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On Being Rich-ish: Lessons I learned becoming suddenly middle-class

residentcontrarian.com

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Re: On Being Rich-ish: Lessons I learned becoming suddenly middle-class

#2
> Middle-class-or-better people don’t like to talk about money... You realize you are talking to people who have a problem you can’t solve for them.

This extends to not wanting to discuss salary with coworkers, by the way. The common conception is the bosses want to hold us down so they tell us not to talk about it. But I’ve been in multiple situations where I didn’t want to.

I knew I was making more, and it wasn’t because i was the best- in some cases I was lucky, sometimes I just negotiated better. But in either case there’s really no upside to disclosing.

Re: On Being Rich-ish: Lessons I learned becoming suddenly middle-class

#3
This is something I really struggle with. I'm now middle class, but the horror of growing up poor still sticks with me. I have severe nightmares about being poor again, I just can't go back. I tend to overwork, and hoard thing at times.

The most difficult thing these days, is my kids. I'm extremely happy that they don't know how bad things can be, but I get extremely worried by that too. I get worried, that they don't try hard enough because they don't understand how bad things in life can get. I get worried that they are far too trusting because times are so good and plentiful.

Life can change good or bad in an instant.

Re: On Being Rich-ish: Lessons I learned becoming suddenly middle-class

#5
post #4

This might be a very non American problem, but people forget that there are social pressures to follow when you are middle class that cost more money.

It's also an American problem. I notice it most in the pressure to have a nice front lawn. In some American neighborhoods, if you don't regularly cut your grass, people will call the police.

Re: On Being Rich-ish: Lessons I learned becoming suddenly middle-class

#6

> Middle-class-or-better people don’t like to talk about money... You realize you are talking to people who have a problem you can’t solve for them. This extends to not wanting to discuss salary with coworkers, by the way. The common conception is the bosses want to hold us down so they tell us not to talk about it. But I’ve been in multiple situations where I didn’t want to. I knew I was making more, and it wasn’t b…

>I knew I was making more

>But in either case there’s really no upside to disclosing.

There certainly is upside to discussing for anyone earning less than median. But as you write, as long as everyone thinks they are earning more than the median, individually they have no upside.

Obviously, everyone cannot be earning more than median, but more importantly, price transparency shows the movement of supply and demand curves, across industries and even across businesses in the same industry.

Re: On Being Rich-ish: Lessons I learned becoming suddenly middle-class

#7
I can relate to a lot of this, I was pretty stinking poor growing up. Now I make good money. (I still buy used tires from shady lots tho).

But even now that I'm making good money, it boggles my mind how richer everyone else still seems. Like, how do so many young people have a favorite island in Hawaii? How is everyone out there affording new cars? People actually picked a college major without thinking about cost?

One thing I have to constantly wrap my head around is that being broke doesn't correlate to income. I have a family and a mortgage and savings and nothing left over for luxuries at the end of the month. But someone working as a bartender can afford a new Jeep and go to Vegas 4x a year because they have a good roommate situation and they are due to inherit their parent's second house one day.

Re: On Being Rich-ish: Lessons I learned becoming suddenly middle-class

#8
> Food is huge here

I thought about that recently when I went to the grocery store - when I was fresh out of college, making ~$30k/year, I remember always going to the grocery store and keeping a running total in my head of how much I was spending so I didn't go over $70, since I knew my debit card would be declined if I did. Now I don't even pay attention to how much individual items cost - I just grab what I need.

Re: On Being Rich-ish: Lessons I learned becoming suddenly middle-class

#9
post #4

This might be a very non American problem, but people forget that there are social pressures to follow when you are middle class that cost more money.

In America, it can be all over the place. On one hand, the first time I had a corporate job I certainly felt very naked being the one guy with a ratty car in the parking lot.

On the other hand, you might have a CEO proudly drinks cheap beer and wears Kirkland Signature workboots to the office.

Re: On Being Rich-ish: Lessons I learned becoming suddenly middle-class

#10
post #4

This might be a very non American problem, but people forget that there are social pressures to follow when you are middle class that cost more money.

It's also an American problem. I notice it most in the pressure to have a nice front lawn. In some American neighborhoods, if you don't regularly cut your grass, people will call the police.

Participating in class signaling is optional, starting with the choice of where to live. I can tell you from experience that if you find the right neighborhood, you can have good access and security and not have to cut your grass regularly. It's a big country.
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