Tell HN: Don't bring your loud mechanical keyboard to the office

I might be biased for being old, but this is how all keyboards sounded for a long time, and headphones mostly stayed at home. You'll be fine. What you should really be addressing are people who burn popcorn and microwave fish in the office. Those are the real monsters.

So I need to type on a slushy dome-switch or butterfly keyboards because the aural distractions for you are so greatly terrible?

How 'bout you just get some headphones so you can't hear the staccato clickity-clack of me making progress on my typewriter while you are busy acquiring another neurosis.

I'd like to be able to type properly please. If you were typing too instead of complaining, you'd learn why we need switches that work properly.

I ended up marrying the chick who stank up the office with microwaved fish.

Not sure what the lesson is although we’re still married after 30 years.

I can't hear the keyboards due to the blowhard hustlers talking on the phones.

WFH has many advantages in addition to avoiding long commutes.

What a wonderful example of corporate life. This is the type of carefully crafted political office bs I hate, from the double speak to the use of unnecessary exclamation points. Right out of the gate it starts with what they want you to do, sans exclamation point, "Don't bring your loud mechanical keyboard to the office". Then it immediately backs off with saying a couple of things to should like they're being reasonable. They "get it". They've "soared in popularity among engineers". I'm wondering why they needed to quality it as among engineers which leads me to suspect that they aren't one. "Owning a custom piece of beautifully crafted equipment is delightful!"

Now that we've stroked your ego and complimented your keyboard we get down to it "I implore you to not use them them at the office" So now we've established that you're use of a mechanical keyboard is completely frivolous and ego driven while they have a legitimate complaint. While you're just admiring your "beautifully crafted equipment" they're dealing with piercing noise.

Now that they've made their case they need to back off again to appear reasonable by offering a couple of helpful suggestions to get you comply with their demand/request with the implication that there are no compromises being made with these dampening solutions.

We follow up with denying what they're sure the reader is thinking, "This person is a dick", with, "Truly not trying to be a dick writing this". Oh, but you are. "I really get the excitement!" There's that useless exclamation point. They totally get it, not enough to get one themselves, or not write a dickish email but they get it. "The sound has been driving me up the wall, and I can't be the only one" and now we finally get to it. They just don't like it and they want you to stop. You can't be the only one because everyone is like them and they're so reasonable that there must be people out there like them.

Either take an office poll or shut the hell up. You very well may be the only one. You've completely marginalized and dismissed any serious medical advantage to the wellbeing of my fingers and wrists. Those are my money makers. Without that I'm screwed. You know what that sound is? It's the sound of money being made. It's what's probably paying your salary so no I'm not going to leave my mechanical keyboard at home and I'm not going to put those shitty o-rings on my keyboard.