Understanding how others relate to you
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Re: Understanding how others relate to you
#2Interesting metaphor - I'd argue that Rationals, even with mutual respect, are more likely to become Shapeshifters than Blinds.
Also
> The pressures of life can mean that we rarely make time for [Blinds], but it can leave you uplifted.
The reason people become close to you and unconditionally love you are usually because you spent a lot of time with them. Even if the time spent attenuates a bit, it's not "rare" to continue seeing them, and if it were, the relationship would atrophy eventually and they would drop out of "Blind" status.
Re: Understanding how others relate to you
#3Anytime you have distinct categories, remember that the model is an over-simplification.
Re: Understanding how others relate to you
#4Anytime you have distinct categories, remember that the model is an over-simplification.
Almost all models are oversimplifications. That's the reason it's a model
Re: Understanding how others relate to you
#5This model is pretty ham-fisted.
The "Blinds" are described as a cult, and a permanent status that endures any level of neglect or separation. In reality, it's extremely common for your unconditional love BFF's to drift away as the relationship atrophies. It's called your 30's and 40's.
MUST the third group of "Shapeshifters" ALL be Machiavellian? Careerists, seeking only to use you for your position and influence? Does this category even exist then, for the overwhelming majority of us who don't have much position or influence? This sounds like category for managers and LinkedIn junkies, not individual contributors and normal humans.
Where is the "Casual Acquaintance" category? The one that honestly describes 90% or more of our interpersonal relationships? The scale REALLY goes from blind devotion, to deep respect for you and your values, to backstabbing work colleagues, to outright "Haters"?
Nonsense.
Re: Understanding how others relate to you
#6Re: Understanding how others relate to you
#7Re: Understanding how others relate to you
#8I think this model is over-simplified and not useful. The main problem in my opinion is that it's one sided.
A good question to ask would be what is your label in how you relate to someone else - I think almost no-one would label themselves as a 'Shapeshifter' or 'Hater'. Even if you didn't like someone, you wouldn't say that you are a hater, but you are being rational in your dislike for them.
Re: Understanding how others relate to you
#9This model is pretty ham-fisted. The "Blinds" are described as a cult, and a permanent status that endures any level of neglect or separation. In reality, it's extremely common for your unconditional love BFF's to drift away as the relationship atrophies. It's called your 30's and 40's. MUST the third group of "Shapeshifters" ALL be Machiavellian? Careerists, seeking only to use you for your position and influence? D…
> The "Blinds" are described as a cult, and a permanent status that endures any level of neglect or separation. In reality, it's extremely common for your unconditional love BFF's to drift away as the relationship atrophies. It's called your 30's and 40's.
I agree with this sentiment. All relationships are “rational”, in the sense that there has to be some commonality between friends. For instance, a commonality I had and still have with my friend from college is talking about business/finance with. Even though the relationship has frayed due to geographic separation, the commonality still remains, making reconnecting a lot easier. On the other hand, a work colleague I used to hang out with daily, we don’t have any commonality anymore, even though geographically he lives close, like 10 mins away by highway.
Re: Understanding how others relate to you
#10[deleted]