I applaud the author on being honest with herself about the downsides of WFH. I've worked from home a lot over the past 10 years. There's definite benefits and it helped me sometimes knock some shit out. In my experience, doing it day in day out is so difficult that very few people can do it well. I get why people want it, but like others pointed out here, it causes depression. There's no real boundaries, it's ground hogs day and self motivation starts tough and gets tougher. Its similar to the negative feedback cycle of feeling like shit and not wanting to get out of bed, so you stay in bed and feel even more like shit tomorrow.
What I don’t like about working at a remote job
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Re: What I don’t like about working at a remote job
#22No post body was provided.
Re: What I don’t like about working at a remote job
#23sounds like depression
as someone who has no problem with WFH, working from home for (and with) someone you don't ever encounter in real life can easily get people depressed. most people seek for meaningful relationships and purpose in life, not just paychecks. it's not people's fault if that particular way of working can lead to depression.
There are exceptions and I see how it can act as a sort of safety net group of acquaintances on which you can build... but for most people, work has got to be the worst place to find meaningful relationships and purpose, hasn't it? You can be made redundant in a moment and lose contact, there's money, an explicit hierarchy, and competition making everything awkward, and the purpose is usually questionable (hence the money)
Re: What I don’t like about working at a remote job
#24Working remote is for adults with established social structures, skill sets, and maturity. It’s not the ideal environment to start your career. What’s interesting is that successful fully-remote companies are full of emotionally mature and established people. This is a moat in itself.
Agreed, a lot more effort needs to be put into supporting people just starting out in companies that are remote. Too often seen it as a complete after thought.
I’ve been remote for most of the last 10 years but nearly all of my first 3-4 years was onsite in public service/government positions. I was lucky enough to be in an environment where giving time to younger staff was the norm and expected. I haven’t seen this level of support again since going to private industry sadly.
Re: What I don’t like about working at a remote job
#25Some people just aren't up to working remotely permanently. Those who need to be social with colleagues and this author says that when they mention they want colleagues to be friends. Not me. I want colleagues to be just that. I don't need to tell them what I did at the weekend as it's my business and I don't care what they did. Willpower is a learned skill that you can fine-tune so you are focused on your work. You…
+1 on the coworker thing, with traditional office jobs you’re friends with those guys and you’re close and then you or they change jobs and you never hear from them again. All along it was just being in close proximity and seeing each other every day that kept you together. That’s not friendship.
This ignores the large number of people who do find meaningful and Lasting friendships through their workplace, let alone spouses.
The number one place where Americans met their married partners was at work
It out ranks mutual friends, hobbies, and College.
Re: What I don’t like about working at a remote job
#26For many of these reasons which I also experience, I was hoping there'd be more of a blend of home/in-office emerge. Instead in both programming jobs Ive had post pandemic, it is all remote. I've met my workmates in person perhaps thrice despite working at the company for a year. It is surreal. > it feels like I’m living in Groundhog Day everyday. Every single day looks exactly the same This in particular, and it is…
Have you considered coworking at a closer destination? I've been working on distributed teams since around 2011, though I have been contracting from home for five years before that. In the very first distributed team I joined, the eng director made it a point to: - Have everyone gather in-person periodically by flying everyone to HQ - Making coworking spaces available - Traveling to the different cities to meet with…
Co-working is not a substitute for working with teammates. To give an extreme example, "Hey, I wish I had a live in partner who gave me hugs and shared in my ups and downs but I don't" -> "You could hang out at a coffee shop and talk to random people" (not as a way to meet someone but as a substitute for having a partner)
There's something about working on the same project, collaborating, brainstorming, in the same space, that is missing from remote work. Hanging out at a co-working space gives you the presence of other people but not the camaraderie of actually working on the same project.
Maybe if you never felt that camaraderie then you don't know what you've been missing.
Re: What I don’t like about working at a remote job
#27Working from home, or remotely is not for everyone - neither is being in an office.
Some folks thrive in an office environment, they value the things it provides - a schedule, a time, a reason to get up and out, socialising with others, being out in the world. It comes at a cost of time and a bit of freedom; you don't really get to choose the hours or where this happens, neither the folks you interact with.
Others prefer working remotely, they cherish being able to set their own schedule and work, and being able to manage their level of interactions with others. Remote work does not have to be work from home either, and the freedom this gives can be quite liberating.
There is also a somewhat of divide between introverts and extroverts between which they prefer, but of course - there are many in either camp leaning the other way too.
You just have to find what works for you - and that means trying both, or a mix, and seeing which one suits you best.
Where it gets rather frustrating for folks is when they are not given a choice - some companies; ergo leaders, can't wait to have everyone back in an office even after 2 or so years of being (mostly? somewhat?) productive during the pandemic; and this is where frictions arise. Other companies are entirely remote, and for those who thrive in an office environment, they will struggle greatly.
I'd love to see managers / leaders, and even employees recognise that individuals have preferences, and being accommodating of it to get the best out of their people, rather than imposing how they find they work best. How, or what this would entail, I'd have to give more thought - but I believe there are plenty of individuals with far more experience and knowledge than me around this topic who have been successful at managing hybrid (office + remote) teams, and accomodating individuals that lean either way.
Re: What I don’t like about working at a remote job
#28Some people just aren't up to working remotely permanently. Those who need to be social with colleagues and this author says that when they mention they want colleagues to be friends. Not me. I want colleagues to be just that. I don't need to tell them what I did at the weekend as it's my business and I don't care what they did. Willpower is a learned skill that you can fine-tune so you are focused on your work. You…
+1 on the coworker thing, with traditional office jobs you’re friends with those guys and you’re close and then you or they change jobs and you never hear from them again. All along it was just being in close proximity and seeing each other every day that kept you together. That’s not friendship.
Like you said, most of the time, you don’t get actual friendships with co-workers. But, being in close proximity, and sharing experience makes it more probable to foster friendships.
I had a lot of colleagues in my last job, and I have become friends with 2 of them. So the odds are not big. But it’s bigger than my current remote only job.
Re: What I don’t like about working at a remote job
#29They should get a dog - it forces you to wake up at a certain time - you get some exercise in - you go outside and have micro social interactions - if you take them out at a certain time after work, it’ll come let you know that it’s time, so you won’t overwork - they’re great antidepressants - great for company when your partner is gone 4AM to 7PM
I think this is good advice. Sadly in some places it's hard to have dog. Example, went to an apartment site, ~2000 listings available. Checked "allows dog", dropped to ~280
Re: What I don’t like about working at a remote job
#30Some people just aren't up to working remotely permanently. Those who need to be social with colleagues and this author says that when they mention they want colleagues to be friends. Not me. I want colleagues to be just that. I don't need to tell them what I did at the weekend as it's my business and I don't care what they did. Willpower is a learned skill that you can fine-tune so you are focused on your work. You…
This seems strange to me. hey, I'm going to spent 40hrs a week with others, let's make sure I don't give a shit about them.....
Vs, wow, I'm going to hang out with friends 40hrs a week. Sounds fun!
I'd pick the 2nd always. 3 of my best friends in the world are ex-coworkers and 1 more was a friend before but we started a company together at one point so we're we were co-workers. Another close friend I got managed to convince to come to the company I was at. We all had great times together.
It's one of the things that didn't happen at my last job and is certainly not happening at my current job with hybrid mostly WFH. Not making friends which basically makes work a chore instead of a party.