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Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

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Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#131

Post by hnhg »

actfrench wrote: post #57
hprotagonist wrote: post #14

What stops me is that the socialization and peer-group relationship skills that are obtained rapidly in a public school context are not replicatable at home. Neither are the skills learned in dealing with non-family adults, independence of task skills away from home, and much else besides in that vein. I would rather -- and do -- support the public school system in my (medium sized) city.

It’s interesting because I actually have observed that homeschooling, especially in large urban areas, is much more social than school. A huge number of families opt out of public school because of racism and bullying. Just like families can design their child’s education, they can design their social experiences. School is a socially engineered environment with little opportunity for organic play. In traditional sch…

I'm wondering about the economics of a household that can afford to have at least one non-working parent in San Francisco, and can maintain all those activities for their children. To me, this reads like a schedule for the children of the particularly wealthy. No one that I know who lives with kids in the vicinity could afford this.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#132

Post by wcarss »

kitsunesoba wrote: post #113
ElijahLynn wrote: post #108

Social needs. Children need to learn how to be in relationship with others, it is the most fundamental need we have and is so important for the future of our planet. If I were to homeschool, it isn't about the learning, that is easy, it is about providing an environment where children can learn to co-exist with others. That can still be done with homeschool, but it will need to be intentional with daily activities th…

As someone who was homeschooled for the majority of my childhood, I fully agree. I was able to somewhat overcome the resulting lack of social development in late high school (which wasn’t at home) and uni, but it wouldn’t be until some time between my mid 20s and early 30s that I felt like a mostly socially functional adult, and I still feel inadequacies in that department even now. Additionally, I don’t know that I’…

> but it wouldn’t be until some time between my mid 20s and early 30s that I felt like a mostly socially functional adult

Just for the record, it's also common for people who attended school to not be really socially functional adults until their 20s-30s (hi!), and many people also never really even manage to realize this about themselves, so you're not necessarily worse off than an average non-homeschooled kid here.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#133

Post by kennywinker »

_dain_ wrote: post #115
kennywinker wrote: post #12

In my experience, both direct and indirect, homeschooling has the effect of concentrating a parent’s influence on their children’s lives / brain development / psychology, etc. Take that, and think about it, before you start. If you have unexamined issues like anger problems, fixations, avoidances, fears - those will have an impact on your child, and a bigger impact if you homeschool your child - purely on the basis o…

Now do this for the influence of the state's pathologies on public schoolkids.

Im focusing on the problems with homeschooling because I believe that if you’re considering homeschooling, you are probably well aware of those pathologies. You probably have lived experience of them, since odds are you went to school.

The other reason is I don’t have direct experience of the pathologies of the school system - so if someone is going to speak about them it shouldn’t be me.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#134

Post by juve1996 »

gnicholas wrote: post #64
na85 wrote: post #36

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I was a camp counselor for many years in my teens and into my twenties. We could always-- always --tell which kids were the homeschooled kids.

Whatever selection biases there may have been in the past, homeschooling is becoming much more popular now. COVID and remote school pulled back the curtain on the type and amount of learning that is happening in public schools, and parents of all types are opting out of the system. What we are seeing now is a seismic shift that will result in a much more mainstream population of homeschooled kids. I doubt it will be…

Can you provide data to back this claim?

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#135

Post by thescriptkiddie »

I know you asked for responses from people who are interested in homeschooling and this comment is going to come across as unnecessarily adversarial, but...

Homeschooling is very bad and should be banned in the US, as it already is in many other countries.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#137

Post by devwastaken »

ElijahLynn wrote: post #108

Social needs. Children need to learn how to be in relationship with others, it is the most fundamental need we have and is so important for the future of our planet. If I were to homeschool, it isn't about the learning, that is easy, it is about providing an environment where children can learn to co-exist with others. That can still be done with homeschool, but it will need to be intentional with daily activities th…

This is unfortunately all too true. I have relatives that like to think they're exempt from society (witnesses) and pushed that onto their kids, those kids are almost 18 and cannot carry out basic conversations. They are socially about 12 or less. They will never be able to leave home nor persue their own interests.

Home schooling works better when kids have at least had elementary schooling. High school I would argue is where things break down a lot, and for some students there isn't a social experience outside of constant bullying and stress over things that don't matter.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#138

Post by kennywinker »

ComradePhil wrote: post #124
_dain_ wrote: post #115

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Now do this for the influence of the state's pathologies on public schoolkids.

Quoted post unavailable.

That is an insane thing to say. Qanon level insanity. Trans activism is big pharma selling HRT to kids? First off, HRT is expensive, but not that expensive. Whatever made up narrative you have for them convincing kids to support trans people would be entirely too expensive to justify. Second, trans people have existed for MUCH MUCH longer than pharmaceutical companies have existed.

Edit: oh, this poster thinks hitler was an admirable figure. Ok, nevermind, no need to entertain their words anymore: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=31722179

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#139

Post by andresgaitan »

kitsunesoba wrote: post #113
ElijahLynn wrote: post #108

Social needs. Children need to learn how to be in relationship with others, it is the most fundamental need we have and is so important for the future of our planet. If I were to homeschool, it isn't about the learning, that is easy, it is about providing an environment where children can learn to co-exist with others. That can still be done with homeschool, but it will need to be intentional with daily activities th…

As someone who was homeschooled for the majority of my childhood, I fully agree. I was able to somewhat overcome the resulting lack of social development in late high school (which wasn’t at home) and uni, but it wouldn’t be until some time between my mid 20s and early 30s that I felt like a mostly socially functional adult, and I still feel inadequacies in that department even now. Additionally, I don’t know that I’…

I went to normal school and university, and despite this I still feel socially ackward.

I always blamed my dad, and my raising for my problems. My problems started being solved when I forgave my dad, and all the people that hurt me in the past.

I had to take responsibility and stop blaming others for my problems.

For homeschooled people I believe it is very tempting to blame homeschooling for their problems. It is too convenient. I don't know how to speak to women, homeschool problem. I don't know how to socialize, homeschool problem. I am alone, homeschool problem. Beware its not your case. Regards.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#140

Post by xpe »

_dain_ wrote: post #117
idle_zealot wrote: post #110

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> taught me to honor my parents, taught me the value of tradition, morality, spirituality Those do not sound positive at all. It sounds like you were successfully sheltered from secular and liberal ideas by traditional and conservative parents, which matches with my preconceptions of homeschooling.

Or equivalently, state-run schooling successfully alienated you from these important values.

No, these two views are not even close to equivalent. Why? Liberalism and pluralism do not attempt to deny other ways of life or philosophies. (They may criticize them, but they do not claim to have absolute truth.)

On the other hand, many dogmatic religions want to protect children from influences they cannot control or understand.

Studying many different philosophies leads some to conclude relativism is correct. But I disagree, as do many philosophers and ethicists. Why? There is a simple answer that captures the essence of it: start by letting in all ways of life and worldviews into a pluralistic society. Treat this as an experiment and see which philosophies do not respect the others. It is abundantly clear that some ways of life are incompatible with pluralism -- e.g. some are authoritarian, some are unnecessarily violent, some restrict freedom of thought, etc.

P.S. Homeschooling has a demonstrated connection to religious conservatives.

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