11–20 of 228 posts
I think it’s time to find some new hobbies. Find something that does inspire you. You know what they say about doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
If I was in an office all those days would just be wasted time rather than actually using it for living my life. I really don’t understand how people could prefer living in an office and pretending coworkers are their friends rather than on their own terms.
The upside of having easy days like this is I genuinely enjoy immersing myself in the challenge of hard problems once in a while, with full energy to tackle them head on.
Some people just aren't up to working remotely permanently. Those who need to be social with colleagues and this author says that when they mention they want colleagues to be friends. Not me. I want colleagues to be just that. I don't need to tell them what I did at the weekend as it's my business and I don't care what they did. Willpower is a learned skill that you can fine-tune so you are focused on your work. You…
I can't do much about having a harder time socializing and bonding with co-workers. On the distributed teams I have been at, there were periodic in-person gatherings (retreats, or everyone showing up for the same tech conference) where we can do things that is difficult by being remote. You'd have to take that up with your team and manager.
I can offer some words on some of the other things:
Probably the most important thing is to find and live in a purposeful way, whether that with in-person teams or on a remote-first team. That purpose is what gets you up in the morning, fuels your willpower and self-discipline.
A lot of people substitute external activity for that inner purpose. Unless someone has purposefully found a company whose mission aligns with their purpose, chances are, that person is using their job as a imperfect proxy for that purpose. That person, in having to rely on something outside of themselves to be self-disciplined, is not likely to do as good of a job as someone whose inner purpose aligns with the company's mission. I personally think this is close to the heart of what I see as malaise of modernism.
The other is that, if you can, try filling the extra time you would have gotten into commute to get to know your local community. Whether that is going to the coffee shop, volunteering for something local. I think a lot of people substitute a connection with their local community with their workplace. There's a sense of belonging, of place that happens in a company, at the expense of the local community.
If the local community you inhabit does not resonate with you, then finding one you feel you feel you belong to will guide you on where to move out to. It's helpful if you can find some place that is walkable, designed for humans to walk around, to live, to work, to play. Or perhaps, you find that you enjoy hiking and biking and outdoors, in which case moving to an area where you can do that would make more sense. Perhaps you enjoy being nomadic. You can make that happen with a remote-first, distributed team and a starlink subscription. Perhaps you like gardening or farming; working remote would let you work out from a rural area.
Finding the purpose within, and finding a community you belong to are things that, once you connected with, will endure through jobs in your career. Hope that helps.
I haven't figured it out yet, but certainly a standing desk is now essential for my mental and physical health. Again, it falls under the umbrella of movement. Joining groups (which are still around - meetup.com is still around but clearly getting long in the tooth!) is a good idea. Going out to bars can be fun, too. Just seeing real faces, hearing real words -- it's very refreshing and good. We've all been in solitary confinement for a solid chunk of time, so now that the pandemic is cooling down, it's time to revel a bit in the joy of other humans!
sounds like depression
most people seek for meaningful relationships and purpose in life, not just paychecks.
it's not people's fault if that particular way of working can lead to depression.
My situation is fully remote, however my home is my "duty station." I am required to work at my physical home. If I were in a position to nitpick my situation, I would really like to just be able to go to a public space to work such as a coffee shop, campsite, shared space, etc. sometime - just to interact with humans.
Guy sounds like he lives alone and is depressed. I have exactly none of these problems. Go to sleep by 8:30, wake up around 3 every day, no alarms, no explicit schedule, no planning. It's just habit. I don't need to find stuff to do. I keep the house clean. Keep my car clean. Complete renovation projects. I don't find it takes much mental energy at all to work out every day. What the heck else am I gonna do waking up…
Working from home solved my problems.
I do not want, necessarily, to be friends with my work mates. I have an other life, and there my friends are.
The person writing that article needs to go back to the office. Not me
- it forces you to wake up at a certain time
- you get some exercise in
- you go outside and have micro social interactions
- if you take them out at a certain time after work, it’ll come let you know that it’s time, so you won’t overwork
- they’re great antidepressants
- great for company when your partner is gone 4AM to 7PM
What’s interesting is that successful fully-remote companies are full of emotionally mature and established people. This is a moat in itself.