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A hookup app for the emotionally mature
51–60 of 66 posts
Re: A hookup app for the emotionally mature
#52Earlier quoted context omitted.
Um this is the golden age right now. I'm a middle age balding white guy and I can find more women who want me to top them on Tinder (let alone Feeld!) than I can handle. If you don't believe me, post a pic of some shibari and see what happens (assuming you have normal Tinder profile with face pics and you don't seem too weird). I'm sure you'd find the same thing. Fetlife is in trouble because of the combination of Fa…
Absolutely lol, I joke with my girlfriend that 50 shades of gray was the best thing to ever happen for my sex life. I had a Tinder profile with some kink stuff in my bio, my collection of gear/toys and (with her permission) a technically SFW picture from a previous encounter of a girl tied up and suspended. Went from a few matches a week to getting literally dozens a day as soon as I added that stuff to my profile, m…
Wow that rope is amazing! How did you learn to do that? :)
I don't even particularly enjoy shibari. But a pic of a single column on an arm or something is like a shibboleth that unlocks a whole world...
Re: A hookup app for the emotionally mature
#53Earlier quoted context omitted.
Um this is the golden age right now. I'm a middle age balding white guy and I can find more women who want me to top them on Tinder (let alone Feeld!) than I can handle. If you don't believe me, post a pic of some shibari and see what happens (assuming you have normal Tinder profile with face pics and you don't seem too weird). I'm sure you'd find the same thing. Fetlife is in trouble because of the combination of Fa…
I'm going to presume you're correct. I'd never tried this on Tinder, the place felt so vanilla I just didn't feel like it would be right doing such a thing.
Post a single column tie on an arm and see what happens. You can thank me later.
Re: A hookup app for the emotionally mature
#54Throwaway account for obvious reasons I'm on Feeld and wow the headline for article is a weird take. Compared to Tinder and Bumble there aren't many people (which isn't surprising) and it's very explicitly about non-vanilla sex, and I would never have thought that "emotionally mature" would characterize the people on it. I'm in my 40s and I have trouble finding people my age. It's ok if you want to find a rope bunny…
Not even going to make a throwaway. was intrigued by the article, dled it, set up a profile. Was excited to experience this sexual liberation where I could perhaps be an atypical cis guy...
It's just tinder for couples and kinks. The rest is extremely oversold. Glad the author got so much value from it, but what a disappointment!
Re: A hookup app for the emotionally mature
#55Earlier quoted context omitted.
I'm a pretty average looking white guy and I'd say you are completely wrong in your assessment. Have you actually tried this? It's true that women get a lot more approaches a lot quicker then men. But this whole "oh no I'm a guy the world is against me" is nonsense. You need to seem interesting in some way.
Of course I have. I’m an above average man in many ways but I’ve lived in Seattle and SF primarily for most of my “dating” years where men heavily outnumber women. Unfortunately add on - I am neither white nor tall. Nor muscular nor good looking. I am completely average in many ways superficially but well within the 1% in many others. I’m not sure if you live in the US but it’s incredibly competitive here for young m…
It's true that maybe it matters where you are. I imagine SF and Seattle might be different.
I was recently in for a bit and didn't have trouble getting dates on Tinder, and picked up a 26yo girl from Seattle in a bar.
I don't think I'm good looking, but I am interesting. I talk well with people both online and in person.
> Also - I take “average looking white guy” with a grain of salt.
Well thanks and I wish that was true. But balding, middle aged, slightly overweight computer programmer here.
I don't have acne I guess and I try to dress well, and like I said above I'm interesting.
I also taught myself how to actively listen. Someone once told me they'd met Bill Clinton, and he had the ability to make people feel like they were the most important person in the whole world when he spoke to them, and they said I'm like that.
I'm not discounting your experience and the stats that say what they do. But I know how bad I was with women when I was in my 20s and when I meet many guys who complain about this I see the same behaviors I had.
Re: A hookup app for the emotionally mature
#56Earlier quoted context omitted.
Um this is the golden age right now. I'm a middle age balding white guy and I can find more women who want me to top them on Tinder (let alone Feeld!) than I can handle. If you don't believe me, post a pic of some shibari and see what happens (assuming you have normal Tinder profile with face pics and you don't seem too weird). I'm sure you'd find the same thing. Fetlife is in trouble because of the combination of Fa…
I'm going to presume you're correct. I'd never tried this on Tinder, the place felt so vanilla I just didn't feel like it would be right doing such a thing.
Needleplay is definitely a lot more niche and you're probably
not gonna have girls falling over themselves to like you used to on Fet and AMM to do that specifically. I've found girls on Tinder are usually pretty inexperienced with kink stuff, and are more interested in light bondage and general dom/sub stuff, at least to start.
But also ran into some that, having zero real life kink experiences, immediately expressed interests in more....advanced I guess(?)stuff like CNC and TPE, so who knows though. The last few generations have had access to the entire spectrum of kinks, and photo/video examples of them in action, via the internet and they are just waiting for an opportunity to live it out themselves.
Edit -- for anyone reading this that may run into someone like me on Tinder, just be careful. I'm always sure to have long talks about limits and boundaries and expectations before any clothes come off, but there's tons of creeps out there that will take advantage of your youth/inexperience to try and push your boundaries, or make you do things your not comfortable with. No means no, anyone not respecting your limits isn't someone you need to fuck with The second anything like that happens or they try to guilt you for saying no to something, you need to shut things down and leave right then. Don't let them use kink stuff as a cover to abuse or exploit you. Be smart, be safe.
Re: A hookup app for the emotionally mature
#57Earlier quoted context omitted.
Of course I have. I’m an above average man in many ways but I’ve lived in Seattle and SF primarily for most of my “dating” years where men heavily outnumber women. Unfortunately add on - I am neither white nor tall. Nor muscular nor good looking. I am completely average in many ways superficially but well within the 1% in many others. I’m not sure if you live in the US but it’s incredibly competitive here for young m…
It's true that maybe it matters where you are. I imagine SF and Seattle might be different. I was recently in for a bit and didn't have trouble getting dates on Tinder, and picked up a 26yo girl from Seattle in a bar. I don't think I'm good looking, but I am interesting . I talk well with people both online and in person. > Also - I take “average looking white guy” with a grain of salt. Well thanks and I wish that wa…
> I don't think I'm good looking, but I am interesting. I talk well with people both online and in person.
If only online dating relied on talking to get a match. Instead it relies on - hmm - your photos to get a match.
Why is this so hard for older men to get? This is a repeated issue on HN. Like you use the app - you realize the photos are the most important thing. Just face it / you’re more physically attractive than you likely realize. Most men in the USA don’t get matches - let alone messages.
Re: A hookup app for the emotionally mature
#58Psychonaut,eco-sexual,digisexual. Lots of new words, I would love to learn about these people (not their sex stuff, but them as a person).
The ability to "explore" like this and western sexuality in general, I wonder if it is a product of better resource scarcity (due to capitalism or whatever economic force)? Would this be possible under conditions of economic strain or poverty, I don't mean relative to others in a society but at a global scale. Food, health care, employment opportunities, time-saving technologies,etc... to the point where universal basic income is a serious topic. Does all this empower sexual exploration? I think so.
Re: A hookup app for the emotionally mature
#59Title is kinda garbage. What Hinge is to OkCupid - Feeld is to FetLife. That's what I've gathered from the queer people in my life. I find these articles written by (mostly) women who get such easy access to sex to be a bit... cringey. It's often written in such a way that clearly shows a privilege that is basically completely unknown to them. Akin to being rich and being unaware most people can't just ask their pare…
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Re: A hookup app for the emotionally mature
#60Lol, within the first paragraph, we have the words "heteronormative", "prosecco", and a reference to 1Q84.
This is a lifestyle ad-piece. And what a bullshit lifestyle! Does she not even know that 1Q84 is Haruki Murakami's worst book?