Thank you. Now I better come up with a good answer, eh?
But I'm afraid I don't have a better answer than that it seems to be a constant struggle. As Feynman said, "The first rule is not to fool yourself. And you are the easiest person to fool". It's incredibly difficult to keep yourself on track. It's just so easy to work on bullshit.
Things that never cease to blow my mind in that regard:
- Asking yourself constantly, "What am I trying to achieve here?"
- Disengaging from the computer, going for a walk to lying down in the hammock. Often gives you ideas that you didn't see while you were in the "tunnel vision" of execution.
- If you're waiting for result of action A so you can do action B, try if you can't do action B even without action A completed. Often, you will notice that you actually can.
Also, being conscious of the distinction between "labor" and "work" in Hannah Arendt's sense is helpful:
She defines "labor" as anything that is a recurring drain on your time and energy, and necessary to your survival. So, in a sense, it's the equivalent to a business' overhead. Eating food, mowing the lawn - these are all things that you have to do over and over again just to keep "afloat". These are also the things which do not change the future. One month from now, it just won't make much of a difference whether you mowed your lawn today or not.
In contrast, "work" in Arendt's sense is anything where you create something that did not exist before. Something that has a value in and of itself. And which, once created, will continue to exist, and will continue to add value to the future, even if you did drop dead right now. Writing a piece of software that people use. Building a lawn mowing robot. And, not to forget, teaching your kids and being a good role model to them. These are all examples of "work".
This is not to say that, when demands of "work" and "labor" collide, you should always choose the work over the labor. But you should be conscious of the difference, and take that into account when you choose what activity is going to have the greatest value to you.
This is the "keeping yourself on track" part, and the "not wasting your energy on things that do not need to get done".
The other part is the Red Queen / arms race thing. And I think one thing that might be important and useful here is to try to avoid competition (duh!). Or, at least, to be very strategic about when to engage in competition and when not to. Picking your battles, so to speak, as opposed to fighting any battle that presents itself.
I mean, one way some people get out of the rat race is to let others compete against each other. Amazon is doing that with its marketplace sellers. So not allowing yourself to become an Amazon marketplace seller would probably be a good idea. There are always these areas that are "en vogue", where there's a community about it, podcasts about it, etc.. I tend to see those things as red flags. Because if there are people there already "selling shovels", you know that the space is over-crowded. Much better to go some place no one seems to be talking about. Or even a place which, if you talk about it, people will think you're an idiot.
In investing they say, "Buy on fear, sell on greed". The same, I think, applies to choosing where to "invest" your time and energy. Any place that people avoid, do not see, or even fear likely is a much better choice. Although, just as in investing, the price you pay for the freedom from competition is uncertainty, a lack of approval from others, and not being taken seriously. Though one can slowly learn to recognize these symptoms as a sign that the path you've chosen is a good one in terms of being free from hype and competition. That's not a guarantee that it will work out for you, of course. But you're at least playing according to your own rules now.
I'd be happy to continue the conversation.