Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Ask HN: What are the benefits to having children nowadays?

news.ycombinator.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

41–50 of 139 posts

Re: Ask HN: What are the benefits to having children nowadays?

#41

Post by dspillett »

sforza wrote: post #15
speedgoose wrote: post #7

It gives a meaning to your life, if work or saving the world is not doing it.

So then you choose to procreate to create meaning, and your child grows up, finds meaning lacking, and therefore chooses to procreate...

The other circle of life!

Society needs a new influx of kids all the time to replace those leaving or those looking after those soon to be leaving, so we have a biological drive to procreate like any other animal. Our use of technology and other knowledge to improve our survival rates has led to an over-population/resource-overuse issue, but that is a different discussion.

Our mental development means that we have other drives which can override the biological signals that tell us to procreate (or lead us to enjoy practise sessions and accidentally do the real thing!), or reduce the risk of unintended procreation, so unlike pretty much all the other life forms on the planet we don't have to.

If you don't want to, don't. Though if you have a partner who wants to, then things get more complicated, perhaps you are (no longer) well suited as partners?

Re: Ask HN: What are the benefits to having children nowadays?

#42

Post by sforza »

willcipriano wrote: post #23

> both parents will need to work to fund raising a child, so the mother necessarily has to do 1.5 or 2 full-time jobs Doesn't need to be true. A woman can take a year off or so to breastfeed and recover from the birth, at that point you can send the kid to daycare and split the child care duties. In my house my wife prefers the child care stuff so I pitch in by doing most of the other household chores, but since my d…

> It isn't overpopulated with people like your children will grow up to be. Children in the west benefit from public health measures and educational opportunities that will potentially enable them to be net contributors to solutions for overpopulation. The world can't be overpopulated with geniuses, with enough of them we can make new worlds.

Yes but given that unintelligent people are multiplying themselves at a much faster rate than intelligent people, do you really think your one or two intelligent children will have much of an impact on the world? It's wishful thinking.

Re: Ask HN: What are the benefits to having children nowadays?

#44

Post by silicon2401 »

LewisVerstappen wrote: post #8
sforza wrote: post #5

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I mean, if you want the kind of job that can afford the house with the white picket fence and 2.5 children (and not putting yourself into dangerous levels of debt), the level of competition for such a job is fierce.

That's not true in the slightest. In fact, it's far, far easier to make money now with the internet. You can build a tool and have millions of people use it instantly and there are far more ways to make $ than ever (creator economy). Just look on twitter and you'll find loads of 20 year olds making 6 figures out of their college dorms with different kinds of internet products. I saw a thread yesterday from some 19 ye…

This comment is incredibly utopian lol. I wonder where you're coming from to think these claims are reasonable. The kids who make it big with startups or some really smart people who can get a job at faang in less than half a year are a tiny fraction of the population

Re: Ask HN: What are the benefits to having children nowadays?

#45

Post by replicatorblog »

My nine-year-old daughter has had cancer and been diagnosed with epilepsy and high-functioning autism. Despite these challenges...

+ Being a parent is fun. Kids are super funny. Teaching them stuff is a treat, and seeing their interests emerge is a wonderful feeling. Assuming you love your spouse, you get to see this chimera of the best parts of you and your partner walking around in the world.

+ Kids are also familial and social glue. Even if you live a ways from parents, it's an easy excuse to stay in touch, a place to plan trips. One of the crazy things that as your kids grow they look and sound like different relatives. It's a cool experience.

+ Selfishly, it's nice knowing you'll have some influence on the world, no matter how small, after you pass.

I'm know some childless billionaires and honestly I wouldn't trade the decade-long headstart I've had with my daughter and her brother for all their worldly fun. Everything people say about parenting being the best thing you'll ever do is right – and they're underselling it.

FWIW, I understand the cynicism. You seem like someone who has suffered through tough times. I hope you find peace.

Re: Ask HN: What are the benefits to having children nowadays?

#46

Post by the_third_wave »

It sounds like you don't want to have children and are trying to justify that choice. While I can unequivocally state that I never had any regret having - as in fathering and raising - children I will not try to convince you of the error in your ways. If you don't want to have children, don't have them - it will give you the opportunity to dedicate your life to yourself and it will spare your not-to-be-born children a parent who regrets their appearance in their lives.

...or maybe... there is something beyond a life of self-indulgence after all? Maybe the sacrifice in time - which is the largest sacrifice, all that money-talk is secondary in my opinion - is worth the gains? You might have to skip a few festivals and you might not always have the latest iGadget but you will not miss these because you have far more interesting and challenging prospects, namely the raising of the next generation.

Re: Ask HN: What are the benefits to having children nowadays?

#47

Post by dragonwriter »

andrewclunn wrote: post #28

Because the people who don't consider the long term ramifications of having children are still breeding, so the trajectory of humanity (compounded even more by social safety nets) is now toward R style reproduction (aka "spray and pray"). So if you are concerned about the future of humanity, having at least one child that you raise well (assuming you have no genetic diseases) is a large portion of your contribution t…

> Because the people who don't consider the long term ramifications of having children are still breeding, so the trajectory of humanity (compound even more by social safety nets) is now toward R style reproduction (aka "spray and pray").

Except that it's factually the opposite: numbers of children per family are declining, and that's especially the case in places with strong social safety nets because descendants are no longer the best form of old age insurance.

Humanity is becoming even more consistently k-strategist.

Re: Ask HN: What are the benefits to having children nowadays?

#48

Post by throw93232 »

Raising kids with remote work is easy and relatively affordable. If raised correctly, kids do not give much troubles.

Kids are handicap, but people tend to fill void with other handicaps (alcohol, chasing skirt...).

But it is big decision and very long run. You should not make any compromises on partner (even before you start). Marrying woman over 24, with debt or mental issues should be deal breaker.

Re: Ask HN: What are the benefits to having children nowadays?

#49

Post by Dudeman112 »

You'll find that most decisions aren't made as a result of deliberate thought

As far as I have seen people mainly pop kids because they want to (the same way people who are hungry want food regardless of any knowledge about nutrition), because they want their kids to deal with their old age crap instead of dealing with it on their own, or because it's the usual path laid by the environment

If you don't wanna drink soda then just don't drink it

Post reply on HN