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Diaspora Co-Founder Ilya Zhitomirskiy Passes Away At 21

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Re: Diaspora Co-Founder Ilya Zhitomirskiy Passes Away At 21

#211

Post by necro »

dchuk wrote: post #127
chunkyslink wrote: post #115

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>> If you ever believe the possibility of something like happening is > .00001, do something, anything. If you don't know what to do, contact me (see my profile) and I'll help in any way I can. Its a nice thought, but people in this position often don't want help. My best Friend was doing a PHD in a Biochemistry related field at University College London back in 2003. He was an outgoing person, had a hot girlfriend a…

Unfortunately, an outgoing personality is a great way to protect yourself from people asking you the very painful question of "what's wrong"...I know now, after wrestling with depression for years, that sometimes it's harder to face your depression and explain your pain to others than it is to simply be depressed in the first place. What better way to defend yourself than by acting exactly opposite of how you really…

If someone is at that stage where you are contemplating this, here is a tip....just do it. By that I mean commit suicide of your _current_ life, not of life. Most of what weights someone down are the fears, struggles, embarrassment, your peer groups, jobs, etc. If you can't find a way through it, just leave it. Give all your stuff away, give away your money, give up your computer, leave your friends and family, pack a backback, travel to Africa, resign your life to helping others. Think of it as you ended your life and now you're just a servant to others. You don't have any aspirations of success, any ladders to climb, just live to help others.

Go without any plans, any future, just go and see what happens. You'll be free. It may be dangerous, you might not make it, but if your other choice was death the day before, then everything now is just gravy anyways. Don't worry about it.

This may sound silly and simple and extreme, but if you _are_ at that stage then this should be your stop gap. From now on when you're in that dark spot just think about when you're going to pull the trigger on this, not on yourself.

Of course there are lots of things you can do before it comes to this, but if you're past that, just leave your current life totally.

Re: Diaspora Co-Founder Ilya Zhitomirskiy Passes Away At 21

#213

Post by suivix »

mitsche wrote: post #190
weel wrote: post #164

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It is true that people his age don't usually die of disease, but that still leaves other options than suicide. The most common for males 15-24, according to http://www.worldlifeexpectancy.com/usa-cause-of-death-by-age... , are traffic accidents, violence, suicide, poisoning "other injuries," and drowning, in that order.

Traffic accident would have been my first guess, being the most common death cause amongst the people I knew. I didn't think of suicide till I read the comments.

CNN Money reports that it was confirmed suicide.

Re: Diaspora Co-Founder Ilya Zhitomirskiy Passes Away At 21

#215

Post by lgv »

eddiegroves wrote: post #130
robg wrote: post #108

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's not just our community. There are twice as many suicides as homicides in the U.S.[1] Yet, every nightly newscast is sure to cover the murders. How many talk about the suicides? Worse, suicide is the leading cause of death among college students [2]. It's an epidemic that no one talks about. We've already lost two freshman at MIT this year. [1] http://www.freakonomics.com/2011/09/01/suicide-vs-homicide-b... [2] h…

I'm not sure about how it is in USA but a lot of countries have strict rules around the media reporting suicides, so it is deliberate that the topic is under reported. Naturally a lot of people disagree with this and there's constantly heated debate on the future of the media's role.

I worked for a newspaper in Texas, and the editors told us not to cover suicides.

Re: Diaspora Co-Founder Ilya Zhitomirskiy Passes Away At 21

#216

Post by socialmediaking »

robryan wrote: post #161
eddiegroves wrote: post #130

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm not sure about how it is in USA but a lot of countries have strict rules around the media reporting suicides, so it is deliberate that the topic is under reported. Naturally a lot of people disagree with this and there's constantly heated debate on the future of the media's role.

Yeah, they are completely avoided in Australia, only time you really hear about one in the media is if it was a public figure. I don't really think this is the right thing to do, it masks that there is any problem so it doesn't get the attention it needs.

The more you talk about suicide, the more people commit it. It's a terrible conundrum in spreading awareness of how many people actually commit suicide. If there is a high-profile case of suicide reported, there will usually be an uptick in suicide and single car, single-passenger car crashes by people in similar demographics. There is an entire section in Cialdini's book Influence, on the social proof of suicide, and I just recently heard this Freakonomics podcast on the subject http://www.freakonomics.com/2011/08/31/new-freakonomics-radi...

Re: Diaspora Co-Founder Ilya Zhitomirskiy Passes Away At 21

#217

Post by pgeorgi »

eddiegroves wrote: post #130
robg wrote: post #108

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's not just our community. There are twice as many suicides as homicides in the U.S.[1] Yet, every nightly newscast is sure to cover the murders. How many talk about the suicides? Worse, suicide is the leading cause of death among college students [2]. It's an epidemic that no one talks about. We've already lost two freshman at MIT this year. [1] http://www.freakonomics.com/2011/09/01/suicide-vs-homicide-b... [2] h…

I'm not sure about how it is in USA but a lot of countries have strict rules around the media reporting suicides, so it is deliberate that the topic is under reported. Naturally a lot of people disagree with this and there's constantly heated debate on the future of the media's role.

Background to the debate (and the origin of the strict rules in the first place): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Copycat_suicide

Re: Diaspora Co-Founder Ilya Zhitomirskiy Passes Away At 21

#218

Post by mcphilip »

grannyg00se wrote: post #147
chunkyslink wrote: post #115

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>> If you ever believe the possibility of something like happening is > .00001, do something, anything. If you don't know what to do, contact me (see my profile) and I'll help in any way I can. Its a nice thought, but people in this position often don't want help. My best Friend was doing a PHD in a Biochemistry related field at University College London back in 2003. He was an outgoing person, had a hot girlfriend a…

Where does it say that Ilya committed suicide?

CNN Money says a source close to the company confirmed it was a suicide:

http://money.cnn.com/2011/11/14/technology/diaspora_cofounde...

Re: Diaspora Co-Founder Ilya Zhitomirskiy Passes Away At 21

#219

Post by [deleted] »

einhverfr wrote: post #100
tptacek wrote: post #78

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It doesn't take a special person, so much as it's simply the case that no matter who you are, your startup is likely to fail. When I was much younger and starting my first (fundably doomed) startup, one of my cofounders liked to say, "yeah, most businesses fail, but those statistics include companies trying to sell soft drinks to Eskimos and combination Chinese food/pizza restaurants". Then we'd all chuckle, knowing…

Actually I will take that further, as a small business owner. EVERY business fails. Every single one. Some businesses somehow manage to stay in business when they run out of money and keep going on until they succeed. However, that's what businesses are up against. I think going into that armed and aware is one thing that makes success more likely.

[deleted]

Re: Diaspora Co-Founder Ilya Zhitomirskiy Passes Away At 21

#220

Post by thomasgerbe »

ryan-allen wrote: post #185
LancerSykera wrote: post #181

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Suicide isn't a mental illness like depression and OCD and Schizophrenia. While I do agree that this isn't the best time for "ethical theory," I also agree with thomasgerbe in that suicide is a fundamental human right. If one has no desire to continue living, who are you to force them to?

Of course suicide isn't a mental illness. How about you have a look at some facts from the US NIMH [1], how about I summarise some poignant facts: "Research shows that risk factors for suicide include: depression and other mental disorders, or a substance-abuse disorder (often in combination with other mental disorders). More than 90 percent of people who die by suicide have these risk factors." So, you're happy to c…

"Have you known anyone personally who's comitted suicide?"

Yes. My cousin did by jumping and my sister attempted by overdose. Though I called an ambulance which saved her life. I won't argue that people shouldn't intervene when they can.

'I doubt you'd merely say "well, it was their choice". I bet you'd rethink your statement and your position.'

Not really. She's gone through a lot of shit. Meds. Psychiatrist. Friends. Hobbies. Boyfriends. Family. They help but they aren't the answer to everyone. And so if she attempts to commit suicide again and is successful I would be deeply saddened but at least know that she found a peace that she couldn't find in life.

Hell, even I experience that same lows. What is the point of having someone suffer through an existence which there is no solution that corrects the problem?

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