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Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

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Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#141

Post by wiz21c »

Geee wrote: post #46
cortesoft wrote: post #26

Oh man this is such a perfect example of productivity porn. Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. I hate this mindset of “I am constantly working towards becoming someone else”. When do we spend time as the person we are? When do we enjoy the fruits of our labor? I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two…

That's exactly what the title means, no? If you constantly just work, you don't become the person you want to be. You don't become the person who enjoys life. If you are in the spot that you're not spending time as the person you are, then you'll probably want to change, and framing every action as a vote is a pretty good way to think about it.

except that election results are not often what you were voting for...

:-)

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#142

Post by nicbou »

wiz21c wrote: post #140
nicbou wrote: post #56

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The people who believe in these two-phase mentality rarely end up retiring early. They don't know how to relax. If you derive meaning from work and the accumulation of wealth, what do you do after you reach your happy number?

... and do you feel anxious not knowing if you will reach that number ?

I don't bet my twenties and thirties on reaching that number early. I'll get there eventually but I'm not in a hurry. I prefer living a balanced life now.

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#143

Post by Ruthalas »

MichaelZuo wrote: post #120
karaterobot wrote: post #96

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Describing any action as a vote about your future identity is a way of thinking about the world. It makes sense within the particular framework this article is presenting, but it is not a universally held belief, and it's not self-evidently true. It's a metaphor. Here's an example: if you choose not a rob a bank 10,000 times, that's 10,000 votes for not being a bank robber. Then if you choose to rob a bank just one t…

Choosing not to rob a bank 10 000 times still means you are a potential bank robber, like everyone else on this planet. At the 10 001 choice where it actually happens, this simply turns the potential to actual.

That is entirely correct, but it strains the voting metaphor a lot.

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#144

Post by antman »

cortesoft wrote: post #26

Oh man this is such a perfect example of productivity porn. Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. I hate this mindset of “I am constantly working towards becoming someone else”. When do we spend time as the person we are? When do we enjoy the fruits of our labor? I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two…

Every decision you make feeds and strengthens some part of your neural network.

Using the "Thinking fast and slow analogy" book analogy these are my geeky definitions:

Fast (automatic, unconscious) thinking is always a vote towards what you are and slow thinking is 50% vote for what you are and 50% on what you are becoming. What you are becoming is a combination of what you want and what your environment pushes you to. Abuse or hedonism makes you working towards places where you better not be. Forming a habit is moving an action from slow thinking mode to fast thinking mode.

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#145

Post by 1659447091 »

tamrix wrote: post #111
1659447091 wrote: post #106

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I believe it's more along the lines of "I'm having a conversation with you today because I value and care about you and our friendship etc; I want to be the kind of person that shows up for others and leaves people I interact with in a better place/mood/etc." Instead of being the person not aware of their moods and carrying resentment over the smallest slights so they end up bitching about it to everyone. If one neve…

Some people are so driven towards being productive that they think their time is worth more than others. Why should I waste my day taking to you when I could be working and being more productive? Eventually all your relationships, friends family etc are tied down to how much money you will be making with that time as it could be better spent working, making money . So sure every choice is a vote for an improved you.…

I can see how it is mostly viewed - even suggested - that way. I agree, these things tend to all nudge or write in a way that silently yells in that same direction for what "productivity" or "improvement" should mean. And I think we can end up taking those hints and running with it. It's exhausting.

What I failed to get across is that, if we read the subjective points with complete neutrality then the only thing really being stated is: what ever your purpose for doing something is the person you continue to become. Which, yea..

However, at its core it can be an actionable, and practical, statement that can simply be a reminder to be intentional in our actions. Advice completely devoid of the subjective judgment of that intent. But the energy needed to clean up the message to that point is not everyone's cup of tea.

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#146

Post by teleforce »

I bought two self-help books this month, one is "Atomic Habits" mentioned in the article, and another is "I Took the Only Path To See You".

There is one insightful short story about "The Tale of The Two Wolves" right after the Table of Contents of the latter book:

"One evening, an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, "My Son, the battle is between two 'wolves' inside us all."

"One is Evil. It's anger, envy, jealousy, doubt, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.”

“The other is Good. It's joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, forgiveness, truth, compassion, and faith."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: “Which wolf wins?"

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#147

Post by ratg13 »

stjohnswarts wrote: post #124
cortesoft wrote: post #26

Oh man this is such a perfect example of productivity porn. Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. I hate this mindset of “I am constantly working towards becoming someone else”. When do we spend time as the person we are? When do we enjoy the fruits of our labor? I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two…

It's one of those things to have you questioning everything you do of everyday. It's a bit much.

There is always a difference between what you want to do with your time and what you actually end up doing with your time.

Some people that have a larger gap here, likely could benefit from more mindful decision making.

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#148

Post by chii »

jrib wrote: post #127
cortesoft wrote: post #26

Oh man this is such a perfect example of productivity porn. Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. I hate this mindset of “I am constantly working towards becoming someone else”. When do we spend time as the person we are? When do we enjoy the fruits of our labor? I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two…

> see their lives as being two distinct phases I remember realizing this really early on because of how I played real-time strategy games like Red Alert. Hear me out... My usual routine was to grind collecting resources and building up the "perfect" army. This part was never really fun for me. It was most of the playtime. Then I'd take my amassed troops and wipe the map. This part was fun but lasted only a few minute…

The grind and building up of a perfect army (for the majority of the game), then wipe the map with it at the end, is only a strategy that works if you knew perfectly well what forces you'd face.

I reckon if you tried this with a competitive human player, you will almost certainly lose.

And i would imagine life is the same - if you laid out a plan and grind to get rich to enjoy it at the end, you are making the assumption that the world doesn't change under you in the mean time.

For some people, this worked, but i think increasingly, the world is changing faster and faster, and any plan that someone might make is going to crumble in the face of the "enemy".

Being adjustable on the fly, and changing plans and goals, as well as balance, is the key imho.

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#149

Post by rowanG077 »

jrib wrote: post #127
cortesoft wrote: post #26

Oh man this is such a perfect example of productivity porn. Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. I hate this mindset of “I am constantly working towards becoming someone else”. When do we spend time as the person we are? When do we enjoy the fruits of our labor? I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two…

> see their lives as being two distinct phases I remember realizing this really early on because of how I played real-time strategy games like Red Alert. Hear me out... My usual routine was to grind collecting resources and building up the "perfect" army. This part was never really fun for me. It was most of the playtime. Then I'd take my amassed troops and wipe the map. This part was fun but lasted only a few minute…

Interesting it was completely the opposite for me. I loved getting resources and building the perfect army. Wiping the map always felt shallow afterwards.

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#150

Post by the__alchemist »

jrib wrote: post #127
cortesoft wrote: post #26

Oh man this is such a perfect example of productivity porn. Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. I hate this mindset of “I am constantly working towards becoming someone else”. When do we spend time as the person we are? When do we enjoy the fruits of our labor? I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two…

> see their lives as being two distinct phases I remember realizing this really early on because of how I played real-time strategy games like Red Alert. Hear me out... My usual routine was to grind collecting resources and building up the "perfect" army. This part was never really fun for me. It was most of the playtime. Then I'd take my amassed troops and wipe the map. This part was fun but lasted only a few minute…

If you tried this on a human in any RTS:

  - Enemy would scout your greedy boom
  - Enemy would attack while you've committed to your economy instead of military or defenses
  - You lose
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