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Midlife: A Philosophical Guide

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Re: Midlife: A Philosophical Guide

#12
post #3

I wonder if the "midlife" part of midlife crisis does some harm. Other then me not being in my midlife (well i hope lol, don't think i want to die at 60) a lot of those issue resonate. Shrinking of possibilities, empty feeling as i pursue things. Ive felt this way on and off since my 20s and have talked with friends about similar feelings.

> I wonder if the "midlife" part of midlife crisis does some harm.

As someone who more or less started a midlife crisis last year, this rings true. Among other things, there's a social double bind that lies at the root of this that must be examined.

On one hand, young people are framed as unable to understand themselves and that they must suck it up and act like adults. On the other hand, when those that do "suck it up" later end up in crisis, they are demeaned with, "You should have figured yourself out by now."

I yearn for a world where midlife crises are a cause for community celebration. One where we can say, "Tayo42, this is an important time in your life and everyone is here to rally around you while you navigate these feelings."

Instead we seem to socially allow for, but discourage people from self reevaluations - that there's a window in midlife for people to rediscover themselves, realign their goals, and sort out their lives, but instead of celebrating, we discourage it. And for what? So that we maintain the illusion of some sort of identity integrity?

Maybe I have something to learn here, but it would be hard to convince me that the current state of the social response to crises is anything but maladaptive.

Re: Midlife: A Philosophical Guide

#15
post #9
post #5

I'll tell you what would solve mine. About $2m.

Pretty sure once you hit 2m it will then be 10m :)

I don't know, $2 million invested at 5% return would equate to a post-tax income of about $75,000 or so per year which meets the threshold level of being able to own your own home (in a region with relatively depressed property values perhaps) and engage in whatever (relatively low-cost) activities you wanted to for the indefinite future, be it gardening or programming or art or whatever.

Of course, that's all predicated on a stable civilizational standard which is not at all guaranteed these days, due to issues like climatic instability, social strife, etc.

Re: Midlife: A Philosophical Guide

#16
post #5

I'll tell you what would solve mine. About $2m.

You're weird if the possession of any amount of money actually solves a problem. I bring this up because I got advice long ago that if you think you need more money to be happy: 1. What you really want is what you can do with that money. 2. There's usually an alternative way to get nearly equal enjoyment for far less money.

I'm not fully convinced this is true when the problem is burnout.

Burnout recovery *requires* you to stop working in the area that caused the burnout; but, many of us have golden handcuffs in our job's income, so multi-year relief from it - especially if it allows us to buy a house so we have security - may be what's required here.

Re: Midlife: A Philosophical Guide

#17
post #5

I'll tell you what would solve mine. About $2m.

You're weird if the possession of any amount of money actually solves a problem. I bring this up because I got advice long ago that if you think you need more money to be happy: 1. What you really want is what you can do with that money. 2. There's usually an alternative way to get nearly equal enjoyment for far less money.

I agree with sgt101 though. You're right about (1); I don't dream of $2M in the bank, but not having to work for a living, and have all the time in the world to pursue my actual interests.

But (2) I disagree with. I don't have $2M but I probably have enough to retire in a shit country and live frugally (before you judge me: I was born and raised in a shit country, but managed to get to a better place, literally and figuratively). I'd have all the time in the world to pursue my actual interests; but at the cost of living in a shit country, having to worry about my physical safety or other similar concerns.

With $2M though (or more realistically, with $5M, but the point stands) I could achieve (1) in the awesome country where I live now. So yes, in my case, $5M in the bank would absolutely solve the problem.

Re: Midlife: A Philosophical Guide

#18
post #5

I'll tell you what would solve mine. About $2m.

You're weird if the possession of any amount of money actually solves a problem. I bring this up because I got advice long ago that if you think you need more money to be happy: 1. What you really want is what you can do with that money. 2. There's usually an alternative way to get nearly equal enjoyment for far less money.

Agency & control over own time costs about this much in a modern economy if you don't want to compromise on housing or having a family.

Re: Midlife: A Philosophical Guide

#19
post #9
post #5

I'll tell you what would solve mine. About $2m.

Pretty sure once you hit 2m it will then be 10m :)

Where's the savings sweet-spot at 35 for the security of not having to work anymore to avoid homelessness and hunger? $2M seems a little low, but not a million miles away.

Re: Midlife: A Philosophical Guide

#20
post #9
post #5

I'll tell you what would solve mine. About $2m.

Pretty sure once you hit 2m it will then be 10m :)

I like 2m ballpark as well. Pays off standard school debts, can purchase apartment or modest house, car, other middle class expenses, live with less fear of healthcare-expense induced bankruptcy, and have flexibility to work less. All without a dime spent on opulent living.
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