I feel like the whole loneliness thing is mostly the person's fault. Instead of being your own man, you are trying to live up to someone else's expectations. Lets face it, as a startup founder you have a LOT more on your plate than some ex-highschool football quarterback who works at the Gap.
A hacker's loneliness
11–20 of 74 posts
Re: A hacker's loneliness
#12There is also problem with relationships with some women. I think, most women don't mind you are spending so much time with a computer (as long as you are making good money doing it). But they are jealous they must share the love and attention with something like a computer. That is something unbearable for them. In this case, you as a hacker have to lie that you hate your daily work, your boss is an asshole and you…
This happens to many people who are very into their work, computers or not. I have 2 good friends who are both very successful artists, and they are both divorced because of their commitment to their work.
My opinion is maybe biased by living in central Europe. But I see many people who are not satisfied with their work and realize their passions somewhere else (family, hobbies, you name it). I'm a little afraid here it is still social norm even 20 years after communism era. As far as I can observe women are more often these unsatisfied workers because they tend to have worse and less paid jobs and what more: they are naturally "hardwired" to be passionate about family in the first place. So they don't understand someone is going to work not for money, but for fun and his passion.
Re: A hacker's loneliness
#13It hasn't driven away my family, but it does drive away friends. Lol.
It did that to me for a while, too; I would always want to explain to them my latest idea or tell them about some awesome new language or something. They would yawn. They're still awesome people, but sometimes I wish there were people around me who I could associate with and discuss computer hobbies with. (Sadly, being in school doesn't give you many opportunities to meet new people very often, it seems to me...)
School is THE place to meet new people. In fact, enjoy the variety of people you meet at school now. It's harder to meet interesting people later on, after you are out of school. Most people are content with discussing what they saw on TV last night and what their lunch companion has on their plate. "Is that pesto?" Enjoy your school years :)
Re: A hacker's loneliness
#14I wasn't sure if this is appropriate. However, it expresses the loneliness that I, and, I expect, some other hackers, sometimes feel.
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Re: A hacker's loneliness
#15Earlier quoted context omitted.
It did that to me for a while, too; I would always want to explain to them my latest idea or tell them about some awesome new language or something. They would yawn. They're still awesome people, but sometimes I wish there were people around me who I could associate with and discuss computer hobbies with. (Sadly, being in school doesn't give you many opportunities to meet new people very often, it seems to me...)
School is THE place to meet new people. In fact, enjoy the variety of people you meet at school now. It's harder to meet interesting people later on, after you are out of school. Most people are content with discussing what they saw on TV last night and what their lunch companion has on their plate. "Is that pesto?" Enjoy your school years :)
Statements like the above always frustrate me.
I'm in school (and have been for a long time). Many people that I respect told me: grad school was the best part in their lives, that I should enjoy my time, and that it only goes downhill afterwards (no more research, family obligations, boring jobs, administration work, etc.).
Great. But what if I don't like my situation right now? What if I don't like grad school that much? What if I don't like most of the people around me? If the sentiment that grad school is the best part of life is correct, then what else is there to look forward to? What's the point?
(sorry for being all gloomy, but the parent's post really struck a nerve)
Re: A hacker's loneliness
#16Moderation.
If you let any one thing consume all of your time then you're missing out on all the beauty and diversity the world and life can offer.
Feed your brain new experiences and it will reward you.
Re: A hacker's loneliness
#17This is sad, I feel this way while doing a CS degree at Berkeley and working in front of a computer for UCSF in my spare time.
Instead of just complaining and racking up karma, I propose we meet up at a bar in the city (San Francisco to you non-bay area residents). Who's with me to get drunk and tell nerdy jokes on Saturday night?
I'm totally not kidding. If you need an excuse, call it networking. If you don't, call it partying.
[Edit: I'm down for seedier mission bars, but anywhere is fine if there's enough interest.]
Re: A hacker's loneliness
#18I wasn't sure if this is appropriate. However, it expresses the loneliness that I, and, I expect, some other hackers, sometimes feel.
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Or you can spend time doing what you want with people who also like doing that, and be truly happy. I live with 3 other hackers and love it.
Re: A hacker's loneliness
#19Earlier quoted context omitted.
School is THE place to meet new people. In fact, enjoy the variety of people you meet at school now. It's harder to meet interesting people later on, after you are out of school. Most people are content with discussing what they saw on TV last night and what their lunch companion has on their plate. "Is that pesto?" Enjoy your school years :)
Statements like the above always frustrate me. I'm in school (and have been for a long time). Many people that I respect told me: grad school was the best part in their lives, that I should enjoy my time, and that it only goes downhill afterwards (no more research, family obligations, boring jobs, administration work, etc.). Great. But what if I don't like my situation right now? What if I don't like grad school that…
Totally agree.
Coincidentally, I'm in school and many people have told me the same thing.
To be honest, I don't "enjoy" anything about it. This only makes me wonder if college is supposed to be the "best part of your life", (and its quite the opposite for me); then the the rest of my life should be pretty darn depressing.
Re: A hacker's loneliness
#20Earlier quoted context omitted.
School is THE place to meet new people. In fact, enjoy the variety of people you meet at school now. It's harder to meet interesting people later on, after you are out of school. Most people are content with discussing what they saw on TV last night and what their lunch companion has on their plate. "Is that pesto?" Enjoy your school years :)
Statements like the above always frustrate me. I'm in school (and have been for a long time). Many people that I respect told me: grad school was the best part in their lives, that I should enjoy my time, and that it only goes downhill afterwards (no more research, family obligations, boring jobs, administration work, etc.). Great. But what if I don't like my situation right now? What if I don't like grad school that…
You sound really frustrated. Life is too short. If you hate grad school that much, drop it. Life certainly isn't downhill after school. My personal experience showed that the most interesting people I met, I met at school, not in cubicle land. Then again, it's what you make of it.