to find what I am really good at?

#231

Post by roey2009 »

robertlagrant wrote: post #74
lucideer wrote: post #72

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Agree with sibling commenters here critiquing this for being an oversimplification- nature vs nurture is not a binary. But even aside from the core of the argument, I find your phraseology oddly formulaic. It's ironic you're accusing the OP of having a "fixed mindset" when so much of your contributed "opinion" is clearly copypasted from books. I'd suggest opening your own mindset to forming a worldview of your own ra…

Phrasing and mindset aren't the same.

They are more indicative of one another, than a direct analogy.

Whether you blame another, view some traits as faults, idolise some concept or are blind to some thing, all are appearant in your writing and speech.

Re: Ask HN: How to find what I am really good at?

#232

Post by kayodelycaon »

Mezzie wrote: post #109
kayodelycaon wrote: post #102

Earlier quoted context omitted.

ADHD is quite well studied. If you're up for it, there is a 2.5h video that goes into some detail about what it is and how it affects children. I found it quite fascinating and it helped me understand some of my symptoms. (Mine is comorbid with bipolar. Yay.) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSfCdBBqNXY

Quick questions, apologies if they're too sensitive: - Regarding your co-morbidity, how did you know/decide to seek ADHD treatment and diagnosis? Was it before or after your bipolar diagnosis? - Was there any concern about med interactions? I live with my sister, who's bipolar and we think she MAY have ADHD, hence my curiosity.

Always happy to talk, but I’m not sure how helpful I can be.

I was diagnosed ADD as a child (~6 years old) but I wasn’t correctly diagnosed with bipolar until I was 33 after voluntarily seeking treatment on the recommendation of my primary care doctor.

As far as treating the ADHD, my psychiatrist didn’t bother with a formal diagnosis. She just decided to treat the executive function issues I reported.

Medication is trickier. I can’t use the traditional stimulants (or caffeine) without risking mania and panic attacks.

So I’m taking Wellbrutin (an NDRI) which is both an antidepressant and a stimulant. It helps with ADHD, Anxiety, Depression, and sexual side effects from antipsychotics.

I don’t have any major side effects to report than increase in sexual function and keeping me awake for the next 10~12 hours. (So no afternoon naps to recharge.)

Re: Ask HN: How to find what I am really good at?

#233

Post by SergeAx »

Back when I was 6, then 10, then 14, there were some activities I can go for hours without ever want to interrupt. Parents shouted me to dinner, tried to reason me to go out, but to no avail.

These were constructing things (first from plasticine, then from MEccano-like sets), reading, and then hacking computer. Generally, those are still things I can do for hours and even days.

Re: Ask HN: How to find what I am really good at?

#234

Post by User23 »

triggercut wrote: post #222
User23 wrote: post #111

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm not making fun of anyone. My beliefs on the subject are informed by my own experiences and direct observation of others. I do have some concern about the long term effects of putting people on a close chemical cousin of methamphetamine indefinitely, even though it is, as I said, an excellent productivity booster for those diagnosed with ADHD. Of course it's also an excellent productivity booster for those who are…

>long term effects of putting people on a close chemical cousin of methamphetamine indefinitely What is your basis for this "concern"? Sure it sounds bad, but there are plenty of chemical compounds with "off by one" differences that have completely different effects.... that's just... chemistry. Just so you know, (depending on who you read) those with untreated ADHD may live, on average, 10 fewer years than the rest…

> Just so you know, (depending on who you read) those with untreated ADHD may live, on average, 10 fewer years than the rest of the population. So if I had to chose between your concerns and 10 better quality years, I know what I'm picking.

I don't have a problem with that.

> Where are you getting this from? Any papers? If this is the consensus then I really must not have been paying attention (pun intended)

The burden of proof is on them to show that they are not speculating. Some kind of repeatable physiological test would do nicely.

> You seem to have a lot of "observational" experience in a specific setting, but little more knowledge or understanding than the tip of the iceberg "top-5 symptoms". ADHD is an incredibly complex developmental issue. Look at the issues with ADHD and gauging signals from the body, how those affect eating. Look at various issues with sensitivities sensory stimulation. Issues with inhibition and how they permeate behaviours. Reducing ADHD to "focus" is like reducing baseball to throwing a ball around.

I may have confused you by mistakenly saying the brain is "complicated" when I should have said "complex." What I meant was mind-bogglingly unimaginably confusingly tricky and hard to understand. Also, I don't recall reducing ADHD to "focus," where did I do that? I'm quite curious, what are the top-6-through-10 symptoms that I should be made aware of so I can better understand?

> Maybe look into some of Dr Russel Barkley's lectures. Some of them are a little dated but mostly accurate. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzhbAK1pdPM&t

As someone who likes to learn with a bit of an interest in the subject, I'll have a look. Thank you for the reference.

Re: Ask HN: How to find what I am really good at?

#235

Post by scarface74 »

lnwlebjel wrote: post #200
jstrebel wrote: post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That is a blatantly false answer. Of course, there is an ongoing debate about nature vs. nurture, which means that the genetic makeup of the individual strongly influences the individual's life. Look at musicality, look at sociopathy, look at general intelligence - all areas where genes exert their influence (as an example). So yes, you can try to grow around your talents, and develop strengths there. But by the same…

Your response carries much too much confidence. There is no debate any longer - the story is pretty well worked out [1][2]. Nature only gets you so far. See for example how much top pro golfers practice (or musicians, or whatever ..). (Not that it matters but I learned this late in life and was able to apply the knowledge to make it near the top of my admittedly very narrow field). Sure, at the top 0.1%, maybe even 1…

This is clearly not true for anything where being the top C requires innate physical abilities. You mentioned basketball. But the same applies to anything physical.

My own little anecdote. I have Cerebral Palsy. This isn’t a woah is me statement. It really only affects my left hand and slightly my left leg. Most people wouldn’t even notice besides a really slight limp.

I spent 12 years as a fitness instructor as a working hobby. No matter how much I practiced, I wouldn’t have been able to do what other instructors could do. I synthesized my own none choreography heavy, fairly simple, very athletic style. But it got to the point that I knew I was the best that I could possibly be and I once my style started going out of fashion (step, cardio kickboxing) and the industry got to be more dance focused, it was time for me to hang it up. I also start focusing more on my career and my then new marriage and step sons.

During the latter part of the period when I was teaching, I also started running. I was decent - under a 10 minute mile up to a 15K. But every time I tried to push harder - either longer or faster - my slightly favoring my left leg caused my right leg (good leg) to experience problems or my left ankle to start hurting.

Even lifting weights, something I have always had an affinity for (and my CP doesn’t affect) and at my strongest I could bench press 300 pounds at 5 foot 4 and a weight of 175 pounds, I would never be able to lift what my 6 foot 3 200 plus pound step son can get to with much less training.

Re: Ask HN: How to find what I am really good at?

#236

Post by onemoresoop »

Read through some of the comments here and there's great insight from various vantage points. What I haven't seen and would love to add is that taking a break from a hobby or activity (which may be achieved by jumping to something else end back) is very beneficial. Coming back with after a break leads to a different insight to said activity.

Re: Ask HN: How to find what I am really good at?

#237

Post by markus_zhang »

I'm on the same boat. I even posted a similar Ask-HN a couple of months ago.

My understanding is I don't know what I want to do. I drift by and try to grab at whatever that keeps me floating for a while, and then drift away when it is no longer interesting.

I kinda gave up fixing this and believe it has a lot to do with gene or luck. Some people (think Carmack) just know what they want to do for LIFE so they start early, have laser focus amd achieve great things. They are born to do great things.

I gave up. I will never achieve a fraction of whatever they do even in spare time. Fuck it, I gave up. And I'm 40 so there is even barely enough energy to keep daily chores float.

Re: Ask HN: How to find what I am really good at?

#238

Post by kthejoker2 »

jstrebel wrote: post #60
kthejoker2 wrote: post #38

Separate comment: this question is framed with a fixed mindset and an unhealthy sense of what self-discovery is.l You "are" "good at" nothing. You are not a block of marble with David inside, something to be chipped away at until it is apparent for all to see. You are a ball of clay, malleable, reshapable and shapeless, fluid and formed, able to absorb new bits and grow into something wildly different, day by day if…

That is a blatantly false answer. Of course, there is an ongoing debate about nature vs. nurture, which means that the genetic makeup of the individual strongly influences the individual's life. Look at musicality, look at sociopathy, look at general intelligence - all areas where genes exert their influence (as an example). So yes, you can try to grow around your talents, and develop strengths there. But by the same…

Well this is a weird non sequitur.

Growth mindset has literally nothing to do with "top notch performance", or a guaranteed way to achieve success in any and every field of practice.

It's simply a framing exercise for how you handle failure and how you approach new topics and challenges.

And I will cheerfully disagree, many top notch musicians can't sing, and many great singers are no musicians. You could have been great - you could still be great!

But effort and persistence is a much wider gulf than talent.

Re: Ask HN: How to find what I am really good at?

#239

Post by ausbah »

noufalibrahim wrote: post #204
mightybyte wrote: post #50

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I heard someone say once that one of the best things that helped them develop a growth mindset was lifting weights. Consistently doing 3x5 heavy squats, deadlifts, and presses just three days per week will make a visible change in most people's body remarkably quickly. And seeing that change in yourself really helps reinforce that you can change your situation. I thought that was an interesting observation but I'd li…

One of the things with physical culture is how easily it is to spot bullshit. You can either lift X or you can't. You can either fight a round with a boxer or you can't. None of the handwaving and smoke and mirrors which are effective in intellectual disciplines work when you're facing a physical challenge. Things become black and white and success and failure are easily visible to everyone. Conquering that gives one…

>You can either lift X or you can't. performance enhancing drugs, bad form that may not be visible (ex it going to chest on bench), and what "lifting X" even means when the amount can vary vastly depending on number of reps and sets

Re: Ask HN: How to find what I am really good at?

#240

Post by kthejoker2 »

lucideer wrote: post #72
kthejoker2 wrote: post #38

Separate comment: this question is framed with a fixed mindset and an unhealthy sense of what self-discovery is.l You "are" "good at" nothing. You are not a block of marble with David inside, something to be chipped away at until it is apparent for all to see. You are a ball of clay, malleable, reshapable and shapeless, fluid and formed, able to absorb new bits and grow into something wildly different, day by day if…

Agree with sibling commenters here critiquing this for being an oversimplification- nature vs nurture is not a binary. But even aside from the core of the argument, I find your phraseology oddly formulaic. It's ironic you're accusing the OP of having a "fixed mindset" when so much of your contributed "opinion" is clearly copypasted from books. I'd suggest opening your own mindset to forming a worldview of your own ra…

Thanks for the patented HN contrarian view! :)

It's true, comment boards reward the "oddly formulaic" - cliches and well-worn passages carry extra weight.

They also lead to weird leaps of illogic, like your assumption I follow any growth gurus at all!

Happy to have a longer conversation offline if you'd rather address a man instead of a strawman.

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