Isn't the average age of the founder of a successful company at the time of launching, somewhere in the 40s?
Ask HN: Will I Ever Recover?
71–80 of 97 posts
Re: Ask HN: Will I Ever Recover?
#72The only scarce thing is time, don’t worry, keep trying or not.
Much worse than failing is to feel miserable to have failed.
Re: Ask HN: Will I Ever Recover?
#73You have 7 years of experience now running a company with limited resources. The alternative is you worked 7 years in middle management somewhere. You picked up a very rare skillset here and have more opportunities than if you hadn't.
I think what hurts is that it's a form of death. It feels like actually losing someone, because you have lost a part of yourself. Companies grow faster than babies, and losing a company of 7 years could feel like losing a child.
Even if you go on to start another company, it isn't the same. It's like having another child or another spouse. It doesn't replace the first.
Whatever it is, you have to make peace with that. Go through the stages of grief. Do all the rituals necessary, which may be crying on the sofa watching TV. Just avoid hazardous coping mechanisms like alcohol and drugs. Death of an identity is necessary for the metamorphosis of a new identity. Don't try to figure out that new identity yet, but allow your startup founder identity to die sufficiently that it doesn't hold you back.
Your next identity might well be another startup CEO. But remove the old identity and commit to the new one. You want to be "Steve Jobs, CEO of Pixar" and not "Steve Jobs, former cofounder of Apple Inc"
Re: Ask HN: Will I Ever Recover?
#74You are not your job. You never were. Every single person on this planet has intrinsic worth that has nothing to do with what they do or how they think. You are important regardless of where you have worked. I often find the most painful employers and experiences are the ones that I gain the most out of in terms of development and growth. Not fun to hear in the moment but afterwards it's a gift.
> Every single person on this planet has intrinsic worth that has nothing to do with what they do or how they think What is it, then? It feels really contrived to say "you're worth something" but then not say what that thing is.
Conversely, one can say "you are worth $#!t" without weighing it or classifying it. Is that contrived? Not sure if that helps.
Re: Ask HN: Will I Ever Recover?
#75A little advise from a 48-year old one:
37 is really young.
I learned that I had to reinvent myself every 10 years as the "old shoes" didn't fit anymore. So from a perspective of a 37 year old you still have to go between four and six reinventions before you really can settle down.
So you still have a long way to go. And from the simple mathematics that you have more reinventions before you than you have already achieved you definitely can be count as "being young".
Re: Ask HN: Will I Ever Recover?
#76I did this.
At 37 I was marginally employed. In 2019 I was FTE at MSFT.
It was tricky but worked out
You got this, kid
Re: Ask HN: Will I Ever Recover?
#77I have this line from @alexwestco's Twitter bio in a deck of daily inspiration that my planner software cycles through: > Currently at $300k/yr with http://cyberleads.com . Previously failed with 19 products. Failing doesn't mean you're a failure . It's just feedback from the world that something about what you were doing didn't work. Sometimes it's product, sometimes it's marketing, sometimes it's behaviors in your…
> in a deck of daily inspiration that my planner software cycles through
OT: Would you care telling some more about details? How does it work, did you set it up yourself, how it's done? I am very much interested.
Re: Ask HN: Will I Ever Recover?
#78It is your identity and ideas about yourself which are shuttered, not _you_. Take care of yourself. << After writing this I realised you wrote, verbatim, "my identity has been shattered." You are not the idea of life you had. Among all things you want to do now, feel you need to do, etc., make space for taking care of yourself, maybe like never before. Unwind daily, relax, feed yourself properly.
Re: Ask HN: Will I Ever Recover?
#79Contrary to popular belief, the highest chance of success, and largest entrepreneurial successes, come from founders who are 47 years old when they start their companies. You are still 10 years away from the statistical "peak" to start your startup. Yes you will recover. This experience may be exactly what you need to become great. It's your choice to either hide from it and whither away in regret or face it head on…
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You say he's been lying about the laws, and for proof you offer the fact that no one's been arrested for it yet. Is that really how it works? If the government doesn't prosecute, then the law that is written should not be discussed as written?
Re: Ask HN: Will I Ever Recover?
#80Contrary to popular belief, the highest chance of success, and largest entrepreneurial successes, come from founders who are 47 years old when they start their companies. You are still 10 years away from the statistical "peak" to start your startup. Yes you will recover. This experience may be exactly what you need to become great. It's your choice to either hide from it and whither away in regret or face it head on…
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> Even earlier than that he espoused beliefs of yearning for the old days when a man could make a living for the whole family and casually beat his wife (look up his redpill fedora access/public tv video for this).
If you're posting such a serious accusation, you should at least provide the link yourself...